火雞 asked in 社會與文化語言 · 1 decade ago

拜託商業英文高手救救我!~~我跟智障一樣~~二十點

事情是這樣的!~~我英文底子非常非常的差

可以說是跟國小生一樣

但是我辛苦應徵上了一家貿易公司

我想要好好ㄉ加強我的英文

今天有一封國外的郵件~~他內容的大意是她下給我們公司訂單..他要詢問貨到了沒

但是我根本不知道怎ㄇ回~~~我所我請我大學朋友幫我打了一段英文

(因為他也是在貿易公司上班)

但是我拿著我朋友打ㄉ這篇英文給主管看~~~

主管就打寫了一篇他的版本~~他說以外國人的角度~~這樣會比較清楚

所以我想要請大家幫我解釋一下這兩種英文到底哪一個寫ㄉ比較好

要以外國人的角度來看喔!!~~~

順便可否告訴我未什麼~~~希望越清楚越好!!~~~~

以下是兩種版本的英文!!~~~希望高手給我指點!!~~拜託拜託

Dear Polly

please be noted, the PO No: BEL/211111181-1 is delivered by courrier & please find the attachment for ur reference.

The tricking no. is UPS EXPRESS 1Z4W010F2824

About PO No:BEL/4-1. BEL/4-2

His delivery were 2009.Dec.24 and 2009.Feb.22

The detail please be received the attached.

__________________________________________________________________

Dear Polly

1. RE EFLXXXX The PO No: BEL/2111111181-1 MTC115-07-E 2Kpcs, we already shipped in2009.11.30, enclose invoice no 9113001 for you ref .

The tricking no : UPS EXPRESS 1Z4W010F2824

2.Re the EFLXXXXX The PO No:BEL/4-1 . BEL/4-2 , enclose our confirm order for you ref

Best Regards

5 Answers

Rating
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Dear Polly,

    Your P.O. No.: BEL/211111181-1 has been delivered via UPS on 2009.11.30, the tracking No. is 1Z4W010F2824 (Express service). Please be advised.

    For your P.O.: BEL/4-1 and BEL/4-2, the ETD (Etimated Time of Delivery) are on 2009.Dec.24 and 2010.Feb.22 accordinlgy. Kindly be advised. If there is any concern, please feel free to contact us for a further assistance. Thank you!

    Best regards,

    xxx

    2009-12-04 16:47:07 補充:

    你的 BEL/4-2 的預定交期打錯了啦,還2009/2/22 哩,已經交貨啦?(小心被主管修理)

    2009-12-04 16:52:53 補充:

    要更詳細,第一句可以改成:

    Your P.O. No.: BEL/211111181-1 ( 2K pcs. of MTC115-07-E) has been delivered via UPS on 2009.11.30. The tracking No. is 1Z4W010F2824 (Express service). Please find our invoice No.: 9113001 for you reference. Thanks!

    2009-12-04 17:03:18 補充:

    不好意思,打錯了一個字,更正: ETD (Estimated ..... 少了個s

    Source(s): 用我的啦,我天天在回覆這種e-mail
  • 5 years ago

    到下面的網址看看吧

    ▶▶http://qoozoo201409150.pixnet.net/blog

  • 1 decade ago

    講日期時的介係詞只能用on! 所以你的老闆用in是錯了!

    而且, 以完成式用來形容時間也是不對,不能用has been delivered on …

    建議立即改成簡單過去式才符基本文法 “ was delivered”!

  • 1 decade ago

    Which one is your boss wrote?

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  • 1 decade ago

    下面那個比較好!!清楚簡單!!老外不會喜歡拉哩啦雜一大堆廢話!!

    條列是重點最好!

    最後有寫best regard就很有禮貌了!

    2009-12-04 16:34:46 補充:

    還有應該是tracking no. 吧!!

    tricking是作弄的意思唷!!不要搞錯了!

    Source(s): 在國外拿過的寫作課!
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