Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

How do you know when you've found your soul mate?

I ask because I think I've found mine.

It's hard being a fat woman. All of my life, I have been relegated to playing the role of a clown, to always being the one good for a laugh, and to be laughed at. I haven't had anyone that I think I could consider as ever having really loved me, and I pretty much assumed it would always be this way.

Until now.

My friend and co-worker broke up with her boyfriend and kicked him out; for a year now she has related what their life together has been, and the way she has talked about him, you would think the guy was a monster. Whenever he would stop by work to see her he seemed pleasant, but she told us he is really a low-life. I accepted that what she said was the truth---she would know, after all---and left it at that.

Well, at the coffee shop one day, there he was, sitting alone at a table. I noticed him as I got my coffee and pastry, but didn't imagine he'd remember me, so I just sat down at my own table and started in on my pastry. Well, he glanced up, seemed to recognize me, and came over. "Hey, you're the lady who works with ________", he said. "Yes; I'm surprised you remembered me", I laughed in reply.

Well, we got to talking, and he poured his heart out to me. I never had a man open up to me like that. He told me how he was hurt over the breakup with my friend, and knew she had been dragging his name through the mud, but that he understood she was going through her own hurt, and that he allowed her to do whatever she needed to in order to grow. He wouldn't respond to any of that, just give her understanding, and hoped that she healed her heart. I was just incredibly moved by this. Here was someone totally different from the man I had heard my friend talk about. I was impressed with his character. He noticed the time, and apologized for talking my ear off, but he told me how much I had helped him. He looked at me straight in the eyes and said, "You know, I really appreciate you listening. I'm sleeping on a friend's couch until I can get on my feet, and have been pretty depressed about it, and over the breakup. You've helped me more than you can know." I was so shocked that here was a handsome, charming, and sensitive man, and one who wasn't laughing at me, or making a joke at my expense. Here was a man who saw something good in me. I don't think I ever had that before.

I told him to please call on me whenever he needed someone, that I would be glad to help. After that, we met and talked, and I got him a cell phone so that he could call me whenever he liked. He didn't want to take it, but I told him to please take it, that I wanted to be a real friend to him. It wasn't long after that that I got the biggest surprise of all.

He told me he was developing feelings for me! I asked him how he could love a fat pig like me. That was the only time I saw a shadow of anger cross his handsome face. He said, "Don't ever call yourself that. You don't realize it, but you are beautiful. Your beauty starts in your heart, and works its way to the surface." I never thought I would hear someone speaking to me like that. I was just amazed.

We started dating clandestinely, usually just meeting at my place for dinner. I saw him once downtown with his arm around a lady, and I was sure he had seen me and then gone the other way, which confused me; he came by that evening and explained that yes he had seen me, had been out with his sister, and couldn't yet be public about me, since it was still too soon after his breakup. You see, if anything got back to my friend and co-worker, it would cause me nothing but problems, and he didn't want to do that to me. Can you imagine? A man who is so thoughtful and considerate of me, that he even cares not to make things hard for me at work. I can honestly say, I have given my heart to him. Yes, I am in love.

Last night, he made love to me for the first time, and I was so nervous about it. He was so gentle and caring, though, and kept telling me over and over how beautiful I was. He could tell I was nervous, and told me he knew I had been hurt so much in the past, but if there was one thing I could trust, it was that he would never hurt me. He held me gently for the longest time when we were through, and was quiet. After a while, he said, "You know, this is the best part of any day that I have had in my entire life. I didn't think I would fall in love again; now I realize that I am truly falling in love....for the first time."

I was just crying tears, hearing someone say that about *me*. Fat girl me. The girl who got her head shoved in the toilet in school, the girl who got asked to the Prom by a good looking jock, only to realize it was a vicious joke, the girl whose co-workers tease the UPS delivery man that I have the hots for him, and laugh while he cringes in This man loves ME!

He told me that if he were rich, he would buy me this diamond ring he could get for $6,400.00; he has a friend with connections.


He told me that if he were rich, he would buy me this diamond ring he could get for $6,400.00; he has a friend with connections. He said that for right now he would give me his heart to hold in lieu of the ring. Well, I offered the $4,300.00 I have in savings, if he thought he could get his friend to work something out. He refused to let me clear out my savings, but I insisted he take it. I have to admit, there is just something magical about a handsome man giving a beautiful diamond ring to me, the proverbial ugly duckling. He reluctantly accepted, and this morning I ran by my bank before work and got the cash for him.

Update 2:

I am waiting now for him to come by my work; he said that he thought the time was right to go public with our love, and that he would come by on my lunch hour to give me the ring in front of everyone. I admit it: I want those mean girls to see that I have someone who loves me. It will be a little payback for them!

Well, I know I have written a lot here, but I am so nervous waiting for him to show up. My lunch hour was over a couple of hours ago, but I am sure he is just running late. Maybe he is getting himself all spruced up to come by.

Well, thank you for letting me share my happiness with you. There ARE such things as happy endings!

I really can't wait for him to get here.

19 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    The Love of My life passed away . But I have heard that in my state there are at least 300 men that I would be compatible with if I were really interested .And I am 56 years old .

    My weight has always bounced up and down through out the years . I have a pair of jeans for every size of me .

    Please don't give him your money . Even though he may be as honest forth right and the most loving man ever .

    I can tell that You are such a wonderful person .


    I am a bit like you are and sometimes feel unworthy of Love . My very Handsome late husband taught me other wise . I have a lot of creative talent . Yet I could Not sell my jewelry because I could not believe that any one would want it . My Husband proved to me that I was wrong and would sell my jewelry after work at the Night clubs on coastal Texas .

    So often in just a few hours he would bring home $300.00 a night for me . My husband loved me no matter how I looked . and he would tell me that I had to be a bit more ruthless and say to my self " Hey I am Great I am the best there is - the creme of the crop .

    So Please Do not let any one Tell You other wise .

    and PLEASE do not let the actions or attitudes of people Define Who You Truly Are .

    Love and Peace to You Always .

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Oh, Dear Lesbo,

    I know that you have truly found your soul mate and I am just sorry that I waited too long to make my move. I have always been afraid to approach you because I am intimidated by you breathtaking beauty like if you were Cindy Crawford of whom you remind me very much but she was just my little boy crush and you are. well, were, the real thing. So close and yet so far. You probably wouldn't even recognize me since I am jsut one of those lowly trolls in Accounting who worships you from afar but I should tell you that I am not the only one. I hope that no one will do anything foolish to ruin your love because it sounds pefrect to me. I am heartsick and ashamed of my cowardice when I hear that you don't think other men could love you because there are least three of us down here. If I had only made my move befpore now I would not be so sad now and ready to end it all. i will not be coming back to work again because I can't bear to see you this happy and not be the reason for it. I wish you all the best when he shows up with that beautiful new ring. You will always have my heart!!

    Witth all my Love,

    Mike Hunt

    (frpom Accounting)

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    How did you ever get to be such a lucky girl? I think I cried for half an hour after reading this...tears of joy. When he does arrive with that ring...and he will, you'll be the happiest person no earth for all times.

    But hunny, you really can not shove this into your co-worker/his ex's face. That would just be bad news all around, I can just sense these things, you know. Don't even let her see the ring because you never know, she may think it was the one he took back from her.

  • 1 decade ago

    I waited and waited, but neither my handsome prince nor my glorious ring ever arrived.

    I was so worried when he didn't answer his phone. What if something had gone wrong? Perhaps he was crossing the street to get to me, and was hit by taxi!

    It would be all my fault!

    I called him. I waited. I called him again. I waited.

    I lay awake all night. I watched the clock tick past seven. Too early to call. 7:15, still too early. 7:30. Oh well, everyone is awake by 7:30. I called him. The number is not in service? Surely I dialed wrong. I tried again. The number is not in service.

    My heart sank. He'd changed his mind--awoken to reality. He wanted nothing to do with me. The idea of giving me a ring in front of his lovely ex frightened him away. I would get the money back in an envelope. He probably wouldn't even send a note. He would know I knew. After all, I'd known all along.

    But no envelope ever came.

    A week passed before I realized it was never coming. My heart was shattered. Money. He'd wanted money. Dark thoughts swirled through my mind. Just imagine if people found out. I was already a laughingstock. I would have to stay home; I could never show my face again.

    It was three days more before I went to the police. Slowly my anger ebbed out my pride. "Pride"--strange, I had never thought of myself as proud. I was always the victim, wasn't I? There's no pride in that.

    The police were already looking for Mr. Charming. He'd taken money from another woman. Not as much, but I wasn't the only one taken in. All those days talking myself into going to the station, I'd expected the police to laugh at my story. The clown who'd thought a man loved her. "Not our problem, sister," they'd say. "You're an idiot. We've got to help real people with real problems."

    Surprisingly, the officer was kind. We talked for a couple hours--he was very thorough. After he took all my information, he gave me his card, and told me to call him anytime. He walked me to my car, and told me he would get the bastard. He even called me the next day, to make sure I was okay. Those police really do their job!

    A week passed with little news, then, as I was sitting at work, tapping my pencil on the desk, the officer walked into the building. I stood as he approached.

    "We got him," he told me with a grin.

    "You did!" I said, excited, just as someone else echoed "You did!".

    I turned, confused. My coworker had also stood to face the officer. We regarded each other.

    Comprehension dawned on the officer's face first.

    "Ah. You must be the other one. This office really recycles, huh? Well, we got him. And it looks like we'll recover both of your funds."

    We both nodded.

    "I wanted to tell you in person." He grinned at me.

    My coworker and I didn't speak of the matter until a few days later when we received our money.

    "I'll call you with trial information," the officer promised. I could have sworn he gave a tiny wink.

    "Why didn't you tell anyone what happened?" I asked as we walked away, feeling a bit accusatory.

    "Everyone would have laughed at me."

    "I wouldn't," I said, but then I wondered if that was true.

    "Besides," she added, "I didn't think you were the kind of person who would date your co-workers ex."

    "Why?" I challenged at once. "Because I'm fat?"

    She looked taken-aback. "I just thought you were better than that," she said quietly.

    I also fell silent for a second. "Sorry," I managed.

    She took a moment to consider. "Don't mention it."

    We smiled at each other.

    Source(s): If it's not alright, don't let it be the end. Life is as dark as you allow it to be, my friend.
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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I got caught in Traffic babe, tehn while taking ashortcut, I got in a little accident, buped my head and developed short term amnesia, I forgot what I was doing, I had 4k on me in cash so I thougth I must be headed to vegas.. So I went to teh Airport and hopped the next flight, send me a bus ticket and I will be home soon BABE!

  • Diane
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Ask yourself the most serious questions of all, would you do anything to keep her safe? Would you take a bullet for her? Would you be miserable so she can be happy? If you say yes to all of those, you may have found her. But, think seriously, and sleep on it. If your truly sure then I think you found her. Can you answer mine?

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Why would you think that no one could ever love you? All of us here adore you. Your wit and your heart shine through every post you make.

    Don't let the ar$ewipes who torment you get inside your head like're fabulous...we all know it!!! The idiots who look at your outside and call you ugly...they're the ugly ones.

    Being large doesn't make you ugly....being small minded does.

    And they are tiny minds who cannot see the worth of someone like you.

    Source(s): btw...My trailer park fatwa question got removed...lolol...we have to redouble our efforts on that one, obviously. The monkeys are still screeching! (((Lesbomatic)))
  • I used to think that the concept of a "soul mate" was the stuff of trashy pulp romance novels with Fabio covers.

    Then I met you. You rock my world, baby. Literally.

  • 1 decade ago

    I am very happy for you! You sound like you have found true love. As for how do you know when you have found your soul mate? . . . well, you won't have to ask yourself that question, you'll just know :) Enjoy your very special day with your very special man!

  • 1 decade ago

    Damn, that's a massive wall of text...

    Good luck though with approaching that guy...

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