Should Mom's with young children date?

I am just wondering because i have a 6 year old son with Epilepsy. But he is going in for surgery to help with that on this coming Friday. And i just divorced my ex husband earlier this year because he walked out on my son and i because my son was diagnosed with epilepsy. And well last night i asked a question and someone said that mothers with young children should not date.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;%E2%80%A6

It is the last answer on there. And i do understand what she means and everything. So do you feel the same way as her? Why or why not?

BTW my son is 6 years old.

8 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    As a single parent, I believe it's more important to be the parent first. So if you can work in dating, I don't believe it's wise to bring new prospects home until you have really spent the time to get to really know them.

    You have to look at it from the kid's perspective, as they need structure. If a new person comes into their life, they will want to learn their place in this new world. The will gain connections, and then if all the sudden it doesn't work out, it messes up their world with needs of that structure. It can even be traumatic for them if you breakup, which could all ready be an issue with your ex all ready.

    As a human, you have needs, and you need to date, but the challenges are far greater for you. If you think the new guy will be a short-term deal or just not sure about, don't bring them home until you really feel comfortable about them.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    First, congratulations on the fact that your son's epilepsy may be surgically controlled. I'll pray for him. But as to dating, it's fine. You aren't stupid, and for you, dating isn't going to mean being a bar sylut. You are young, and there is no reason you can't or shouldn't find somebody to share your life with. When I met my wife, she was divorced, had 3 kids. 9, 7, and 4. She was also epileptic. We've been married 17 years now, and I'm still thankful that her ex was stupid enough to let her go. Otherwise, I'd never have met her

  • .
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    The child/ren should always come first, but that does not mean a single mother shouldn't date. In fact, the desire for other adult contact and a little affection/intimacy is probably even stronger in a woman with a child who spends a lot of time listening to baby talk and watching Barney on TV.

    As long as she uses good judgment and doesn't have a revolving door of men parading through her home and into and out of her kids lives, she should DEFINITELY also have an adult life of her own...just because she has kids doesn't mean her life should be nothing but the kids.

  • 1 decade ago

    i don't see any reason why you shouldn't date, as long as you're smart about it and your son comes first. you have to be very choosy with the men you decide to bring around your son, obviously. if you're looking for flings, it's better to keep them away from your son entirely. but if you've dated a guy a few times, decided he wasn't a serial killer or child rapist, and you really like him, you have to see how he is around your son before you decide to keep him. what if you fell in love with a man but found out he just couldn't handle your son when you finally decided to introduce them? you can bring a man home around your son without hanging all over him.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I think your primary focus should be your son, but he also needs a mother who is cheerful and happy as much as possible.

    Yes, you should date if you feel interested in it. You don't need to go out clubbing three times a week, but a little bit of time for yourself to be a grown up would be healthy.

    Think balance.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    i have a son,he is six, his mother left me for another man when he was 2 yrs old. Yes you can date but don't mix that with your kids, Don't let your kids see anyone before you are sure its the right man for u and the kids. Have fun but keep things separate, i hope you understand

    Source(s): my life
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Yes you should date. No one said you had to stop living your life becaues you have a child. You must continue to live your life. It is healthy for you to do so.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    absolutely - you SHOULD date -

    got nothing to do with how many kids or their ages - you as a person need companionship like anyone else - go for it and don't let someone on here tell you different

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