BREAK UP with a guy that went to a STRIP CLUB?
Im not a big prude or anything - just hear me out.
So im in a relatively new relationship w a guy i really like. I recently found out he went out w his buddies to a strip club after the fact. This really bothered and hurt my feelings. I dont like the idea od him buying lap dances to have a completely nude female grinding up on him while he caresses her body. I am in a point in my life where my career is on the rise, i am simply lookng for a relationship and a guy that doesnt hurt my feelings. I dont WANT to devote MY time and limited energy to a guy that hurts my feelings or makes me worry.
Guy and girls? Do you think this is a reasonable expectation, even though my bf and i never made "ground" rules. For example, he never told me i couldnt go to a male strip club and have a man rub his face all over my..., right? I am sure THAT wouldnt be tolerated.
So is this reasonable?
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obviously guys are going to defend this but i find that very hurtful too.
like paying for another women's company isn't exactly nice would he like it if you paid for a laptop of a man? no!!!
so you are in the right move on and find a guy who deserves you and treats you right.
- 10 years ago
I think it's reasonable to expect that he remains faithful to you. Don't get me wrong he didn't cheat, but he did show that he was interested in other women.
Talk to him, tell him the truth. Tell him how you felt and make him understand that you won't be put through that. If he doesn't give you the answer that you want this is going to take more work then you sound like you're able to put into it.
Be firm and strong on this, if he's looking elsewhere then perhaps you should too... after a breakup of course. (I hope it doesn't come to this)
- RACHELLv 410 years ago
You aren't wrong, however I think you need to talk to him about what really happened. He may not have got a lap dance or the strippers had clothes. Also, he may have been forced into it by his buddies and stayed away from the strippers. You just don't know. Be cautious if he isn't trustworthy.
I think its harmless fun for fellas to go to strip clubs. Its not like theyre copping off with the strippers. Its just things what a group of male mates like to do.
I would try not to worry and freak out about something that is really mostly harmless. I wouldnt mind my fella going aslong as he came home to my bed and finished the night off with me.
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- GretaLv 710 years ago
Oh, I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're saying. You need to plan a girl's night out and go to a male strip club with some of YOUR "buddies." He'll prolly say something about it, and then you can say, "Oh, well since you went to a strip club I thought it was okay."
I used to be all worried about my boyfriend going to strip clubs and then this one day he was like, "Why would I wanna PAY to get teased? I can get that for free with you and I actually get something out of it." LOL.
- Anonymous10 years ago
Some women are ok with this....but if you are not ...tell him your concern and if he wants to make a long term relationship then you would prefer not for him to go..........you don't have to be concern about some of these women...this is their job and most do not want any parts of a man...they see men all the time with their lustful eyes........they see men a dime a dozen..........
well you could probably tell him not to do it but i wouldn't break up with him over it its like breaking up with a guy for looking at porn its pretty stupid but i see where you are coming from being hurt by him going out and letting other girls get that close to him and whatnot
just talk to him
- Anonymous10 years ago
How do you know he got a lap dance? I think you're making too big a deal out of this.
- 10 years ago
Do not break up. It is unlikely that it was even his idea to go. It could have even been peer pressure. Its even better for him if you go next time. I rarely go without my wife.