Why when trans women ask if they are "passable" when you tell the truth they get pissed?

There was this trans girl on youtube (AshleeTorin) who made a video blatantly asking if she was "passable" or not, and when a group of people were just being honest(not trying to offend her) but just being honest, she got all pissed off and stuff and calling people jealous. (All I said was that she was overall really passable, but when she looked to the side she had a big browbone, there was no way to be polite about it but she asked the viewers to judge anyway)

so then she blocked me. lol...

and then there was this other chick on youtube (msParisxoxoable) who was asking if she was passable. and I had to be honest and she wanted people's help too. so I gave my opinion, and I come back later to find that my comment was deleted and the only comments she left on her video were saying "You're totally passable!" when in reality she looks like a neanderthal with a wig(lets be REAL here)..

I never ever judge trans women unless they ask, but i guess i just learned a lesson. if a trans person asks how passable they are, NEVER am I going to respond. I think that's so stupid though because if I was to ask how passable I was, I would want the brutal, honest, blatant truth, so I know how I can improve my look w/ surgery. but thats horrible how if they ask you something and you give them the truth they will just say you're jealous or get pissed off.

but why do they do that???

7 Answers

  • Favorite Answer

    How many young girls do you know who aren't self-conscious about their looks? Do you think transsexual girls are going to be any different? Heck, even adult women get miffed when you are critical.

    People who fish for complements about their looks, whether young or old, are superficial and insecure. Most transsexual women have legitimate concerns about being accepted as women in society, but whether we are or we aren't means nothing, because you can NEVER KNOW if a person is seeing you as a female, or knows you are transsexual and is just being polite. It's a odd sort of duality we have, because on the one hand we do care that people see us as ordinary women, but at the same time we can't worry all the time whether people accept us if we want to stay sane. In the end, you learn so care about the opinions of the people who matter to you, and forget about the rest, which is really no different than how everyone goes through life.

    Why are you worried about being "blocked" or liked by these people anyway?

  • 5 years ago

    Nice rant there. Being humble doesn't serve most women, attractive or not. In regards to your women in the workplace rant, if you're coming from the perspective of management, you need to reevaluate your skills. You sound pretty excited at the prospect of women lining up at the strip clubs or becoming homeless with their children. Perhaps we'll meet your mother/sister/aunt there. You don't have to sugar coat anything, sweetness. Just put on your big boy pants and let us have it!

  • 1 decade ago

    Damn, when women ask for your "honest opinion" they never actually want it. They want reassurance and reaffirmation, not judgement. What those videos are really asking is for you to "tell me I'm passable!" It's like those teen girls that post on here asking if they're pretty. And the stereotypical "does this dress make me look fat?" question.

    Source(s): I'm a woman.
  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    Well 'questioner,' I am a fellow follower of the former account of Ms. Ashlee Torin, and I know *exactly* who you are. You are the hateful, neaderthal looking transexual who trolled this poor girl and caused her to give up on helping people who felt like her and did NOT identify with other transexuals who were 'proud trannies' as they claimed during their hayday of eff'ing with this poor gal.

    Now, there's no way to prove it as she's completely disappeared from the interwebs, however, she was very pretty, and I say that with a pang of guilt in my own admission. I too hated her, but I was young and dumb. I actually stumbled on this old post because I occasionally search for her, hoping she returns, but to no avail.

    That said, and I know you claim to disagree, but your critique, like my own of hers back in 2009/2010, is HEAVILY rooted in projection. You clearly, if truly felt she was not passable and *just* making a passing point as you claim, would not make it so clear that she is 'ugly' 'mannish' 'looks like a neaderthal,' etc. The old saying is 'I think the lady doth protest too much' and either you are:

    A: another transexual, jelly of the girl you so sought to mock with this post (I'd know, I was enrolled in the jelly school over her back then too, though now in a much LESS toxic place myself and I hope the same for you.)


    B: a dude she scorned by NOT showing attention to (another pretense that never made sense as it seems men think a transexual woman CANT be picky, and they should just be happy a man 'settles' for us.)

    Either way, you probably won't read this and I feel, if anything, I am typing this as penance for the evil comments I sent to her both Public and in PM because I wanted her to feel like I did; cheated, jealous and hopeless. As I stated before, if you are a fellow trans person, focus on YOU. Ashlee was the prettiest transexual I ever saw and back then she had extremely short hair (from what I recall) and had barely entered transition beyond 6 months, and she STILL appeared PRETTIER than most women I've known here locally in Indiana.

    Also, the girl had shorter hair than most guys today in her videos so right there alone, your comment of 'neanderthal in a wig' is baseless and shows you were either watching a totes Different youtube personality or you're just a spiteful person who would sooner drag others down without any base to your claims rather than work on fixing what you consider broken within yourself.

    She was passable, I imagine now she's prob one of the hottest girls in her area and (as a lesbian) I was quite bummed when she claimed she likes men. Oh well, point is UMAD, get over yourself and stop projecting your own dissatisfaction with yourself onto someone else; its like a fat woman claiming Jessica Alba is tubby; projection is not a good look on you m'dear.

    ~Regina Mae

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    The problem is that you like being brutal, there is a difference between being mean and being honest. Being mean you get joy out of other peoples pain and that is not fair, it only hurts them more. You should always temper your comments with some sort of kindness.

  • 1 decade ago

    You don't tell a woman her butt is big in that dress, and you don't tell a transboi his **** are showing. It's just the law of nature. They don't want the truth, they want their version of a lie that you're getting ensnared into. Good luck. Next time, just hush.

  • Wasabi
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    When people ask you for "your" opinion, it ALWAYS has to be positive in favor of the inquirer.

    Don't you know that?

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