torn between mom and boyfriend?

I am almost 18 and I have a 15 month old son. My boyfriend was living with me and my family for a year when he moved back with his parents. This was after a heated argument between my mom and him about our relationship and how she bad-mouthed his parents etc. Its been over 3 months since this happened and my life is an absolute nightmare. I want to go see him and I want our son to spend time with his father too but every time I go my mom gets angry and will usually refuse to talk to me then blow up yelling. Im sick of this because I'm stuck in the middle. She swears he is selfish and a horrible person (he refuses to come inside the house if my mom is there, makes me take our son to go see him,etc) and my boyfriend swears she hates him for no reason and she is a *****. Both are a little right but both are also extremely unreasonable. I cant choose anyone's side to be on but I cant stand this stress. I don't know if I should choose my mom or my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years. I would love to choose both but i don't think that is happening. oh ya and my mom likes to scream "I hope i get my cancer back and I'll die, would that make you happy." which of course adds to my stress. Any advice please!!!


By the way we are trying to save money to move out but with college and a baby it is very difficult to save money.

Update 2:

my mom has her reasons but they are all things that have happened in the past. such as my boyfriend used to have many girlfriends but hasnt in 3 years. and i think she is still angry that he got me pregnant. he is extremely devoted to me but she has trust issues. ive talked to her over and over again but it always ends up in yelling because she feels like i must choose her side and i try to point out his side which angers her

3 Answers

  • Angela
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Your mother is angry, for what ever reason she has, you shouldnt choose between the 2 people you care about most. If i were you, i would seriously talk to your mom, she seems angry at something, and ask her what it is, and dont just stand for ' i dont like him '. Talk to your bf aswell, you need to set up a plan so you guys can spend time together with your child. Tell her this is your life, and you arnt going to choose because she just doesnt like him. Stand your ground.

  • 1 decade ago

    Oh my god, this sounds JUST like my situation!

    Only I would be in your boyfriend's shoes...

    His mother sounds just like your mother. Shes an absolute nut! &she does hate me for no reason.

    She would always say that shes going to kill herself and hopes that she dies. She was acting like that because I think she was extremely jealous of me and she has mental problems and needs help.

    Im not sure of what to tell you...but if this continues then having a successful relationship with your boyfriend is highly unlikely.

    I think maybe you need to have a talk with your mother and politely tell her to keep out of your relationship and try and be civil with your boyfriend.

  • 1 decade ago

    choose your mom your mom worry about the boyfriend later shes more important than your boyfriend

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