I am 18 and pregnant, have no job, money, and parents are struggling? Please help me!?

My mom lost her job and my dad doesnt make much at all, my mom was the main income, my dads paycheck just covers the mortgage and a couple of the bills.

I live with my parents, we have a pretty big house so the baby would have his/her own room.

I am 12weeks pregnant, I have been trying to get a job for over a year(I am in no way picky I apply for any and every job opening I come across), I dont know who the father is, I was raped, I am dealing better and better everyday.

I am not in school right now (dont have ANY money to pay for it), I dont have a car, or Health insurance, or job, or money to buy any baby stuff, and I would hate to be one of those teen moms who intend on living on welfare, but What else can I do to support my baby?

I dont have any health insurance because I am not in college and I don't have any money for college, and I dont have money to buy baby stuff, I have little friends and dont have money to throw a baby shower(hate to throw one just to get gifts)

So What do I do???

abortion and adoption isnt an option!

Please check back after you answer because I might have questions about your answers PLEASE AND THANK YOU!

Update:

A friend of mine who had her baby when she was 14! her baby's father mother bought her all the baby stuff which came to around 4 grand!

Update 2:

Thank I will check with Medicad....But I was raped when my friends and I went to Jamaica.

Update 3:

Shara- I have been applying at the 6 McDonalds near my house, I am not picky at all as long as I have a job is all that matters!...I have been looking over craigslist in my area and cribs ar $175 and up the free ones are missing pieces or the recalled cribs.

Update 4:

ab c- Abortion is in no way an option, it is murder I am dead set against it and so is my family! I have my HS diploma I graduated on time with a 3.90GPA

Also my parents are tied to this house when they had it built my mom made really really good money.

Even though I was raped I still love this baby unconditionally so I am keeping this baby.

18 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    To keep a child that is the product of rape must have been a very difficult decision to make. Make sure you have a lot of support in place as there may be a lot of unexpected emotions pop up try joining a local support group or seek counseling if you have not already. If you have not already reported it to police consider doing so if they find the father not only will he be off the street but he will also be forced to pay child support which will help you out a little.

    There are a lot of things that a baby needs but these things do not need to be expensive just clean and safe. Try looking for things at op-shops/ebay but make sure they are up to your countries basic safety standards i.e. distance between cot bars, sleep ware made from fire retardant materials. Your mum should have a lot of helpful ideas A cheap brightly coloured toy from the op-shop means just as much to a baby as the latest 'mummy must have' for $20 at the toy store.

    Unfortunately you have been looking for work for a year and now are pregnant that will make it next to impossible to get a job forget all the anti-discrimination stuff they will discriminate and it will be impossible to prove. You best bet would be to swallow your pride and accept the welfare for the sake of your child. This does not mean you will be on it forever nor should you expect to be but it was created for a reason and you now find yourself in the position of needing it however use your time on it to do whatever you need to to improve your chances of getting a job in the future go back and finish high school if you have not already if you have find out more about a job you would want and find out what you need to get it.

    It won't be easy but nothing worthwhile ever is Good Luck

  • 1 decade ago

    You need to do what is in the best interested of the child and if that is living off welfare, you need to stop worrying about "being one of those teen moms" and do the best thing possible. I'm sure everything will work out for you but you need to find a job right now and save money. If not, use the funds from the government. If you are as poor as you say the government should pay for your schooling and you should be eligible for financial aid. You should start taking online courses that way you can finish school after the baby is born as well. I would take ANY job right now and go to Hotjobs to start looking. Go to every single fast food place and fill out an application. Think about the baby first. You can do anything pregnant.

    You also need to do all you can to investigate this crime. What are the police doing about this? Have they been looking into it? What state are you in because things don't seem right where you are living.

  • Shara
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    More than just applying for job openings, try to take something minimum wage if that's all you can get. McDonalds is ALWAYS hiring pretty much. I know the work sucks, but you need to start saving for the baby, and once your pregnancy gets more noticeable (it's gonna happen really soon!) You'll have an even harder time getting a job!

    As far as getting baby stuff, I wouldn't worry about that just now. I'm starting from square one too (my lil' girl is due in 2 months), not getting a shower either. I found her crib and other big items used on craigslist REALLY cheap. I plan on getting her clothes used on ebay. Do a search on baby clothes lot, and you'll find some great deals on used clothes. Baby's really grow fast, so most lots are in great condition. It's awesome that your parents are being so supportive and letting you stay in their house, but you guys are going to need your own space soon. Take your FAFSA. Hopefully you'll qualify for PELL or other grants. If you work hard, in 4 years, maybe you'll be ready to get out of the house. I would stay near my family if I had the option though... being a single mom, it's got to be GREAT to have family around that you'd trust to watch your baby.

    You can do this! Good luck :-)

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    How old are you? And yes we want to help even though we do not approve of the situation we had hoped we had raised you better to wait to have kids until you are old enough to take care of them yourself but should it happen anyway we try to instill the parenting skills in you so you can do your best not us. Grandparents are just that.....grandparents. We did not choose to have more children you did therefore ultimately it's on you to provide for your children. We may support your decisions honey but we certainly are not "required or obligated" to provide you a living. That is YOUR job and if you can't do it for yourself yet you really shouldn't be thinking about bringing a new life into this world and making it someone elses job to care for them financially when you can't. I am proud to say that I have 3 adult children that have put their lives first and 1 is in college 1 is entering college in the spring and 1 is just now settling down in life and planning a future and I have 2 younger children I hope we raise well enough to know that you do not start a family until you are able to at least able to stand on your own two feet as we did with the older 3.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Wow the person above me has some serious issues he obviously didn't read the whole question and the details after!

    Dont listen to him YA! is full of disturbed trolls like that, but you need to find a WIC office in your area they can help you so much!

    A friend of mine was in the same position as you....I threw he baby shower....but WIC helped her with health care for her and her daughter before and after she was born and another assistance office helped her find a job.

    But I am so sorry you were violated like that I couldn't imagine what you were going through when it happened and after you found out you are carrying a child from it.....I will be praying for you!

    But keep your head up....I do applaud you for not getting pregnant at 13 or 14, as when I was in high school more freshman were getting pregnant than any other grade girls put together in my school.

    But again I am so sorry what happened to you.......If you need someone your age to talk to I am here message me anytime believe it or not I have 2-god sons and 2 god-daughters, allot of my friends are teen moms and whenever they need a free babysitter or someone to talk to they unload on me.

    Btu I am always here if you want to talk!

  • 1 decade ago

    I hope this doesn't sound awful, but one of the good things about being a young single mom, the government will pay for almost everything you need right now. They don't want you to be dependent forever, and they will help you get on your feet. Im not even single and I get grants that cover all of my college expenses and then some(last semester I had a couple hundred dollars AFTER they paid my tuition, fees and books!)

    Go to your local family services office, they can point you in the right direction for wic, medicaid, childcare, work, and school.

    Good Luck

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Why can't you choose between getting an abortion or giving the baby up for adoption? You don't have money or an education. The baby will be better off in foster care or in heaven. I would prefer an abortion. Just get it over with. You can always have another baby.

    Please put your ideological and religious convictions aside and think about the baby. You are ill equipped to handle the situation. Your expenses will be in excess of $200,000 to raise the kid till age eighteen. Can you afford that much? Perhaps, moving to a smaller home could be an option? Giving the baby his/her own room is a luxury you can't afford. I feel bad that you were raped but you have to face reality.

    Source(s): me
  • 1 decade ago

    DO NOT ABORT

    (if this story is true)

    I'm sorry, that's horible,

    well I'm also sorry to tell you that u have to think of what good for the baby and in this case I think adoption is best for the baby. You can still get updates on him/her if it's not a closed adoption and on day even meet him/her.

  • 1 decade ago

    check to see if u qualify for medicare, which im more than sure u will, that will cover ur medical bills while pregnant and ur babys after he/she is born!

    welfare isnt alwasy a bad thing, as long as you dont abuse it...right now you need all the help you can get and i would recommend it, till you get on your feet!

    best thing to do is find a social worker, they will be able to help you with all your needs, that way you dont have to stress over what you need to fill out or where to go to get it! they will have everything for you and will guide you in the rite way!!!! hope this helps!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    best of luck!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • ?
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    first of all, go apply for medicaid. they will cover all pregnancy related expenses. you need prenatal care to ensure your baby is healthy.

    second, there are numerous government and local programs that are there to help you out.

    you should go apply for WIC as soon as possible, you get it throughout pregnancy as well as after the baby is born. with that you get milk, bread, cheese, etc. it helps out A LOT.

    plus at the WIC office, they should give you a print out of all the local programs available to help you.

    hope everything goes well.

    good luck

    edit: you may also qualify for food stamps. when you go to apply for medicaid, ask them what other benefits you are eligible for.

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