Abbusive relationship, 27 weeks pregnant, and only 17 years old. :( Help please..?
I cant take it anymore, i try to look right past the bad things my babys father has done to me, but he always does it again (put his hands on me.) We've been together for about a year now, and i since i got pregnant (im not sure why) he has been putting his hands on me.. (which dont make since cause you would think he wouldnt since i got pregnant, but now he has no problem with it.)
He is the jealous type.. he thinks about hisself way to much and he has grown to be an complete A**HOLE! Heres the story about how this happend ;
Yesterday i wanted to go to this little water park so my mom gave me 20 dollars. Its 8 dollars for a person, so i was going to pay for him also. Instead we desided we would go today because it was to late in the day yesterday to go cause it takes about 30 minutes to get there from where i live. So we went to a local fair. I told him put 3 dollars of that 20 in the gas tank so we would have enough for us to go to the water park.. then later on when we went to the fair he bought himself a drink and i thought that was coming out of his pocket cause he did have money himself. Well then later we went to his mothers house and he asked me if he could use my car to go get something, i said yes and he came back a little while later to get me and we went to my house and went to sleep (my room is upstairs.. my dad will not let him stay here so i had to sneak him in.. my mom knew but my dad would have a FIT.) Well this morning i got up and my dad left and my mom was working so i was like "lets go to the water park" and he said "do you have any money?" And i was like "uhh yeah, the money i told you to hold for me.. how much do i have?!" And he replied "10 dollars.." So i got mad! I was like "WTF! How??? I only put 3 in gas and the rest i told you to H O L D, not spend!" And he was like "uhh the drink i got at the fair and that other 5 i put in gas when i used your car?" I was like "Umm, i didnt know i was paying for YOUR drink and i didnt even know you put 5 in my gas tank! I told you not to spend anymore", so we went around and around about that money! Well he cussed at me, i cussed back, we made up, then we got into it again because his mom lives on the other side of town and we had desided we were going to the pool which is on the WHOLE OTHER side of town from his moms and i only had 10 dollars to last me. He was made cause i wouldnt take him all the way to his moms then to the pool, i have no AC in my car and it is WAY to hot to be just out here waisting gas and riding around. Well i got mad cause i have shorts here he could have worn and he always wears them.. so i didnt see any reason he wouldnt now. (Besides to be an a**hole and just start a argument) So we got in a argument.. and he was like JUST TAKE ME THE F*CK HOME! So i was like "Ok good!" (meaning i needed time for myself) he ran across the room and grabbed me by my throat and slammed me up against the wall and choked me! I started crying and trying to get him off of me. (He is 6'3 and im 5'5, he is like 220 lbs and im like 180?)
So i grabbed my keys and i grabbed my extra key to cause i knew he would take my set of keys i drove there with when we got to his house cause then he desides he wants to work sht out. so he kept telling me to come in and tlk to him, and i wouldnt so he took my keys and walked inside.. well i yelled out the window "i have my other key!" he was like "well use it!" So i left.. now im here.. typing this.
I dont know what to do.. i do everything for this boy and i get nothing but hurt in return!
He is crazy, and i dont know how to get away from him... (without the law)
what do i do? if i just stop tlking to him and tell him its over do you think he will leave me alone?
Im scared of him.. and he is always trying to put his "cousins" on me.. (the girls) and he threatens me a lot too.
what do i do?
sry this is so long, but thanks for your help!
- Sophia's MommyLv 51 decade agoFavorite Answer
You need to get out of this abusive relationship. He is your baby's father, but you don't need him by your side with the way he acts. You need peace and tranquility to focus on your child, not someone who is going to be hurting you and stressing you out. If he won't leave you alone then you need to get the legal authorities involved. You really can never be too sure how far he will take his abuse. You have yourself and also your mother for support (it seems like). Best of luck to you and remember you and your child are what's important now.
- sick of itLv 51 decade ago
Leave him. no if, ands or buts, If he sics his cousins on you- call the police and have a restraining order put on them, too. PUT A RESTRAINING ORDER ON ALL OF THEM>>>>
GET YOUR PARENTS INVOLVED. YOU ARE IN OVER YOUR HEAD>AND YOU KNOW IT>
You can't just think about you- think about the child- Do you really want to deal with this with an infant or even a toddler? No? Well, then you will have to be strong now, and leave him. See if you can stay with some family that live away from where you do now- get your ducks lined up so that you can possibly relocate permanently. Do not hesitate to get the police involved if you feel threatened. I know you are upset, but objectively looking at this- you need to detach from him emotionally and make some better decisions. Having a baby is chaotic enough without all this drama. You think it sucks now? It will be unbearable then and if he hurt your child you will blame yourself- Think about that- If he hurts you while you are PREGNANT- then HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT THE BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- *LaLaGina*Lv 51 decade ago
Yes, leave him. Right now.
Tell your parents what has been going on and that you feel threatened and abused. This is a serious problem, abuse is not something to be messed with, it can ALWAYS get worse.
Stay away from him at all cost.
Honestly, go tell your parents. It might be uncomfortable but you'll need their support and their protection if he tries to show up at your house unannounced after you break it off. Also, tell your parents about threatening to "put his cousins on you". Physical threats should be taken seriously.
Get out of this relationship NOW before serious damage is done to you or your child.
- captb007Lv 71 decade ago
This guy assaulted your when he grabbed your throat. Call a women's group in your area and they will tell you how to file charges against him. You could go right to the police and tell them what happened and then file assualt charges against him. This guy is no good for you and things will only go down hill from this point on. If you do not act on this, he will continue with this kind of behavior and most likely it will get worse and he will beat you. He is unreliable and dangerous. Get away from him as soon as possible. Get help.
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- 1 decade ago
Get out as fast as you can!!! He's not worth your time, your money nor YOUR LIFE! He's evidently not going to be any help with your child; in fact, he will probably abuse the child too. There are many free places that can help you. Look for those and take care of yourself before it's too late. A violent partner can and will harm you for as long as he can. It will not go away, ever!
- 1 decade ago
There really isn't much you can do without getting the law involved. Firstly, you need to tell your parents about it and get their advice. Does he have a job? If you leave him you need to organise some support for the child when it's born. If you really want to leave him it's best to cut all contact with him. Good luck I hope I helped! :)
- KnottyJLv 51 decade ago
First of all you need to tell your parents and get support from them. Then you need to file a restraining order and get him out of your life. He is NO GOOD! Especially if your pregnant, think of the baby. What is going to stop him from abusing an innocent child if he can slap you around like it's no problem. GET AWAY FROM HIM! I know it's not going to be easy, but you have to wake up and realize how dangerous this is for you and your child! Please talk to an adult you trust and get him out of your life ASAP!
- Anonymous1 decade ago
You should leave his disgrace-to-the-male-population-***....I mean yeah all guys can be ***** but thats just not right AT ALL. He needs to learn to respect his woman especially if shes carrying a baby.
- 1 decade ago
It sounds like you need to get the law involved. That relationship is not healthy for you or your baby!
- 1 decade ago
Very simple...... LEAVE HIM!