How can I get my coworker to stop opening my mail, etc.?

My coworker is extremely nosy. If anyone tries to give me anything (cool pens, cupcakes, etc.) she will take 90% for herself and leave me with crumbs (sometimes literally). For example, a colleague from another department gave me a box of chocolates for my birthday last year and she left me with 2 pieces. She will even go as far as open my mail/inter-office stuff that is addressed to me and marked confidential. The latest thing she is doing is she is trying to read my email. I have no idea what her problem is and management isn't doing crap about it.

I just had the idea of putting laxatives in any sweets on my desk to solve the food problem but what should I do to have her stop opening my mail/inter office confidential stuff?

6 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I'm surprised there is no secure password system on your emails/ memos. This is a fire-able offense, so this is ok to tattle on. Also food is one thing, but pens and gifts? Also fire-able.

    As for food, I dare you to get something like chinese food, or a nice take out meal and leave it out for a couple of days at home, then bring it into the office. You can bet she'll need a couple days to recuperate, and maybe learn a lesson. Good luck with the laxative! That'll be hard to incorporate without detection.

    Source(s): Augusten Burroughs (Dry) Chinese food scheme
  • 5 years ago

    Most affairs begin at the work place. If you are uncomfortable about this then it is a problem for the marriage. It isn't just about being jealous. If he hasn't been unfaithful, never given you any reason to doubt him, you should still be concerned. There is always that first time and it is better to be watchful and prepared, than the wife who was the last to know. When we are married we have a real living entity which has needs of its own seperate from the needs of each individual spouse. In order to keep a healthy marriage entity alive and well we need good solid communication, trust and a willingness to do what is in the best interest of that marraige. Since you are feeling so uncomfortable I reccomend you follow your gut feeling about this. We often don't listen to what our gut tells us and live to regret it. Talk with your husband some more and tell him you just feel so uncomfortable about this that it is causing you anxiety and worry where you shouldn't have it. Life is difficult enough without having such additional stress. Your husband deserves to have friends but not ones who his spouse finds threatening. You are feeling very threatened by this and you have every right to those feelings. Right or wrong these are your feelings and your husband should respect that simply because he loves you and doesn't wish to hurt you. I agree only on the principle that this is causing you harm. It could very well be harmless, but it isn't harmless if you are feeling how you are. Talk with your husband and tell him you don't wish to accuse him of anything, but that you know affairs more often than not start in the work place simply because of the proximity. The availability of other people. Tell him that you are feeling threatened and are very uncomfortable. It is a matter of the marriage, a problem of the marriage because it is affecting you. If it affects one person negitively then it is something which affects the marriage. If he is insensitive to your needs or refuses to stop, then I reccomend you ask him why he would prefer to continue behavior which causes you hurt and discomfort. If he refuses, then that is a sign that it is more than he may be willing to even admit to himself. Nobody wishes to be perceived as a jealous ninny who is possisive of their spouse and wishes to deny him/her friendship. However, this is an issue which must be resolved or you will build up resentments and it could very well lead to deeper issues within the marriage. If it hurts you then it is an issue and must be resolved. I am not saying you are a jealous ninny, just that nobody wishes to be perceived that way and in trying to avoid that perception may not do what is needed to stop something before it gets out of hand. It is simply not OK to live with something which causes such emotional pain, worry, and stress. I wish you the very best in resolving this with your husband. I also think you are wise to be on the lookout for possible trouble situations. It is better to be prepared than cought unaware. Trust is crucial, but blind trust is foolish.

  • mark m
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    first off if your boss is not doing anything about the mail file a complaint with your human resources department stating that she is in violation of company policy . as to the theft of food and other since it seams to be esculating go to court and get a protective order on her stating that she could not come with in 200 feet of you or she will be arrested.

  • 1 decade ago

    If your boss isn't doing anything about it, pony up and confront her. That's absolutly rediculous.

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  • L.Mack
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Confront her. Don't try to be polite- she won't listen

    tell her straight!!

  • 1 decade ago

    tell her about it, wdf, that is just wrong of her .

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