Anonymous asked in Society & CultureReligion & Spirituality · 1 decade ago

My husband left me for my best friend and my mom watches their kids?

My husband and I had been married for two years. He came to me and said that he was in love with someone else, that someone else happened to be one of my best friends that I'd known since the day I was born. Our parents were friends and we had grown up together.

He said that nothing physical had ever happened between them, but I later found out that they had actually had an affair before we got married....(which is why she moved moved half way across the country a week after we got married). He said that it wasn't fair to ME if he stay married to me when he was in love with someone else.

Basically, everyone considered him to be the noble one. He wasn't creeping around, he left me the house, more money than he should have, he was in "LOVE", couldn't help his feelings...these are things people told me at the time. I invested 8 years into our relationship, two of them as his wife, I truly loved him, yet he just walked out and everyone around me acted as if it wasn't a big deal!

My friend and I had the same circle of friends there all still really close to her. I know they have a right to, but it bothers the hell out of me. If one of my friends stole their friends husband I wouldn't want anything to do with them.

My ex husband and the girl got married 5 months later, they moved to New York and then recently moved back here. It's been nearly four years since he left yet I'm still not completely over it. I've had trust issued with every guy I've dated since and I secretly despise how happy they seem together.

It bothers me how accepting everyone, including my family is of them. My mom and her mom are close friends, I never expected her to stop being friends with he family, but I went to visit my mom and she was babysitting their kids! I found out that my "friend" tutors my little brother on a regular basis and he regularly visits them. It pissed me off, my husband left me for my best friend and my family associates with both of them as if nothing had ever happened.

6 Answers

  • Favorite Answer

    Wow, I though my last heartbreak was horrible (and it was :(

    but that was worse. I dont see how any "best" friend could do that to their best friend. I would rather die than to have an affair and run off with my bf's husband-knowing how depressed, lonely, unappreciated and just hurt she would be, i wouldnt be able to stand it. And I dont think I could ever forgive my family for being so accepting of could they do that to you? Even though they havent experienced exactly what you've been through, they should understand how hurtful that is. But yeah, I know it hurts more when you know that the affair was more about love than anything..because all that time you though you had their heart it was someone elses (I know how that feels *tear*)

    I know how hard it is to move on when you've been surt so badly...there are things that my ex lover said over a year ago and I still remember them perfectly and it still hurts.

    But now, its your time to move on, you're an awesome person i can tell, and i know you didnt deserve that, but soon you will see that situation as the lesson it is, and take it with a grain of salt and just let it go...learn from it, because I think that God is preparing you for something bigger. Also, KARMA is real and shes a ***** lol, trust me, even if your bf and your husband are good people or whatever now, they ARE GOING TO GET THEIR KARMA, belive it or not, you might see it or you may not, but its coming trust me. The universe sees and feels everything, they will not get away with leaving someone in so much pain for so many years.

    And you, you will get your karma too, the good karma, as long as you stay positive and dont give in to the anger or sadness you may feel sometimes. You are a very strong person, because alot of people who have been through this become so self destructive and suicidal and some do commit are not one of them, keep getting stronger, get a stronger mind and spirit. Also, remember that there is so many so many good men out there, and one day a man will sweep you off your feet again and you'll fall in love and he'll be in love with you too.

    Keep your head held up high, do your best and forget the rest, and go do things you've always dreamed of doing (fun positive things), do yoga try something new! And always keep love in your heart, because it will always find its way back to you.


  • Karl
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    This is the way of the world, that is why Christians pray for the right one. We will wait so this type of thing will not happen. With God in my life and leading me, I know he will not lead me astray. Though he will take me though things to learn he is always there with me.

    Sorry but this is how the world works, and you are not alone in this area. Pray and seek God and know him and find the life he has for you and the blessings that go with it.

    take care.

  • 1 decade ago

    Whatever happens, please don't be bitter or angry and just move on. Their karma will come back to them so don't mess up your own. I feel sorry for you and wish you well. But the positive energy you invested in both relationships will come back as long as you don't sabotage it now with negative emotions.

    Be grateful that he left you the house and a lot of money. Be happy for him that he has found happiness. Only when you stop being negative and start looking at the positive will you start attracting the right kind of people who will be much better for you than he veer could be.

    Source(s): 4 Tds for such a sweet answer? WTF is YA coming to? Seriously! lol
  • Idk
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    I would beat up that girl, put her inside a big cardboard box and ship her off to Afghanistan.

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  • Moi
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    My husband ran off with my best friend and I sure do miss her!

    Just kidding!

    But sorry about your plight. Laughter is good medicine!

    Pro 17:22 A merry heart doeth good [like] a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.

  • 1 decade ago

    try and move away and take your child with you, otherwise with all the families getting together he will grow away from you, bite the bullet

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