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Your opinions on my book, and try criticize it the best you can.?

Okay,

I'm starting a book and the idea is that these 2 brothers, who are 16 and 10, Charlie(16) and Mitchel(10), there parents died in a car crash so they need to find a job so they can live. Only being 16 and 10 they have no resumes, and the only special skills they have is that Charlie can play the bass and Mitchel can, well, be there for his brother. So they make their own little group/band in the big city (Dublin, Ireland) (oh yeah they live in ireland). And 2 kids named Patrick Brown and Scott Sampson find them performing on the street and are impressed by Charlie's bass skills and his singing as well. So they both welcome the 2 brothers to there band, the Rugged Canines, and they become famous from there on, but change there named to the Canines under Charlie's recommendations.

Tell me what you think.

Criticize hard, I can take it.

4 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    this sounds like the beginning of a story, not really the whole plot, there needs to be more of a climactic element thrown in

    like, after they are part of the band....what happens? does something go wrong? is there like betrayal or do the become famous and then encounter the ups and downs of stardom? or something?

    or if the main focus is about their struggle to be a part of the band or make money, then there needs to be more elements in this part and their journey/struggle/development/growth/whatever

    also, i think 'mitchel' should have two l's --> mitchell

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  • huxman
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Here are 5 that I discover extraordinarily dull. But a few are useful: one million. The cellphone publication for town I reside in. two. The Joy of Cooking, the one prepare dinner publication I have. Dear Mom gave it to me. And I've used it possibly 5 occasions. The meals grew to become out ok, however no longer as well because the TV dinners I purchase and drag house and nuke within the microwave. three. The Complete Illustrated Kama Sutra, the pics appear extra showy than horny. four. How to Study in College. My dull aunt gave it to me and I'm deliberating making use of the pages in it to support begin fires within the fireside this wintry weather. five. Any so referred to as publication through that man or woman who wrote the Twilight trash. Well, that is 5 and I desire you're no longer as bored studying it as I am simply considering the ones books. Love to you, hold up the well battle, or some thing it's we are doing right here. xxo, xxo, xxo

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    i really like the story line..try to put a little twist into the

    story..(like the two brothers run away, or get lost or something)

    and then the fact that Patrick and Scott so easily accept them into

    their band is a little far streched..

    and where do the two boys live??

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  • 1 decade ago

    i really liked the plot of the story, but i would personally add some sort of spark to it. maybe a story and a backround to the two boys and the parents. i think that it is good tho, the names are also a bit.... idk they need something catchy to them, maybe try simplier names, in my opinion. keep going and good luck, you have talent. XD

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