Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdolescent · 1 decade ago

My 13 year old bestfriend might be pregnant?

Okay,

so she had sex with her stupid 16 year old boyfriend,

chello. 3 times, once unprotected cause she was high with him.

Her mom is dead, she lives with her grandma and 12 year old sister, her dad is in arizona with her step sister and brother.

So basically she does whatever she wants.

She took the prego. test yesterday,

and it said she was pregnant,

but she's gonna tell me in a week or two later,

to make sure its positive.

I told her i think she needs to get an abortion, if she does have the baby, cause shes to young, etc.

She says shes gonna keep it if she does,

and is planning on staying in highschool throughout it,

and is gonna have her grandma, and her boyfriend's mom

take care of it.

Note, she's in 8th grade.

Plz dont think im trolling,

like she's thinking it isn't gonna be a big deal,

which it actually is.

I am really scared for her.

And i really wanna help her,

cause i dont want her to have her whole life ruined

already. How can i help?

Or anything?

Update:

People you can be upset at me,

for thinking for her to have an abortion,

but i didn't tell her she has to,

i just think that its an idea.

Update 2:

Her grandma, and her boyfriends mom already know.

The only people who know are her close friends and those 2 adults.

Im just worried for her.

16 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    how insensitive of her to say that her grandpa and boyfriend's mom will take care of it

    you really should inform yourself and tell her ALL the negative aspects or having a kid so young. She'll need a job, plus going to school, no parties, no going out, and so on

    megan: what the hell are you talking about?? she's not trying to be responsible she said other people will take care of it. She probably only wants it cause she likes babies

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If abortion is an option for her. . .

    If you go to a Planned Parenthood clinic that has a low-income program it can be as cheap as 100$. If you tells them you have no job, no money and no support they will likely have you pay the minimum for the procedure and get donations to cover the rest. 1-800-230-PLAN (1-800-230-7526) to find the Planned Parenthood clinic nearest you. If you are underage it will mostly likely be free.

    You have the choice between the pill (which can be taken up to 11weeks, at home or at a friends house) or the vacuum method (in clinic procedure). Personally I used the pill method so I could be at home with my husband but some women want to have the surgical, so it's done and over with when they leave the clinic.

    You will be financially screened - usually this goes on the honor system, weight/height taken, blood pressure checked, pricked -fingertip- to check for rH factor and anemia, you will receive an ultrasound or sonogram to determine gestational age. You may be asked if you want to view the image, this is up to you. You will receive antibiotics, anti-nausea tabs and pain meds. Take them ALL. You must finish at the very least your course of antibiotics. Follow all aftercare instructions and go back to your after care appt. This last step is vital, you must go back for your aftercare appt! Abortion begins a new menstrual cycle. You should have a regular period in 4 to 8 weeks.you should have the option of receiving birth control - again this will most likely be free, take it and use it correctly.

    If you are underage you may want to check this site out to see about parental consent laws and whatnot. http://www.sexetc.org/state *Even if it says you need parental consent, you don't. Call PP and tell them you cannot tell your parents; by law, a judicial bypass must be available to those minors who just cannot get their parents/guardians permission. A judge signs the parental consent acting as a de facto guardian.

    Some state medicaid program do pay for it, use this link and figure out if your state covers it. If they do, you can go to "welfare" office and get emergency coverage and the state and taxes will help pay for it. http://www.ourbodiesourselves.org/book/companion.a...

    I respect that it is your choice and understand that you are probably doing what's best for you. If you have any more questions or want/need to talk about it drop me an email.

    It is entirely possible to have an abortion and not feel guilt because you knew it was the right thing to do.

    ImNotSorry.net

    ~Pro-Choice Momma; Have had an abortion <no regrets> and I have a 9 month old daughter <no regrets>. I believe in protecting my daughter's choice.

    Abortion: There is a Consensus

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsSQiazUvgo

    Youtube thumbnail

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    She doesn't know what she has gotten herself into all of the things she will go through not only physical also mental there is a lot of stress and her body is not ready for giving birth sadly a friend of my cousin got pregnant at 13 and died while in labor so its most likely she will die in labor sorry and an abortion is the safest option at her age BUT if she doesn't want to get one don't force her don't make her grandmother or father force her if she doesn't want to get want she doesn't want to get one and if she gives birth and does not die she should really consider adoption because her grandmother and her mother's boyfriend wont be able to care for her properly.Sorry

  • 1 decade ago

    She is putting herself at risk as well as the baby having a child that young, her body will barely be able to handle it, keep on what your doing and don't be scared to tell her grandmother, you can tell your mom and tell you mom to tell her grandma if you want or write a letter as your mom to her grandma and say you over heard your daughter talking on the phone with her about it that way she can't get mad at you and cut off contact with you cause she needs a friend like you right now.

    Don't worry about these people being rude about the abortion, they always act like that no matter the circumstance. They don't care that it would cause health problems to mother and baby from being pregnant at that age.

    Source(s): I have been in situations like this with some of my old dumb friends and i had to act like their parents for them at times. I did that for one of my friends and later on in life she ended up thanking for it.
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  • 1 decade ago

    She had sex, she has to deal with the consequences.

    First off, she has to tell her boyfriend.

    Second, you have to support her no matter what.

    Third, she has to make sure she takes care of things with the baby and doesn't put it all on her grandmother and her boyfriend's mother.

    She also has to make sure she is prepared and doesn't suddenly freak out. Preparation can bring the stress down a lot.

    Good luck (:

  • like alot of other people said, you should just stay out of it. I know its hard to not help a friend when she is in need. but she doesn't think she is. you can't help anyone who isn't willing to help themselves. i personally think your friend is an idiot. getting high at 13, having effing sex at 13, and then getting pregnant at 13. she did a smart thing by telling an adult she trusts. so now they can deal with her. she is obviously not ready to have a kid thinking that she can just dump it on her grandma. and keep on going to school. thats ridiculous. don't try and get involved. if she needs help with something and asks you then you can help her if you want to. but once she realizes that its not going to be a joy-ride and that you want to help her, you will get sucked in. and you will feel like you have to help her because she is your best friend and she is pregnant. and you can help her maybe with whatever but you can't get too involved.

  • 1 decade ago

    Your best friend is an idiot. The first thing you have to do is smack her in the face and tell her to grow the fnck up.

    Next, you have to leave it alone. Its her problem, not yours. As hard as it is, you just have to let her mess up her own life and not get dragged into it.

  • Jenn
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    How nice... going to have a child for the grandparents to raise.

    hopefully she realizes before she has a baby how much work they really are. I don't think it's fair to have a child for someone else to raise unless they are wanting you to get pregnant so they can have a baby. lol

  • 1 decade ago

    She needs to grow up. She can't count on her Grandma and BF's Mom to take care of it. It's HER and her BOYFRIENDS kid. It's THEIR responsibility. And abortion is wrong, she shouldn't kill her baby because she decided to be a whore. Either she should give it up for adoption, or keep it.

  • Please NO abortion

    Tell someone SHE trust. You can help her while she have her baby. She will need someone on her side since these 9 months will be full of stress and pain.

    Good luck :)

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