Is this a strongly written professional resume? any feedback is fine?

Rebekkah

Dedicated customer focused administrative professional offering significant experience in self-directed position requiring effective support, secretarial, and administrative abilities. Proven interpersonal, communications, and multi-tasking skills. Adaptable team player recognized for willingness to learn and teach newly acquired skills.

QUALIFICATIONS:

• 3 yrs. of administrative experience in a health care setting, handling multi-faceted clerical tasks .

• Exceptional ability to communicate effectively with staff, patients, and public.

• Ability to translate from English to Spanish.

• Proficient in Microsoft Word and Excel.

• First Aid/CPR certified from American Red Cross

EDUCATION:

Bachelor’s of Arts- Psychology California State University Dominguez Hills

Concentration Courses: Behavior Modification, Abnormal Psychology, Case Management Functions.

PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE:

Residential Treatment Facility, Bayfront Youth and Family Services

Administrative Secretary, 2006- Present

• Provided administrative support to all departments. Maintained department calendar.

• Compiled statistical data for monthly and quarterly reports.

• Managed legal and medical documents and billing for CEO/Administrator.

• Audited charts for the unit. Attended Utilization review meetings.

Accomplishments: Created and organized an information center for our department. Results: Better

access to information, and less time searching for it. Employee of the Month- June.

2008, Nov. 2009. Commended for being a team player in intiating a team effort

to help resolve a work unit crisis with our clients.

Psychiatric Hospital, Kedren Community Mental Health Center

Case Manager- Children’s Outpatient, 2005-2006

• Worked with at-risk youth and their families to help minimize their defiant behavior youth were exhibiting.

• Translated for Spanish speaking clients. Maintained progress notes in clients charts.

• Provided referrals to clients in housing, education, mental health, and medication services.

• Handled and resolved more than 20 cases of families in providing family stabilization and re-unification.

Accomplishments: Provided outstanding services to both clients and departments during our Audit Survey.

Level 14 Group Home H.V. Group Home, Inc.

Youth Counselor, 2004-2005

• Counseled juveniles with behavior problems and promoted the safety and well being of adolescents.

• Taught groups on life skills, anger management, and positive self-image.

• Charted and filed notes for social workers and probation department.

Accomplishments: Received “Employee of the Month” for taking on more responsibilities of other

employees and intervening in a crisis situation with a client. Received high

performance evaluations from supervisors for exhibiting leadership and excellent work

ethic.

3 Answers

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  • CoachT
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I see some minor grammatical things in here but overall it's pretty good if you're wanting a job as a medical office secretary or in administration in a hospital/mental health facility.

    I'd move the experience entries to the top so that they're highlighted. I'd also kill that "3 years experience" comment, you have 6 years total here fairly related to each other "in health care settings".

    Clarify that MS Office skill level with some validation. MCAS certification might be a major advantage here. Also clarify which levels of Red Cross certification - some employers in that setting will require CPR at the professional rescuer level or with AED. Consider getting your CPR from AHA instead - it's the same material but many health folks lean toward that one.

    Consider getting some training in computerized accounting systems such as QuickBooks or Peachtree - it could boost your computer skills section considerably.

    I'd drop the employee of the month references - if it were "employee of the month for 24 consecutive months..." that might help but with only a couple references, it's not helping at all.

    You mention that Word, Excel, and Translation skill but don't show us in your experience where you've used it. Elaborate on that.

    Your specialization in the BA (write that as "Bachelor of Arts in Psychology" - no apostrophe there and no dash) doesn't really matter here unless you're applying for positions in client care, in that case your initial statement is wrong - it tells us you want to be an administrator.

    Run this through spell-check and pay attention to where you've put some commas - they don't all go where you have them.

    It looks like you're leaning into a career that will go into health administration or will stagnate as "administrative assistant" or "secretary". You might want to look into going back to school for an MHA (Master of Health Administration) or an MBA. If you don't have any supervisory experience (I don't see any mentioned here) then get some.

    Add: I don't agree that it looks like a professional resume writer wrote that - at least not a good one. It has too many errors in it to be professional and doesn't include the expected template-based "buzz words". The most glaring indicator that a professional didn't write it is that the premises set forth in that paragraph are not supported in the body of the resume. A secretary probably wrote this and not too bad of a secretary/admin asst.

    HR people usually ignore that paragraph by the way - it's always BS that says little more than "I'd like a job please". We jump straight into the meat of the resume and make our own conclusions.

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  • 1 decade ago

    In a sense, your resume is too "professional" and self-serving. Mildly too much puffery. Jaded HR people see this kind of resume all the time. They learn to discount the actual wording. Look, for example, at the first paragraph:

    "Dedicated customer focused administrative professional offering significant experience in self-directed position requiring effective support, secretarial, and administrative abilities. Proven interpersonal, communications, and multi-tasking skills. Adaptable team player recognized for willingness to learn and teach newly acquired skills."

    Is that really you, or is is a caricature of you? Its (obviously) the kind of description a "professional" resume writer will use to justify his fee...

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  • Bess
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    You're hired!

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