Pregnant, Muslim husband wants baby to be Muslim, I'm Christian?

My husband and I are having a baby, but we're from two different religious backgrounds. I'm Christian and he's Muslim. When we got in our relationship we fell in love fast and moved really fast. So we always danced around the topic of what religion our child would be.

Last night we got on the topic and he is being so selfish he wants out child to be Muslim no if ands or buts about it and I'm sooo sad. But I told him I was willing to allow our child to understand both religions. He is originally from Africa, but I mean here in America it's mostly Christians I don't want our child to grow up and wonder, why don't I celebrate Christmas or Easter. I feel soooo lost. Because I don't want to end our marriage becauseI love him to death but I feel like he is being selfish and not understanding. It's like his attitude is so nonchalant. I know this is our fault for not talking about it before, but now I don't know what to do.I've been crying allll morning and at this point I'm scared of a misscarriage. Does anyone have any advice or been through something like this. Please. I'm sooo down...

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Peace be unto you,

    First off all my sister. I have been practiced Christianity & revert Islam because Islam is the actual Religion of Jesus Christ not Christianity. As far as you said that upcoming child of yours, congratulations to you. Now you guys are having a issue for Religion for him. So before tell you about it in detail I have to tell you that Islam allows a Muslim man to marry Christian & Jew women. As far as you will not worship any God's creation, just the loving God (the Father) in Heaven. Not Jesus, Not Holy Ghost, ONLY GOD to forgive & ask forgiveness to him so you're allowed to marry to that guy. Because Islam says:

    "Verily, those who have attained to faith [in this divine writ], as well as those who follow the Jewish faith, and the Christians, and the Sabeans - all who believe in God and the Last Day and do righteous deeds - shall have their reward with their Sustainer; and no fear need they have, and neither shall they grieve." [Qur'an 2:62]

    According to Qur'an Jews & Christians will also be able to enter in Paradise but by believing in one God (not three or Jesus as God). And if YOU worship Jesus as your God so your marriage with him is forbidden according to Qur'an & Hadith & you MUST show my answer to him & tell him to contact Imam or Alim for more information. But better thing is for you to convert to Islam for the seek of God & Jesus because he (Jesus) preached Islam & he taught his dicples about a man come after him who you have to follow. His name will be Muhammad & you have to accept your religion for Salvation & that's what Jesus said:

    "When I shall send thee into the world I shall send thee as my messenger of salvation, and thy word shall be true, insomuch that heaven and earth shall fail, but thy faith shall never fail." Muhammed is his blessed name.' Then the crowd lifted up their voices, saying: `O God, send us thy messenger: O Admirable One, come quickly for the salvation of the world!'" [Gospel of Barnabas 97:9-10]

    Info about upcoming Prophet (Spirit Of Truth) after Jesus by Christian Scholar:

    - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HA4x_ntAyLw

    Youtube thumbnail

    The problem you're telling about that your hubby isn't understanding & being selfish so remember that in the second coming of Jesus he is gonna reject Christianity (faith) according to Islam & call Christians to follow Muhammad & your Bible also confirmed it.

    "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?' Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'" [Matthew 7:21-23]

    Jesus said that those who followed the will of my father will be in Heaven & according to God (the Father) the Salvation is only after following commandments & accept Prophet Muhammad (who you call a false prophet). Not accepting Jesus as God & he died because it is against the teaching of Jesus.

    You can hit me up on Yahoo or Email me for further information. :)

    Thanks,

    Hope I answered!

  • 1 decade ago

    Mormons (self proclaimed christians that they are) do not baptize children until they are 8, for the sole reason that they believe that before the age of 8 a child has hardly any capacity to make any sort of important decision like that. And in my experience, having once been a member of that religion, even 8 years old isn't nearly developed enough to properly judge and make such a decision.

    Your husband, and many of the people who answered here are likely missing a very important point.

    What is really best for the child?

    And the only honest answer that anyone could give to such a question is: love them, and give them as much information as possible and the support to make choices of their own. This isn't really about you or your husband. Parent's do not own their children, and what religion this child will one day partake of is out of both of your hands. It's between them and God. To otherwise insist they do one thing or another is selfish.

    That is of course regarding the beliefs they will one day have. As far as traditions and culture, I agree with some others here that a mix would almost be inevitable.

  • 1 decade ago

    Okay,

    Start by drying your eyes and taking a deep breath.

    It doesn't sound like he is going to give in on this easily. I think the best compromise would be to let him grow up in one religion and be introduced to the other when the child is about 12 years old.

    The most democratic way to decide what religion the child is first would be by community. If you live in the Americas or Europe Christianity would be the better choice. The child will relate better to the community they live in. Being muslim could make them ostracized from society.

    If you live in a dominantly muslim country then Islam would be the better choice.

    If you approach it from what is best for the child by the region you reside in you are putting the child before either of your personal beliefs to give it the best possible life. No one has an unfair advantage this way.

    Your husband may not like it but the it is the most fair solution to your problem. It benefits your child. Both sides will be heard eventually but one has to take the lead in the formative years.

  • 1 decade ago

    That's exactly why you're supposed to discuss that BEFORE you get married and/or pregnant. Now you're stuck. Ultimately the kid will pick what's best for him/her, but while he/she is growing up, you and your husband are going to have to reach an agreement.

    Add: What did you do for your wedding? Was it Muslim or Christian, or did it have elements of both? If it was Muslim, you have demonstrated already that you will cave into him and therefore he knows if he's insistent he'll get his way about how to raise the kid.

    Source(s): non-religious theist, former agnostic, married to a Christian
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  • Rover
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    That's a very tough situation, for sure. Islam teaches that when a baby is born into a family where only one spouse is Muslim, the child must be brought up Muslim. This is what they believe, and your husband will probably not back down on this. Your child, depending on how orthodox your husband is, will participate in Christian holidays to the same extent your husband does. If you want your child to be raised as a Christian, you may have to give up your marriage. Hopefully he can accept your offer of raising him/her with an understanding of both religions...but don't hold your breath.. :(

  • 1 decade ago

    Seek marriage counseling. There is no way I would EVER let my husband dictate how our child will be raised. The baby belongs to BOTH of you, and he needs to understand that your religion is just as important to you and his is to him. If he loves you, and loves his child, he wouldn't demand you compromise your will. There is no reason why you can't both teach your child what you each believe, and when the child is old enough, give him the freedom to choose which he would rather follow - or to reject both and find his own path.

    When I had my first child, I was a Christian, and my husband was an atheist (we were not married at the time). We agreed that we were both responsible for our child, and we would each teach our child what we knew and believed and leave the final decision to him.

  • 1 decade ago

    Sounds complicated for many reasons. I'm sure that you're seeing now the importance of marrying someone like minded. As far as your child is concerned, what does your christian faith call you to do? There have been many a man won over to Christ because of their wives acting in a Christian way to a non Christian husband. However, many times it took years. So, I would think that YOU living out your Christian faith will be the most powerful testimony for your husband and your child. This will include much prayer alongside daily devotion to His word AND, most importantly, living out what you claim to believe.

  • 1 decade ago

    You should have discussed this topic a lonnnng time ago.

    A Muslim man is required to make sure his children are brought up as Muslims. You're married to this guy, and you don't know that?

    I am married to a Muslim, also. We discussed the possibility of children BEFORE we were married, and I agreed that if we had any kids together, they could be Muslim.

    What's the big deal, anyway? Muslims believe in Jesus, and can celebrate Christmas if they want to (they're not usually very vocal about it, but many of them do), and you can celebrate whatever holidays YOU choose, and include the kid(s) if you want, even without making it religious. My kids get a basket of candy every Easter, presents for Xmas, and they go Trick-or-Treating on Halloween.

    .

    Source(s): Muslim Husband, four Muslim kids.
  • 1 decade ago

    In love or not, fast pace or not, surly you must have known conflicts would arise within the marriage; so here is the truth of it: 'It is no use crying over split milk.' You now have to deal with it and no matter what advice you are given, you must still face this issue with your Muslim husband.

    My apologies if I sound a little rough here, but this is how it is and you know it. I do hope it works out for both of you.

    God bless.

  • 1 decade ago

    Get an attorney, assert your parenting rights and be willing to duke this out in court.

    I'm sorry, but if you are a true believer in Christ, your child's eternity is everything. At least that's how I feel about my child.

    People telling you what you should or should not have done are unhelpful now, aren't they? Of course you are in a mess. You will have to choose between your husband (a grown man) and your baby. PRAY about this.

    Source(s): Christian attorney-- yes, we do this
  • Pan
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    If you are married to this man then its too late to talk. But if I married a Muslim man I would respect his faith but continue to follow Christ. You both pray to God, surely and on that you can agree. The problems will arise when the child becomes of age for school and education. He will want his child to be inculcated into the Muslim faith and there is no going back or leaving. I admire strong principles where they are tempered by inclusion and understanding. That may not be so likely. Talk to him?

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