Any advice or consolation about this.......?

I was in a very violent and abusive marriage with my first husband, and I have now met a wonderful man that I'm beautifully loved by. He's literally a gift from God. We are engaged to be married soon,but I'm nervous about our wedding night and honeymoon because I still have marks and scars on my body from the abuse in my first marriage.

It's very embarrassing.My husband to be Howard knows about the abuse but he hasn't seen my body or seen me naked because I don't think sex should happen outside of marriage, and I haven't done anything since my first marriage.

I am self conscious enough as it is with my body and my self aside from the physical and emotional scars. Howard tells me I'm beautiful and special all the time, but I don't know what he'll think when he sees how my body looks

4 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Well honey if he is everything you want in a man and sent from heaven. He would over look everything about your body Its only skin your soul is what he loves. You shouldn't be embarrassed, shy, or have low self esteem. No man likes a woman with low self esteem as long as you love every inch of your body he will love it right along with you. And i know the scars come from the first marriage but now its apart of you and you have to accept that first. As long as you Love Your Self there is nothing to worry about..

    Wish you luck on your marriage

  • 1 decade ago

    Be confident; after all he knows that you were married once and ex-fellow was a abusive person, tell him, you dont have to pretend. After all ,the present one liking you and loves as a person. That shoulb be there between two individuals- one should not love somebody' for her/his body, or for their money, one should only a person for her qualities or beauty.That kind of love knows no bounds.

    After all its your choice and taste for life, some how other you have fallen into a bad fellow, now make your life much better, and you should always show love to a man, it is males weakness once a women loves them and offer herself to him no person forget a such a woman, and they ultimately surreder to her love.

    I think your present Howard like that and i think loves you so much.

    I can understand your old experience left you with nightmares and scars, think about future. Leave all that behind live for present and future and enjoy it every moment.

    Best of luck.

    Source(s): My observations.
  • Pretty
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    You and I have something in common. I was abused by my father--badly; and my first husband of 23 years.

    My husband now is very sweet, and loves me unconditionally, and I him. (There must be an equal give and take).

    It sounds like you have a Good One! Don't worry, it will be fine. he is probably just like my Honey----he Knows that he isn't perfect either, so

    any imperfections you have will not matter too him. He loves what is

    inside you--that is what a true Soul Mate is (in my book). Unconditional love!

    God bless! I am happy for you!

    P.S.....It is Natural to be a bit nervous though...I bet he is more nervous than you! :)

    Love, Cyndi

  • ?
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Love your red hair. Sounds like he likes you for all the right reasons. You are so much more than a body. So is he. To bad your first husband was a thug. Here's to a life time of joy.

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