Almost done with essay, can someone help me add to it a little?

It should be at least 500 words, but I came up a little short...overall, I think I did well, I just need a little more information to incorporate into it...It's an essay against smoking/tobacco..Can you think of any relevant information I could place into it?....This is what I have so far:

Why would anyone ever want to smoke? Some may see it as a way to escape from the stress of everyday life. The media says you can be beautiful, youthful, independent, and confident. And of course, "Everybody does it." That all sounds pretty nice and convincing so why would anybody not want to smoke?

The reality is, smoking can lead to severe, and even fatal, diseases later on in life.

Just a few of which are; emphysema, strokes, heart diseases, cancers of the throat, mouth, and lungs, and peripheral artery disease. Children of smokers have a greater chance of developing asthma and other respiratory illnesses, than children of nonsmokers. Many non smokers are still at risk of developing diseases/medical problems due to second hand smoke.

Because of the risks to non-smokers, statewide bans prohibit smoking in many

public places. There are exceptions, though, for casinos, private clubs, cigar bars, and

even some small workplaces. Some states have hotels/motels that compromised by

designating some of the rooms to smokers.

Sadly, many smokers really, truly want to quit, but can't because of the addiction

to nicotine. There are treatment centers for smokers, but 33.3% of smokers are living

below poverty level - they can barely afford their cigarettes, much less treatment for

quitting.

What's more sad than the simple fact that people smoke, is the emotional and

physical struggle these people go through, and the heart ach they put their families

through. But worst of all, is when a person can't give up smoking until they give up their

life.

Now, why would anyone ever want to smoke?

(my actual essay is tabbed at the beginning of paragraphs and the sentences are double spaced....It's just not coming up how I want it to on here..)

...Feel free to point out any typos...

Thanks :)

Update:

haha oops...I meant 'ache'...thanks :)

4 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Two things you should exclude from essays: questions and contractions. You should rephrase your questions into statements. (Why would anyone ever want to smoke? ---> It is baffling that anyone would choose to smoke tobacco.) Then separate those contractions into two words. (Can't ---> Can not or Cannot *both forms are acceptable, just not the contracted form) The good news is: these changes will make your paper slightly longer!

    Maybe point out that the exceptions to smoking bans are made for economic reasons. Smoking bans would cause the businesses mentioned to lose money, because their customers demand a smoke-friendly environment.

    ache instead of ach

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Your essay is 266 words to be exact

    Why you should not smoke

    I believe that people should not smoke. There are several good Health, Environmental, Financial and Appearance reasons. Smoking is bad for your health and has several ways of killing you or severely harming you. Firstly, smokers have a higher risk of getting lung cancer, strokes or other illnesses that can kill you. For example, every year, around 114,000 smokers in the UK die as a result of their bad habit. Secondly, smoking is an addictive drug, meaning that when you start it is hard to stop. For instance, only 2.5% of smokers successfully quit smoking each year. Thirdly, smoking also affects the people you frequent. Passive smokers can get disturbances such as eye irritations, coughs, nausea or sore throats. Another example is that just 30 minute's exposure to smoke is enough to reduce the coronary blood flow.

    Together they make 403 words

    - ♡pUpPy♡

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    try a better introduction like: smoking is proven to be bad but bla bla bla. and make people think. then do health in one paragraph. smokers pov in another. then the indusries

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I believe you would spell it ache and not ach..... and I'm sorry but I can't thing of anything you can add

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.