Advice needed; my new neighbors have a cow...?
First of all, I noticed the cow had this strange mark, looking almost like it was burned into its skin on its hindquarter, sort of like a "q" & a "j" dancing together. Now, I'm no fool, I know gang tattoos when I see them! I also overheard my neighbors talking about the cow spending time "in the pen", so I have no doubt that it has done hard time.
Also, that cow brazenly wears this big, clunky brass thing around its neck that makes a clang-clang noise when it walks---talk about some serious gangsta-bling! I am filled with fear every time I hear that thing clanging. And get this: Every morning, the neighbor's daughter carries a pail into the little prefab barn they have put on their property, spends some time in there with the cow, then carries the pail back into the house! What in the world could be going on???? I suspect some sort of drug running, and my suspicions were more or less confirmed when I saw them unloading some huge tied-up squares of stuff that looked like dried weeds, and piling it in that barn. It has to be some pretty high grade ganja, but I can't imagine why it comes in such big bales! They just hoist it off the truck, holding it by the strings it is tied with, in broad daylight...talk about brash!
The biggest scare happened when I woke up one morning to find the cow munching on some bushes outside my living room window. I called my neighbors and told them the cow was in our yard, and they gave some likely story about their daughter accidentally leaving the gate open, but I suspect the cow came over to case the joint! I am so nervous about this, I can't eat or sleep. This is just tearing me up!
What can I do? Has anyone else had experience with a hardcore gangsta cow?
Just so you know, other sites take questions from Answers and post them; I most certainly am the sole author of all of my own writing, and you are way out of line. I know you don't believe me, so I looked up some of YOUR posted questions that are also on other sites. Now, you mean to tell me that this doesn't happen? Take a look:
You owe me and everyone else on here a BIG APOLOGY.