Do you have any funny notes on facebook (kinda long, sowwie!)?

Can you share some? :D

Something like this:

Dear Elsie,

I don't really know how to tell you this, your nostrils are insulting. I think I realized it when I finally changed my underwear in your car and I saw you sit on my father. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. You should aslo know that I always wanted to break your legs and your cucumber-fetishism is weird.

Best of luck on the sex change,

Amber

Here's how you do it:

Dear (someone you recently talked to),

I don't really know how to tell you this, (1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you(4)(5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).

(12),

(Your name)

Then tag people

1) What's the color of your shirt?

Blue - I'm in love with your cat

Red - Our affair is over

White - I’m joining the Convent

Black -Our romance is over

Green- Our socks don't match

Grey - You're a leprechaun

Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy

Pink - Your nostrils are insulting

Brown - The mafia wants you

No shirt - Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you

Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?

January - That night you picked your nose

February -When I quoted Forest Gump

March - When your dwarf bit me

April - When your dog humped my leg

May - When I finally changed my underwear

June - When you put cuffs on me

July – When I saw the purple monkey

August - When you smacked my ***

September - Last year when you peed your pants

October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub

November - When I tripped on peanut butter

December - When i threw out your sock drawer

3) Which food do you prefer?

Tacos - In your apartment

Chicken- In your car

Pasta - Outside of your office

Hamburgers - Under the bus

Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner

Lasagna - In your closet

Kebab - With Jean Chrétien

Seafood - In a clown suit

Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert

Pizza - At the mental hospital

Hot dog - Under a street light

Other - With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?

Yellow - Ignore

Red - Put whipped cream on

Black - Hit on

Blue - Knock out

Purple - Pour syrup on

White - Carve your initials into

Grey - Pull the clothes off

Brown - bite off

Orange - Castrate

Pink - Pull the pants off of

Barefoot - Sit on

Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?

Black - my boyfriend

White - My father

Grey – The Catholic Priest

Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie

Purple - My corned beef hash

Red – My knee caps

Blue - My salt-beef bucket

Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana

Orange - My Blink 182 cd

Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection

Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?

One Tree Hill - Senile

Heroes- Frostbitten

Lost - High

Simpsons- Cowardly

The news - Scarred

American Idol - Masochistic

Family Guy - Open

Top Model - Middle-class

Annat -shamed

7) Your mood right now?

Happy - How awful you are

Sad - How boring you are

Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men

Angry - That your smell makes me vomit

Depressed – That we’re related

Excited - That I may pee my pants

Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you

Worried - That your Ford sucks

Apathetic - That you need a sex-change

Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes

Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist

Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid

Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?

White - Your toe ring

Yellow - Your love letters to me

Red - The pictures from Vegas

Black - Your pet rock

Blue - The couch cushions

Green - Your car

Orange - Your false teeth

Brown - Your nose hair clippers

Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear

Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket

Pink - The cut toenails

Other - Your Hannah Montana underwear

9) The first letter of your first name?

A/B - My virginity

C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it

E/F - Your neighbors dog

G/H - The oil tank from your car

I/J - Your left ear

K/L - The results of that blood-sample

M/N - Your glass eye

O/P - My common sense

Q/R - Your mom

S/T - Your collection of butterflies

U/V - Your criminal record

W/X – Your sucide note

Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?

A/B - Love your sweet, sweet ***

C/D - Always will remember the pep talks

E/F -Never will forget that night

G/H – Will not tell the authorites that you stole the whale from the backyard.

I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly

K/L - Hate your

Update:

BQ: Do the note I posted :)

Update 2:

11) What do you prefer to drink?

Wine- Our friendship is ruined

Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon

Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo

Milk - The apartment building is on fire

Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this

Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice

Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.

Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out

Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird

Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey

Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine

Other – you should stop picking your nose

Update 3:

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?

Thailand – Warm tingly sensations

Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard

France - Love always

Spain - With tears of sadness

China – You make me sick

Germany – Please don’t hurt me

Japan - Go milk a cow

Greece - Your everlasting enemy

USA - Best of luck on the sex change

Egypt – Kiss my butt

England - Go drown yourself

There's 11 and 12 :P sowwie I didn't notice till now! >___<

Update 4:

10) The last letter in your last name?

A/B - Love your sweet, sweet ***

C/D - Always will remember the pep talks

E/F -Never will forget that night

G/H – Will not tell the authorites that you stole the whale from the backyard.

I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly

K/L - Hate your cooking

M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching

O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises

Q/R - Get sick when I think of your feet

S/T - Always wanted to break your legs

U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart

W/X - Haven’t showered in a month

Y/Z – am better off without you

D: rest of 10 >___<

12 Answers

Relevance
  • 10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I'm so doing this... haha

    Dear Michelle, I don't really know how to tell you this relationship is over. I think I realized it when your dog humped my leg outside of your office and I saw you sit on (I'm actually wearing flipflops )the elephant in the corner (green!). I'm sure you're high enough to understand the middle-east is planning their revenge on you. I'm returning your car (using MY room in Idaho... haha, I refuse to call the room in my grandma's house "my" room...I'm so anti-south :P) to you, but I'll keep my virgin collection of your butterflies (haha, it's one of those letters, that's all I'm saying...) as a memory. You should also know that I love your sweet,sweet pep talks (again, it's one of those :P) and you ruined my attempts at another world war.

    Love always, (how boring)

    Flier :P

    Okay, the one I love most is where you pick one music artist and answer questions using that artist's song titles. Example of mine below...

    Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to 15 people you like and include me. You can't use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think! Repost as "my life according to (band name)"

    Pick your Artist:

    Copeland! :O

    Are you a Male or a Female:

    She's Always a Woman (haha)

    Describe Yourself:

    I'm a Sucker for a Kind Word

    How do you feel:

    Strange and Unprepared

    Describe where you currently live:

    On the Safest Ledge

    If you could go anywhere, where would you go:

    Another Day in Paradise

    Your Favorite form of Transportation:

    I'm Safer on an Airplane

    Your Best Friend is:

    By My Side (not really)

    You and your best friends are:

    Not So Tough Found Out (haha, wimpy)

    What's the weather like:

    What Do I Know?

    Favorite Time of Day:

    Sleep

    If your life was a TV show, what would it be called:

    Eat, Sleep, Repeat

    What is life to you:

    No One Really Wins

    Your last relationship:

    Love Affair (ouch! haha)

    Your fear:

    Walking Downtown

    What is the best advice you have to give:

    To Be Happy Now

    Thought for the day:

    Good Morning Fire Eater

    How I would like to die:

    Where's My Head? (haha)

    My soul's present condition:

    Hold Nothing Back

    My motto:

    Careful Now (hehe)

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  • 10 years ago

    Dear Em,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, Our affair is over. I think I realized it when your dwarf bit me Under the bus and I saw you Pour syrup on My father. I'm sure you're Open enough to understand That I may pee my pants. I'm returning The cut toenails to you, but I'll keep Your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I Always will remember the pep talks and I I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo.

    Best of luck on the sex change,

    Caitlin.

    XD.

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  • Dear Ellen,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, our romance is over. I think I realized it when I threw out your sock drawer At the Elton John concert and I saw you sit on My salt-beef bucket . I'm sure you're middle class enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men . I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep your neighbors dog as a memory. You should also know that told in my confession today about the moose poaching and I'm scratching my butt as you read this .

    Greetings to your frog Leonard,

    Emilee

    HAHA!!!!!

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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    Dear Kayla,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, your nostrils are insulting. I think I realized it last year when you peed your pants in your car and I saw you sit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're high enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning the cut toenails to you, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I always wanted to break your legs and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon .

    Go drown yourself,

    Taylor

    :DDD

    And no, I don't have any funny notes. :\

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  • Jessa.
    Lv 6
    10 years ago

    Dear Jane,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, but your nostrils are insulting . I think I realized it that night you picked your nose outside of your office and I saw you drive over your ‘My Little Pony’ collection . I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand how boring you are . I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I get sick when I think of your feet and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.

    Greetings to your frog Leonard,

    Jessa

    Hahaha, so funny.

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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    Dear Jess,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it when i tripped on peanut butter in your apartment and I saw you sit on my blink 182 cd. I'm sure you're middle class enough to understand that ur driving sucks. I'm returning the cut toenails to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. You should also know that I love your sweet sweet @ss and (11).

    (12),

    Becca

    lol that came out intersting...except there is no 11 and 12!

    edit: i find it ironic how the girl above me is named jess and the last girl i talked 2 had that name lol.

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  • That's funny. :-D

    BQ: I'll try, but I bet I'll mess it up.

    Dear Geoff,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, but our socks don't match. I think I realized it last year when you peed your pants with Jean Chrétien, and I saw you sit on my father. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that you need a sex-change. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard, and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.

    Go milk a cow,

    Mercedes

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  • 10 years ago

    Dear Tasha,

    I don't really know how to tell you this but, I'm in love with your cat. I think i realized it when your dog humped my leg at the mental hospital and i saw you knock out the elephant in the corner. I'm sure your frostbitten enough to understand that your ford sucks. I'm returning your nose hair clippers to you, but I'll keep your photo with a mustache drawn on it as a memory.You should also know that i hate your cooking.

    kiss my butt

    -ck

    ah, that took forever=O

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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    Dear Amber,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, our socks don't mach. I think I realized it last year when you peed your pants at the Elton John concert and I saw you sit on my salt beef-bucket. I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that we're related. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I love your sweet, sweet *** and thanks for the cocaine.

    greetings to your frog Lenard,

    Jess

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  • Dear Dylan,

    I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I realized this when your dwarf bit me in your apartment, and I saw you sit on my boyfriend. I'm sure your scarred enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning the couch chair cushions to you, but I'll keep your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I [UHH, WHERE'S THE REST OF THEM? LOL.]

    Source(s): I couldn't finish it because some information was missing. D:
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