My parents had conflicting ideas of what were appropriate gender roles for girls/women, as my father was more a product of growing up in the 30's/40's and my mom grew up in the 40's/50's. My dad was pretty traditional, being a missionary-type minister, but he and my mom also wanted all of his kids to do well in school, disliked sports, thought we should all have a way to support ourselves, and thought we should all do house chores, and all camp, hike and fish. My dad could care less about clothes and how we looked. My mom was obsessed with my being a little lady, when I was a notorious tom-boy. My mom had to keep my hair short since I kept putting gum in it. I cried when my mom told me I had to wear a shirt in the summer, because I was a woman (at age 9!). I didn't think much of being a woman, and it didn't get much better, there were always so many rules. But since my brothers had many silly rules too, it didn't seem unfair, just ridiculous.
My mother did want me to get an education, so I could support myself if my husband became disabled or died, but I was expected by both parents to marry a Christian man, have children and be a homemaker. If I did get a job for a bit, it was suppose to be a parochial teacher or nurse. My mother was a nurse. Ironically, after all of these fairly rigid gender role expectations, my mother went to work part-time when I was 10, when my brothers and sister were younger than I, and she continued to work the rest of her life, full-time when my youngest sibling was in high school. I did notice the message she was sending me, when she said she couldn't stand staying home and hated being broke. We probably were able to go to college and my parents probably have a decent retirement because she went back to work, but that wasn't the traditional message they also tried to guilt trip me with.
When my mother went back to work when I was 10, my dad fought with my mother about it. He felt he'd failed to provide for the family, and it was true, from his point of view. He took it out on his kids, especially me at first, but later he beat my brothers a great deal as well. He also started drinking, so did my mother. The final message I got was: don't be dependent on anyone financially, whether male or female, get an education, and be careful who you marry, if you marry, there's no guarantees. I also got the message that having lots of kids could be a huge burden to people who emotionally and/or financially, can't handle the responsibility and problems associated with a large family. I don't think these were the messages my parents meant for me to get, but my brothers pretty much got the same message as well.