Only 3 days left until my untalented 12 y.o. and her tween friends assault us with their Un-Talent Show! What?

What shall I do? Where can I hide? The block party is this weekend! I ran up and down the block in the middle of the night trying to induce a heart attack but it was no use. How can I catch the Swine flu? Please help with your ideas!!! The Lord is sending me terrible trials!!!
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