My action (tell your wife the truth) is terrible in Western countries? Did I destroy his family? Pls help me!?

Now I feel very sad, stress and blamed myseft when that man blamed on me and seems I did something wrong. In fact I just want him to come back to his family and they will Happy together if his wife can forgive him.

Never a single day stop crying for his cheating action.

I met a French man who lives in Rochester NY, in a dating website. He told me that he separated with his wife 5 years and had an unhappy marriage and already sent divorce dox to the court just waited divorce finalizing. From US he sent me a lot of love card, gifts. He called me chat with me everyday and always told me that he missed me and love me so much. He saw me twice in my country and we was very happy together. He said to me he never met so beautifull, nice and well educated woman like me. He seems very nice man I never thought that he cheated on me. I love him so much with all my heart. He sweared with me he loves me so much and will marry me. I feel be cheated and then I searched in internet I found his wife in Facebook. I decided to ask his wife if he separated 5 years and divorce sent to the court as he said. His wife was very shock and upset about her husband. She told me to send her all the proof of her husband affair. I think his wife should know what kind of husband she live with, when her husband cheated on her so I decided to tell her all the truth and sent her all the proofs I have. I also told her before me her husband already loved a Chinese girl when he worked in China. When he left China that girl cried a lot. I knew this story because my boyfriend told me this story himseft. After talking with his wife I knew that they never been separated and he cheated on me. I feel so sorry his wife because I did not know my boyfriend cheated on me about his marriage status at the beginning. I feel hurt and broken heart, because I give my heart for a wrong man. He lied and cheated both his wife and me. I can understand his wife must in pain and hurt so much about his cheating action. That man called me blamed me why told the truth to his wife and why I sent to her the proof and why I destroyed his family? He said I am Vietnamese and do not understand Western thinking. He said to me my action (tell the wife truth) is terrible action in Western countries. I said to him, "I will not lower myseft to love a married man and stole happiness of other woman, I just do the things I should do and give a peace to my soul. " I am so sad but I know I should leave him. He loves NOBODY, he is seftfish and loves only himseft. I just could not understand why he has a nice wife, 3 lovely children and does not respect his family, chose the way to cheat a little woman from other side of the world.? Did I destroy his family? Why an old man can cheated on me like this? I feel very sad and can not understand why that man blamed on me. My action (tell his wife the truth) is terrible in Western countries? Can I believe there is still honest man in this world? I never met great liar and cheater like him in my life. All the men in internet are cheater?

Please kindly let me know. Thanks for your answer in advance

Update:

This man is very good in speaking and know how to win my heart. His wife believed that a mistake of him when I told her the truth. And he cried very well and his wife am a bad woman and he just made a mistake to love a woman so nice and beautifull so he can not stop.

Update 2:

This man is very good in speaking and know how to win my heart and say the seetword woman likes to hear. His wife believed that a mistake of him after I told her the truth. He cried very well and his wife think he just made a mistake to love a woman, who is so nice and beautifull so he can not control his heart.

6 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    let me say that from the way you described it he lied to you in the first place. if you honestly didn't know he was still married then don't blame yourself. this man wove a web of lies(and it sounds like he did this before as well) and it finally bit him on the ***. he ruined his own marriage when he decided to disrespect his own wife and family. it sounds like he blamed you because he is such a sob that he would rather blame the innocent party than take responsibility for his own actions. there is nothing wrong with telling the truth and i believe that his wife had a right to know. after all, she basically gave of her life to this man, had children with him and then was completely disregarded. for her future protection and that of her children i believe you did the right thing. no this is not a terrible thing in western culture, but i will say please be careful in the future when meeting men on the internet. 9 times out of 10 that is where married men go because they think they won't be caught.

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  • Sleep
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    You haven't destroyed any families or done anything wrong. This is all his fault. You did n't lie to the man's wife; rather you showed her the truth about her husband and hopefully put an end to his disgraceful behaviour that he has gotten away with until now.

    Most humans, male or female, are dishonest, though some more than others. There are genuine respectful people out there, but hopefully this experience has taught you to be more careful and less trusting from the outset. This is especially true of internet relationships, as it is so much easier for people to hide and lie. Take care, but do not give up hope.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You did the right thing the only person who did anything wrong is the man. He did not want you to tell his wife because he is a dirty cheating b*******. Unfortunately you can never tell if anyone is telling you the truth but their is still good men out there. In future if anyone tells you about leaving a girl and her crying is just not worth trusting if he has done it to someone else what is to stop him doing the same to you.

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  • 1 decade ago

    It's really good of you that you told his wife. She should know the scumbag she's married to.

    And don't worry, you'll find love someday. I wouldn't look on the internet, though -- there's too many shady people on it and it's difficult to trust people that you have not met in real life.

    Look around your hometown and at your job; you may meet someone special there.

    Source(s): And I'm from the U.S. and if I were married to scum I would want someone to tell me that he was a horrible man.
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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You did the right thing. I hope this is a lesson to other people who think they will get away with this.

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  • 1 decade ago

    You have been used by this man.

    You have told his wife.

    Now,move on.....and do not be so easily conned by the Web again.

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