Anonymous
Anonymous asked in HealthMental Health · 1 decade ago

How many years were you verbally bullied in school?

How many years were you verbally bullied in school? What kind of things did the people who bullied you say or do to you? How did you endure or overcome from being bullied? Do you still have painful memories, flashbacks, and setbacks from being bullied? Are you still being made fun of and ridiculed?

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I was bullied by other kids throughout elementary school and middle school, really until I started high school. So about eight years? As far as what kind of things I got made fun of for, you could probably make a shorter list of things I didn't get made fun of for... my clothes, my hair, my teeth, the way I talked, the way I ran, being tall, being skinny, having freckles, having glasses, having braces, so on and so forth. I remember one girl used to steal my lunch every day in 4th and 5th grade, just because she knew she could. She also used to push me out of chairs because she was bigger than me. Other kids would sing mean songs about me, make up mean rhymes about the way I looked, use me as the butt of pranks, etc.

    I got lucky in that once I started high school the braces came off and I started coming out of my ugly duckling phase. Add to that the fact that I learned how to stand up for myself, and the teasing stopped. I had a really wonderful high school experience, no bullying at all even though I went to school with all the same kids as I did in middle school who made fun of me. I didn't hold it against them, we were all young and stupid, it happens.

    How did I endure or overcome being bullied? I think it was because I had a great group of friends, despite being teased by a lot of kids. My friends and I were the nerds, I guess you could say, but we had each other so it didn't matter so much what the other kids said. We knew that we liked each other the way we were, so the fact that some of the other kids didn't like us wasn't a huge deal. If I had been isolated or had fewer friends it probably would have affected me a lot more, but because I had a fairly large group of good friends the bullying wasn't a huge detriment in my life. If I ever felt bad about myself because of being teased, I always had good friends to fall back on and help me feel better about myself.

    I am an adult now and honestly I will tell you that there will ALWAYS be some kind of situation where you will be made fun of, or feel awkward in, not belong with other people, etc. Bullying and being made fun of doesn't end just because you graduate from school... cliques are just as real in the "adult world" as they are in high school. They are less powerful forces than they were in high school, but they still exist, and you will still find the "catty girls" from high school all sitting together at lunch at work making fun of some unsuspecting woman you work with. That much doesn't ever actually change.

    What changes is how you deal with it. When I got into high school I stopped putting up with being made fun of, I put my foot down and I made it stop. When I stopped being an easy target the other girls realized they weren't having fun anymore and they left me alone. When I became more self confident on my own, just from growing up and getting more comfortable in my own skin, people were much more likely to be friendly with me than to try to tease me or ignore me.

    People are drawn to confident people, like attracts like. Antisocial people don't generally make friends with the social butterflies in their class because those types of people just aren't really drawn to one another. When you become more sociable, you draw a more sociable crowd. I always stayed true to my original "nerd" friends, and I always kind of self-identify as a nerd, but by my senior year I was friends with people from every 'group' at my high school. You can't change the fact that people bully you, but you can change your reaction to it, and as a result you do actually have some control over the bullying behavior by not being a walking target anymore.

  • 1 decade ago

    Basically 6-12th grade (died down 11 by year 12 though). Well, in 6th grade, I went to a small private school of 100 kids. I was bullied b/c I was new and everyone had already known each other since pre-k. There was this girl who would call me ugly everyday and make fun of my nose (she had a bigger nose than me fyi). She thought she was all that but she looked like a horse and had straggly hair with a receding hairline. Guys picked on me too, calling me ugly, stupid, retarded. Highschool was no picnic. I was bullied by a fat girl on my bus who started hating on me for no reason at all. I was also bullied by this guy (this is the worst dosage of it all). He said I was ugly, didn't get any, had no friends, that people should be embarassed to be seen in public with me, that I was a beast, looked like shrek, that he would put the ugliest person in the world in a category better looking than me. I just shrugged it off and concentrated on my grades. Now, I'm a junior in college, and love it so much. People are so much more mature. It's not forever, but it definitely has stuck with me to the point where I look at myself and wonder if I'm ugly, if those people really thought I was or were just being assholes. I'm getting over it though. I wouldn't say I flashback, but I remember it from time to time and keep asking myself, why I think they did it. I'm really focused on my appearance. Alot of people tell me I am pretty when I post pictures online, and friends/ family tell me I am. It has made me always need reasureance, which I am also trying to get over.

  • 1 decade ago

    If you are being bullied, first you need to tell someone, parents or school counselor. I am a female and between 8th and 9th grade grew to 5' 8" and was very thin. I was constantly made fun of, some very hurtful and embarrassing things were said by guys and very mean girls. But guess what, at 25 many of the girls that teased me look 40 and I am still tall and slim. People bully others to make themselves feel superior in some way but inside they are insecure idiots. Hold your head up, be strong and learn to ignore the idiots. Take care.

  • Katie
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    I'm sorry, I can't speak for myself, but I can speak for my 14 year old son because I've had to watch the devastating effects. My son was called fat all day long, every day. Kids wanted to fight him just for being different. (He is totally non-violent so he won't fight back) They call him a girl, make fun of him because he is a virgin, (which he wants to save himself for that special someone) They push him, punch him, trip him, throw things in his hair. He came home every day for a straight week & a half with hand sanitizer all over his entire back. I made numorous calls to the school, and every time there where excuses made about the perpetrators. My son has endured bullying for the past 2 years, and I'm told there is no alternative school he can go to. For this reason, I have chosen to homeschool my son so I can instill in him the wonderful qualities he has. My son is a beautiful person in spirit, and would never harm anyone. I've seen the devastating effects that bullying has had on him. He has become depressed, and tends to isolate himself. He feels safe here at home with his bigger brother and I. I just wish he could go out in the world (in his world with other's his own age) and feel safe. He is no longer being ridiculed since he no longer attends that school. But, you know what-My son wants to be a doctor when he grown up, so chances are-he will be caring for all of those kids who made him so miserable for 2 years. Hope they appreciate him more then.

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  • 6 years ago

    For my whole life I have been bullied and it is just styling worse as the years pass. I am currently 14. I guess it is because I am really quiet and strange. People call me fat and ugly. I'm definitely not fat and I guess I am average looking. But they say I also have no friends and everyone hates me which I know isn't true because I actually have quite a few really good friends. So yeah about 11 years when I first joined kindergarten

  • 1 decade ago

    7 years straight, from age 7 to 14. School was hell, I had literally only 3 friends, everyone else bullied me about everything possible. And yes I have flashbacks, memories and people still give me a hard time. I'm 15 now and am going through depression, thanks to the people in school, I onced called my friends.

  • 1. 10 years, it was happening in school and at home (cousins from school lived with us, and they bullied me physically and verbally)

    2. They told me I was fat and dumb (at the time, I was short and chubby from my toddler years in eating. I took abuterol for asthma, and the steroid made me ravenous) They made me feel like I was worthless and that I had to be athletically identical to everyone else.

    3. It went on, until I went to a different school. Where I was bullied twice as much, and it hurt even more.

    4. Yes, tons of them. School, home, all of them. Frequently I have flash backs. I feel setback socially, I am less likely to approach someone for a fear of being made fun of/humiliated/criticized/judged/embarrassed or negatively evaluated.

    5. Sadly yes. I go to my parents for help with bullies, they deny i have problems period, and neglect me. I went to the counselor, he told me what Jesus would do (religious high school).

    It sucks. Thanks for asking. :)

    Source(s): Social Phobic Sufferer of Depression for 3 and 1/2 years
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Bullying lasts a long time in school unless you know some things

    God wants you to know truth, forgive, and get away from them. You sure feel better after reading the links.

    http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-Emotional-Abuse-f... -Abuse from parent

    http://www.nemasys.com/ghostwolf/Resources/abusede... - Are you being abused or not?

    http://www.googobits.com/articles/2446-inside-the-... The mind of an abuser

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b30iwhEw9ho

    Youtube thumbnail

    See real docs explain what shrinks do.

    Source--Seeing people healed on a regular basis in a ministry- healing without meds.

    30+ years exp -abuse etc..

  • 1 decade ago

    i wasn't at school, but i have an uncle who is strict and i am a slow eater and i also don't eat as much because i don't eat as fast as everyone in my family, so all 17 years of my life i have had to deal with him "lecturing" me on how its ok to eat because its not good to starve and i need to eat in a hurry.

    I've learned to do my own thing and that'll help for a little bit, then i just have to stand up for myself. As for memories, i oppress them.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I was bullied from gr3-gr11. In elementary school girls always called me "stupid", "why do u always wear weird clothes" and "get a haircut!"

    In highschool, some girl i went to dance classes with always would say "she sucks", "omg! what a loser!", also "shes not that pretty" and "reject" This girl thought she was better than me, prettier than me, smarter than me...etc.

    I also had a couple guys in highschool call me "weird", "stupid", "loser" and "reject".

    I've now just finished my first year of university. Yes, on days i feel bad i do have flash backs and they do hurt...especially since nobody would tell these mean girls to shut up.

    But guess what? University is great! Everybody makes their own friends, has their own studies, lots of activities, the bars. I love it all!

    I am also now with an agency for Model and Talent work. I audition to be on prints/bill boards/magazines/commericals/live theatre productions/extras in motion pictures movies/i also have the opportunity to audition for music videos which i hope to do this comming year.

    How did i survive and overcome bullying? Well, during those hard years i had fun times with the friends i had then, also i continued getting involved in dance and sports even though girls would say to me "you suck, why do you dance?....why do u play soccer??"...but my parents said "stick with it. Dont let these girls bully you. You have as much right to be there as they do"

    You know, all i can say is that bullying is not fun. And it hurts. But definitely surround urself with family and friends. The people who love you, it will give u a boost of confidence :)

    Seriously, all those years i had NO confidence even though i was involved in many activies. I was so insecure and i didnt think i was worth it. And these girls believed they were gorgeous and i wasnt...and i believed it. But i finally learned something.

    Thats the key. Have Confidence! Head held high, stand tall. And i dont want to sound conceited, but it really made a difference. And now i have new friends, still doing the old activities, but confidence has changed the way i interact with people and how people treat me.

    I saw one of the girls who bullied me, i see her on campus sometimes, and because i am confident now and the way i hold myself, she kinda doesn't say much whereas before she wouldn't hesitate to call something out to me. One time we were walking towards eachother on the walkway and i looked straight at her and she looked so awkward. She actually started pulling at her hair, looking down at her shoes and up at me and back at the shoes....

    And since i had my head help up to her for the first time, i could see what she really looked like.

    she's not slimer than me, our weight is the same! and her face isn't pretty, its flushed red from anger and she has beady angry eyes and gives this looks as if she smells poop.....I still can't believe i let her believe she was prettier than me... shes an angry stressed out bully of a child who has to put others down to make her feel better.

    And those guys from highschool who i see at the gym, well they dont say anything to me now. They look at me and look away. Especially since I dont bow my head to them anymore, i look right at them and have the head held up, look them in the eyes, i smile for a split second and walk right past them. :)

    Anyways. All i can say is, have confidence, be your own best friend and love yourself for you :)

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