? asked in Arts & HumanitiesBooks & Authors · 10 years ago

Does my book idea sound Twilighty?

So, the idea practically goes like this.

It's about a girl called Alison. She has a best friend called Lucca. She's in her twenties. She moves to a different sate (it's set in America) and she gets a new job as a teaching assistant. The teacher she works with is called Mason Hughes. They start dating and then they become a official couple. After a few years he proposes to her and she accepts.

After another few months she hasn't heard from Lucca in a while and decides to give him a call. He doesn't answer. She keeps trying several times everyday, but still no answer.

One day she gets a call from Lucca's mom, telling Alison that Lucca has been missing for several weeks, and her dad who she hasn't spoke to since she was sixteen, had died.

Alison is obviously devastated about this news. After a few days, she starts waking up in the middle of the night and starts to see Lucca in the corner of her room. After the second night she makes contact with him and she sees that he's different. She confronts Mason and he just says she's missing him. Lucca visits her every night, and after a while she finds out he's a vampire, turned into one by his former lover, Tammie.Because Lucca is so unbelievably beautiful, she falls for him and leaves Mason.

While making love to Lucca, he loses control and bites Alison in the neck, turning her into one of them. She falls out of love with Lucca after he proves to her what a monster he is. Alison finds out she's pregnant, but doesn't know who the dad is. When she has the baby, she realizes it's Masons, which makes Lucca ballistic. Alison goes back to Mason, who greets her with open arms. They live a happy life with their daughter, Sarah, and get married. At the end of the book, Lucca kidnaps Sarah, still believing it's his baby.

There is going to be a sequel of the book (if I do decide to write it) and it's going to be Sarah telling the story when she's older, older being sixteen, and she's set out to find her real dad, and her mom who she hasn't seen in fifteen years.

I have wrote the prologue and the first chapter, and I might decide to post it if I get good replies :).

Sorry for making this so long!!!


I'm 12 by the way :)

12 Answers

  • 10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Some of it is similar to Twilight, namely Allison seeing Lucca in her sleep. However, it seems a lot more mature than Twilight and the story is totally different, I'm actually beginning to like this better than I ever did Twilight. Just make sure you have a set plot path, implement some twists that keep your reader guessing, and have fun with it! I'm really actually hoping I get to read this, so if you post it, mail me the link =D millieiscute @ yahoo.com is my email. (Please no junk xD)

    Twilight is much more of a goody-goody story, as with Bella not "making love" until she's married, Edward being able to control himself, ect. This story shows a much darker side to vampire love, which I think sets it apart. You can post this story on http://fictionpress.com/ if you want to =D And since you said your age, I'll say mine. I'm 13 ^_^

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  • 10 years ago

    I like it even though anything dealing with vampires could be compared to Twilight nowadays. I didn't get that Lucca was a boy though until the middle.

    Things to think about. If Alison and Mason become an official thing, what does Alison then do for a living? It's doubtful they would work together as teachers. Is there any romantic tension between Alison and Lucca or is he hurt by her decision to marry someone else? I think it'd be more effective for Lucca's Mom to call her out of the blue. How does the father die? Is Alison close enough to Lucca's family to attend the funeral?

    Traditional vampires need to be invited in, so if she sees him in her room it could be a dream. I think she'd be freaked out by that (wouldn't you?). Also where did Mason go that she'd be missing him? Then I doubt Mason would rush back to her with open arms if she so suddenly dumped him. Unless Lucca has her under a spell. It could be good though, so good luck with it!

    Another thing - I have written, not wrote.

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  • 10 years ago

    Sure, it has some Twilight origins, but the thing that separates it from Twilight, is the fact that it seems older, more mature. Also, something that separates it is the fact that she originally loves Mason, switches to Lucca, switches to Mason again. Lucca bites her, something different then Twilight, where Edward is always able to control himself. This is good, very good really. And your twelve, so I hope you know enough about making Love(:

    Good luck!

    Source(s): My own knowledge.
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  • 10 years ago

    It sounds good to me. Just make sure you don't forget when Alison and Mason get back together that Alison is a vampire, as you just so stated after making love with Lucca. So how does she resist her urges to bite Mason? Does he know she is a vampire? etc etc

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  • WOW I LOVE THIS IDEA! I SO WANNA READ IT (Possibly email it to me when your finished, just click on my username and it will tell you that you can email me... only if you don't mind of course).

    It Doesn't Sound Twilight Based, And With Your Writing Style, It Could Be NOTHING Like Twilight. I Hate The Fear That Writers/Authors Have To Endure Nowadays That Their Vampire Stories Might Turn Out Like Twilight, It's Ridiculous.

    Go Ahead And Write It, I'm Only 13 So Your Age Doesn't Matter :) Good Luck.

    Thanks For Answering Mine! :) Sure I'd Love To Do A Story Swap Sometime ... I'll Have To Write It First. Feel Free To Email Me At: danielle_bramley@yahoo.com

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  • 10 years ago

    It is not really Twilight-y.

    I mean, yeah, it is similar, with having two guys that the main character loves, the vampire, and the daughter, but the plot is completely different and in no way relates to Twilight.

    If the book would ever get published, though, you would definitely have a lot of Twi-hards reading your book. I would be one of them! :)

    WOW! You are only twelve and you wrote this? You are very talented!

    Source(s): A fellow writer and a HUGE Twi-hard.
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  • kia
    Lv 4
    3 years ago

    i think of you presentation of the story is relatively like the decrease back of a e book jacket, meaning i could be lasting extra context which you will or won't have planned. this attitude, even with the undeniable fact that, looks to make the ending evident. this does not make you tale undesirable even with the undeniable fact that. The trick even with the shown fact that right here would be how nicely you are able to attain that ingredient. One could to strike the careful stability between affected person progression devoid of uninteresting your readers, a job that stressful circumstances all writers. To take you aim industry in even with the undeniable fact that would require a great variety of emphatic writing, getting human beings to understand the sentiments of the character Sydney. Syndey could desire to have a protracted inventory of thoughts that helps the reader to quite understand. in short you'll want a firmly customary emotional state communicated to the reader to describe this actually outrageous degree of mistrust. in keeping with threat she could be stricken by some variety of paranoia, which isn't not likely with this variety of turbulent existence. i could propose examining Victor Hugo's Les Miserables (the seen the place Val Jean is caught stealing from the bishop, or the place he purchases the doll in the window for cosette) or perhaps an orson scott card e book, speaker for the ineffective. those authors are quite sturdy with conversing the emotion of the characters, they concentration on what seems to be your greatest undertaking: communique of emotion.

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  • 10 years ago

    I really like it, it has the same "girl falls in love with vampire" thing to it, but much more twisted and original. Good luck!

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  • 10 years ago

    Twilighty makes the book seem like a parody of Twilight, but good storyline i like!

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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    I don't think it sounds like twilight at all. I really like it!

    Good luck!

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