Can You Read This and Tell Me What You Think?

Can You Please Read This and Tell Me What You Think? I could hear something, I’m pretty sure I could. It was like thumping at the back of my head, a dull, deep thumping that was vibrating down my spine. My eyes were moving around slowly under my eyelids, searching for anything, but my eyelids seemed almost glued... show more Can You Please Read This and Tell Me What You Think?
I could hear something, I’m pretty sure I could. It was like thumping at the back of my head, a dull, deep thumping that was vibrating down my spine. My eyes were moving around slowly under my eyelids, searching for anything, but my eyelids seemed almost glued shut.
I couldn't’t open my mouth and take a sweet breath because there was something cold shoved down my throat, I could feel the air pumping in and out of my lungs, but not naturally… I tried to breathe and started to gag, my chest felt like it was being pulled apart from the inside, the pressure building up. I tried to breathe again, but I couldn’t, my lungs were freezing up, my lips were chapping, and my eyes spinning around in their sockets.
Then, something snapped and everything got better. My eyes snapped open, only to clamp shut again against the bright light. My ears opened up with a pop when I swallowed and I could hear the wailing sirens all around me. My lungs took in a deep breath; the antiseptic smell filling my nose. I coughed, a thick liquid bubbling up my throat.
Voices swirled around me, deep, raspy ones and shrill, loud ones lingered in my mind.
“B-B-B-” I could hear vague gibberish floating by my head, which eventually chained together with some other recognizable words to form letters that I could understand… “Brianna-Brianna-Brianna-,” The voices mixed and merged together, becoming more and more thick, their voices slurring… that’s when I fell asleep again, this time peacefully…

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I rolled my eyes around in my head carefully, and then batted them open, expecting another intense light; and yet: I saw nothing. Everything was dark. My heart froze in place. Was I blind?
I reached my frail arms up to touch my face, but they were strapped down by thick blankets, layer after layer of cottony throw… the cottony fluff could have been steel bars just as well because my arms were trembling and weak.
I looked around, still seeing blackness. Finally, my eyes came across something bright and shiny in the middle of the room, just floating. I peeked at it carefully and reached for it, but it seemed so distant and unreachable…
I breathed a sigh in relief as my hand swooped past it and covered it; I was not blind… was I dead? Was I seeing the very light that would walk me up to Heaven?
No. I wasn’t.
Not.
Even.
Close.

OKAY. That can either be:
a.) the Prologue
OR
b.) the 1st Chapter
What do u think? Comment for me! ty! also leave me some suggestions, like better synonyms to use or something, I mean, I use the online thesaurus and stuff... but anyways... thank youu!
3 answers 3