Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdoption · 10 years ago

Adoptees, have you been called "angry" and if so, why do you think that is?

Are you really angry?

Who are you angry at?

Who do you blame for your anger?

Is it really anger or something else?

Have you gotten professional help for this anger?

17 Answers

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  • 10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    "Adoptees, have you been called 'angry'?"

    Yes.

    "Why do you think that is?"

    [1] People assume to much.

    [2] People misinterpret my responses.

    [3] Judgmental

    "Are you really angry?"

    Yes/No. I'm feeling a number of emotions

    "Who are you angry at?"

    Gravity. Bankers, Ford, Hollywood, Telstra, Supporters of Internet Censorship, Government, Do-gooders, Rightwingers, Leftwingers, Centrists, the World, the Universe.

    "Who do you blame for your anger?"

    Me, Myself and I when it comes to any emotions.

    "Is it really anger or something else?"

    Like with any negative emotion. Some unresolved issue from my past.

    "Have you gotten professional help for this anger?"

    No need too.

    Being able to show emotions is healthy. Hiding, denying, limiting

    your emotions is of no help to anyone.

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  • 10 years ago

    Why Do You Think That Is? Simply Because I Can Never Find "Equality" As An Adoptee!

    Are you really angry? Sometimes More Than Others, Yes I'm Angry!

    Who are you angry at? The World, Pro-Lifers, The Pope, Cheaters & Users!

    Who do you blame for your anger? Society, Government, & Myself!

    Is it really anger or something else? Mmmmm, Maybe Satan? Naw, Just Good Old Anger!

    Have you gotten professional help for this anger? "The World Is Full Of Kings & Queens, Who Will Blind Your Eyes & Steal Your Dreams. They'll Tell You Black Is Really White, & The Moon Is Just The Sun At Night. It's Heaven & Hell !"

    Written By Ozzy Osbourne

    Source(s): United Brotherhood Of Adoptees w/o A Cause, Local #86
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  • Anonymous
    4 years ago

    I personally prefer the term ADOPTEE. I have never thought twice about it. The term "adopted person" just sounds.... well... kinda weird to me. Everyone has their own personal views as to why they want to be called either or and no matter how you say it, somebody out there will be offended one way or another. Adoption and some of the subjects that go along with it are no doubt, VERY, VERY DELICATE SUBJECTS. But at the same time, some are, I feel, a little hypersensitive when it comes to this subject. I guess perhaps due to their life experiences. I don't feel that either label is less validating, one is just more direct and to the point.

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  • 小黃
    Lv 4
    10 years ago

    Adoptees, have you been called "angry" and if so, why do you think that is?

    Yep. Because I pointed out the loss aspect.

    Are you really angry?

    Sometimes.

    Who are you angry at?

    My agency, my biological parents, and to some extent (even though it is not "factually" their fault), my adoptive parents. It's a long story. -_-

    Who do you blame for your anger?

    Everyone who thought it was "okay" to give me up due to medical expenses without offering my biological parents a chance to compensate raising me.

    Is it really anger or something else?

    It's anger, it's confusion, it's appreciation for the life I have given, it's grief for the life I would have had (the life that my bio parents INTENDED to raise me in)... it's a whole mix of things. I'd say more often than not it's sadness rather than anger.

    Have you gotten professional help for this anger?

    Professional help assists one in identifying anger. It doesn't cure it if the solution for the anger leads back to a choice that cannot be undone.

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  • 10 years ago

    Yes!!!!!! I have been told on multiple occasions that i have anger issues! Yes i am angry and yes its anger that I have inside ! I'm angry I was given away by my birth mother, I'm angry I don't know who my birth parents are or what they look like, I'm angry I don't know who I am or where I came from! I'm angry because I've been searching for my birth parents for the last 12 years without any luck! I could go on and on for days about this, but to get back to your question , yeah, it's mostly anger I have ! anger and hurt! I was adopted shortly after I was born, My adopted Mom died in front of me 4 months before my 17th birthday , 2 months after my adopted mom died , my adopted dad started dating a new woman with a 5 yr old child , a month later I was kicked out of the house to fend for myself! Since then all of my adopted family has past away! uncles, aunts, grandparents....etc... All that is left is my adopted dad. I look after him only because there is no one else to do so. So here I am , a 36 yr old male with no family what so ever! Once again I am a orphan! What did being adopted do for me? Not a damn thing! Do you kind of understand why I am so angry now? You hear alot of birth parents say we gave you up because we wanted you to have a better life ! News Flash! My life wasn't better! It sucked! I have nothing but anger and hate inside my heart! I cannot or will not trust anyone but myself. I will not allow anyone to get close to me! Every time someone tries to get close to me I push them away ! I;m not happy, I don't know what that word means! fair or not I blame all of this on my birth mother ! She would of done me a big favor if she would of just aborted me insted of me living this sad , pathetic life! As far as getting professional help for my anger...... Why bother? Why pay someone to tell me that I have anger issues? What's the point. Some people were never ment to be born! I do think that if my birth mother kept me maybe I would of had a better life Anything would of been better than this. I hope I answered your question..

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  • 10 years ago

    im adopted and yes i have been called angry i never new why i was angry. I think it was because i didnt know the truth and wasnt able to do what i wanted. i was really angry not really any more i was angry at my adopted parents i blame myself for my anger it might be something else and yes i have had "professional help" but nothing worked everything seemed to just make everything worse. IDK why

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  • 10 years ago

    Yes I was angry for a time. Angry at the circumstances of my having to be given up, angry with y birth mother for giving me up but more for her lies and deceit to make herself look good.

    Angry that I had not been raised in the country of my birth.

    I did seek help and worked through it all......big long story on the discoveries made when tracing birth family......but am in an ok place now. Content as I am ever going to be and cannot change anything so live with it all happily enough I suppose, now that is after a bit of a journey.

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  • 10 years ago

    Not until the past few years, when I started speaking up.

    Up until a few years ago, even people who knew me very well would consider me a "happy adoptee". At an awards benefit at work, I was introduced as "the happiest person in the company"

    But I was very angry. I just didn't believe I had a right to talk about it.

    I'm angry at archaic, outdated laws that prevent me from having my own birth certificate. I'm angry that any file clerk at Vital Records can see my personal information, but I'm not allowed to have it.

    As far as blame, I blame myself for not getting politically active earlier in life.

    I don't need professional help for my anger. I need to be treated like the nonadopted, and have access to my original birth certificate.

    Source(s): Angry adoptee
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  • 10 years ago

    Are you really angry? Yes.

    Who are you angry at? I am angry with anyone who helps adoption thrive in its current state.

    Who do you blame for your anger? Those who are allowing adoption and trafficking to continue as though there were no problems with it.

    Is it really anger or something else? Anger, sadness, the feeling of helplessness, because I cannot do anything to change it... at least not on my own.

    Have you gotten professional help for this anger? For THIS anger? No. I have gotten help for other areas of my life. Most of the people I've spoken with are pretty dismissive about the issues I'm concerned about.

    Source(s): adoptee, mother of 5
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  • kitta
    Lv 5
    10 years ago

    Adoption was and is filled with crime, and parents and their babies were the victims. My SIL was also among the "adoption un-dead"..she was taken from Quebec to NY,where she grew up.

    I helped her find her French-Canadian family a few years ago..how astonished they were to see her as they had been told about her as the "baby who died."

    These stories were written up in the NY times at the time when babies were being funneled from Quebec to the NY area. many parents were told their children were dead. There were several huge baby rings.Lawyers catered to an infertile clientele.

    We have lived through this and are here to talk about it, and we won't shut up.

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