Should I tell my parents I converted to Islam?

I converted to Islam about three weeks ago. At first I was really scared to tell them and I planned to wait until I'm in college or at least for a few months so I could slowly start talking to them about Islam so that when I do tell them it won't be as big of a shock. (I was advised by my Muslim friends to do this)

However, lately its been hard to keep it a secret. I hate feeling like I'm lying to everyone. I've been trying to get out of church as often as I can, but when I do have to go its really awkward. My parents hate Islam and whenever they talk negatively about it is really hard to limit how much I defend it without giving too much away.

I love my parents and I don't want to hurt them. I will be 18 in September and am a junior in high school.

Update:

Brande, I converted because I believe it is the truth. There are many contradictions in the Bible and many things that simply don't make sense. Islam is more logical and more scientifically accurate.

Update 2:

I suppose I should have included more details of why I converted so I wouldn't sound like an idiot. I studied Islam and the Bible for months before making this decision. I researched and tested arguments by Christians and Muslims. I studied the history behind both religions. After doing this I concluded that Islam is the truth.

21 Answers

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  • 10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Salaam alaykum.

    I can see how that would be difficult. If there's no chance of them kicking you out, it might be a good idea to tell them sometime soon. That way, it won't feel like you're living a lie or a double life. According to Islam, we must obey and be good to our parents but if what they want from us or tell us to do might prevent us from obeying God, we must not listen. I understand you don't want to hurt your parents but I don't believe you're doing something wrong by telling them. You would be telling them the truth, which is something we should always do. The benefits of doing so is that you won't have to pretend to be someone you're not, the downside is that it may cause tension and some difficult conversations. It will be hard. I'm going through a similar thing (but not with religion) that I have to tell my parents and I know it will kill them. :( God willing, I hope things work out for both of us.

    It's good that you have some Muslim friends to help you with things but if you ever need anonymous advice, feel free to message me. :)

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  • 10 years ago

    I'm confused as to why you converted in the first place. I wish you had included it in your explanation.

    But I won't hold that against you.

    Anyway, answering your question, you should try make them like islam first. Show them that the media lies. If they hate Islam then they will feel as though you have betrayed their religion. If you show them how similar Islam is to Christianity then they'll feel better. Do some research and find websites on the good side of Islam.

    I'm a muslim, and I find life very difficult because of this. People look at me differently.

    However, I can tell you haven't thought this through. Is it all really worth it? Are you sure you want to risk all this?

    Well, obviously you do. I wish you luck

    Sorry if I've seemed a bit anti-muslim

    :D

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  • 10 years ago

    CONGRATULATIONS !

    u got the perfect way in life and the paradise forever en shaa Allah :)

    about ur parents, u should care to make them convert to as long as u love them, one day u too hated islam , and this was when u were having wrong ideas about this peaceful religion,now, and as a muslim, u should start showing them the reality of islam (sure in an indirect way) and watch their reactions from a distance, don't rush and tell them now about ur conversion, it might bring their violent reaction instead of trying to understand u y converted . when it comes to religion ppl are really violent.

    if u did ur best with them and u r sure at the end that there is no way out that they also convert, u can keep it as a secret between u and Allah. this is not considered as a "lie" it is something personal, and u have the free will to choose, if u can run away do it (if only u r a boy)

    this link may help u in Islamic issues, u will need it

    http://discover.islamway.com/bindex.php?section=al...

    finally , i wanna congratulate u again for ur GREAT decision, all muslims are proud of u :)

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  • 10 years ago

    Hmmm well this is a tough one, I advise the same, talk to your parents about Islam as much as possible so it doesn't make it that much of a shock to them, they will probably think your going through a phase as many parents of reverts think.

    Pray to the Lord to help you through all of this, and somehow make it come out without it being too much of a hassle (I don't know if I spelt that right). Yeah so praying to the Lord sounds best. && I know how it is to keep secrets from your family, it stinks!! My mom gets bugged if I talk about other religions too, she just says to leave them to what they have and just stick to your own, but I love researching, I like reading all the books that have been sent by the Lord, to see the differences and such....you know.

    But anways just ask the Lord for some guidance with it and He'll get you through it Inshallah.

    && BTW congratulations. May Allah keep you on His path. Ameen.

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  • 10 years ago

    I think you are still young, just practice Islam, but maybe tell them when you are in college, but your mission now is to show them how islam changed you...how it affects your life:), I have a polish friend (my brother's fiancee to be)who converted about 1 and half year ago, and she is 19 so she is waiting till college, I guess my brother will ask her parents marry her soon after entering college, and then she will tell her parents that she converted

    Source(s): A Muslim revert knowing another muslim revert too:)
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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    I feel so sorry for you. You are really misguided.

    You also are full of deceit. You studied Islam without your parents approval knowing that they would not like it.

    Shame on you! You do not honor your parents. You dishonor them.

    But Islam welcomes you? Says alot about the company you have joined.

    Are you going to be a bomb? You are really misguided. I bet the people who converted you could talk you into being a human bomb. You are really misguided.

    • Anna
      Lv 5
      3 years agoReport

      Jeff, just because this person converted to Islam, doesn't mean she'll become a suicide bomber. I'm a Christian, but Islam IS a peaceful religion. ISIS are extreme terrorists that don't represent Islam and God will send them to hell when they die.

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  • Witch
    Lv 6
    10 years ago

    I converted a month ago and have Christian parents. When I told them they were very upset. They haven't punished me, but they have tried to get other people involved to try to get me to change my mind. They aren't very accommodating and don't hesitate to make pork for dinner. But it wasn't really that bad of an experience. I think you should tell them, especially since you seem to want to.

    Source(s): Muslim convert
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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    While the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) was delighted with Sa’d's acceptance of Islam, others including his mother were not. Sa’d may Allaah be pleased with him relates: "When my mother heard the news of my acceptance of Islam, she flew into a rage. She came up to me and said: "'O Sa'd ! What is this religion that you have embraced, which has taken you away from the religion of your mother and father? By God, either you forsake your new religion, or I would not eat or drink until I die. Your heart would be broken with grief for me, and remorse would consume you on account of the deed which you have done, and people would censure you forever more.' "‘Do not do (such a thing), my mother,' I said, 'for I would not give up my religion for anything.' "

    However, she went on with her threat. For days, she neither ate nor drank and became emaciated and weak. Hour after hour, I went to her asking whether I should bring her some food or something to drink, but she persistently refused, insisting that she would neither eat nor drink until she died or I abandoned my religion. I said to her: "'Yaa Ummah! (O mother) In spite of my strong love for you, my love for Allaah and His Messenger , is indeed stronger. By Allaah, if you had a thousand souls and one soul after another were to depart, I would not abandon my religion for anything.'

    When she saw that I was determined she relented unwillingly and ate and drank."

    It was concerning Sa'd 's relationship with his mother and her attempt to force him to renounce his faith that the words of the

    Quran were revealed (which mean):

    "And We have enjoined upon man (care) for his parents. His mother carried him, (increasing her) in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the (final) destination. But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in (this) world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to me (in repentance). Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do." [Quran 31:14-15]

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  • ?
    Lv 6
    10 years ago

    peace be upon u

    welcome dear in islam

    i am soooooooooo happy for u

    may ALLAH help u and give u the strength in faith

    do not worry dear

    all new muslims like u especially girls and everything become ok after that

    i hope these links help u

    She became Muslim and was cut off by her non-Muslim mother

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/2644

    If he announces his Islam they will not give him a job; can he conceal his faith?

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/8593

    She is thinking of becoming Muslim, and is asking how she could perform the prayers at school

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/9455

    A Muslim whose kaafir family are threatening to hang him because of his being Muslim

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/27302

    Difficulties facing a Christian girl who wants to take the decision to enter Islam

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/3313

    Wants to accept Islam but fears for her mother's health

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/758

    She wants to become Muslim but her mother and grandmother are opposed to the idea

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/31796

    How should a Muslim deal with his kaafir family?

    http://islamqa.com/en/ref/112006

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  • ???
    Lv 6
    10 years ago

    Tell them. Whether a Christian or Muslim I suspect you should honour your parents

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