Advice needed: Neighborhood being terrorized by attack porcupines...?

It so happens that there used to be an illegal porcupine-fighting ring in our neighborhood--you know, the kind where people bring their attack porcupines and fight them against each other, and everyone places bets--and the police came in and broke it up. We were shocked to find out something like this had been... show more It so happens that there used to be an illegal porcupine-fighting ring in our neighborhood--you know, the kind where people bring their attack porcupines and fight them against each other, and everyone places bets--and the police came in and broke it up. We were shocked to find out something like this had been going on in our neighborhood; we had no clue!

Anyway, the police didn't manage to clear out all of the porcupines, and there is an aggressive pair left behind making life hell for us. Since they no longer have to fight each other, they have joined forces to attack the humans they have grown to hate. They curl themselves into balls and hurl themselves with great force at you, and if you aren't fast, you will suffer!

The other evening my wife and I were out for a walk when we were attacked. I got away, but ended up having to visit my wife in the hospital, where they removed 174 quills from her. She had been pricked. She had been pricked good!

What should we do?
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