Is ex gf hooking up already?

ok......left for va (from ca) for a month, while in va gf of 2.5 yrs tells me she's no longer "in love" with me anymore. THEN says she's been hanging out with this guy she met (tells me she just likes to meet new people and friends) and thinks he's "cute". i ask if she'd like to... show more ok......left for va (from ca) for a month, while in va gf of 2.5 yrs tells me she's no longer "in love" with me anymore. THEN says she's been hanging out with this guy she met (tells me she just likes to meet new people and friends) and thinks he's "cute". i ask if she'd like to hook up with him she says "i dont know, maybe if i got to know him better" (did NOT say "no"). next, i get back to ca after a month and find new lingerie (some of which is in the dirty pile [she says it wasn't for anyone other than me, bc she got it right after i left for the intention of wearing it when i got back]). also, of course i end up having sex with her again and find out that she's been shaving her pubes! (again, doesn't do that either unless someone sees it [normally for me]). next i find she gets defensive talking about new friend (danny) and constantly tells me she's telling the truth about NOT hooking up with anyone while i was gone and that i need to learn how to trust her. i notice she had new lingerie (again, some of which in the dirty pile of laundry [and she doesn't wear lingerie unless it was for me]), she started dressing up more wearing "cuter" underwear doing make-up, etc. (again, usually did for me only). and now, i found a condom in her bag. (she tells me it's nothing and that her best friend put it in there to be "funny". and lastly, she tells me she wants to take things "slow" cuz she still "loves" me but is not "in love" with me.

so....now that you get the basic jist, should i trust my gut feelings that she's lying/hiding stuff and is, indeed, hooking up with other people....or should i trust her and believe all her counter-stories to the "evidence" and "clues" i've come to find...?
Update: also, she's been refusing to have me meet this new guy to determine if he and i could even be friends. she says it's simply bc i "bad mouthed" him when i first heard about him and how she felt about him. god someone please gimme an answer all this **** is wearing me down.
Update 2: and she insists that there's "NOBODY ELSE".....and that "there's nothing going on between danny and i, we're just friends". idk........if there's anything i learned from biz markie it's that you can't trust a girl if she says "it's just a friend" :(
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