Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

How Can I convince my Girlfriend to be Intimate with me again???5 Reasons..?

Help me out please. I'm in a middle of a very interesting, confusing, sexually-frustrating debate with the Love of my Life. I'm going to try and explain this as even sided as possible.

When I first me her, I was so fascinated by everything that she was and stood for, I was cool to do whatever she wanted. She told me she was saving sex for marriage. I thought that was cool. I had the same mentality through-out high school (mainly by default seeing how I was too chicken to talk to a girl as beautiful as she is). Unfortunately, I got married to my now-ex and we had a whole lot of Sex back then, almost to the point to where I was getting sick of it. (Hard to believe? I know) Well, like I said when I met the woman I'm with now, we both decided to leave sex for married and it was fine...until the night that she jumped on top of me and pulled my junk out and helped herself to my manhood. Ofcourse I did not complain. It was THE BEST SEX I EVER HAD...EVER!!!!

The problem is, almost a year later, she's experienced some personal issues, I didn't properly know how to deal with them all and we actually split up for about a month. And as soon as we got back together we had a couple more intimate times that I feel topped our previous encounters.

Now (a Month ago to be exact), she's been avoiding sex. She says sex should NOT be the key to the relationship. And I agree, but I feel like the rug has been pulled out from under me on this one. You all should see how gorgeous this woman is. I can't take this torture. When I try not to think about sex when I'm with her, she'll look at me a certain way, or say something slightly sensual, and dressing very VERY...well, 'nice'.

Here's the thing. I don't want our relationship to be centered around sex either, but it's starting to feel like I can't concentrate on the other things cause we're not doing it anymore. How do I convince her that Making Love is, if not essential. very necessary. Isn't it? I know people DO wait till marriage, but c'mon, that's nearly impossible.

She gave me her top 5 reason's why we don't have sex anymore:

1. We're not Married

2. A relationship shouldn't be built on Sex

3. She just hasn't been feeling like it (which makes NO sense cause she tells me that she masturbates and I feel like she could just call me and I could put that fire out. I thought Masturbation was for single people, not grown adult couples...why are we both playing high school. I'm plain sick of doing it myself.)

4. I don't remember this one

5. Something about making her own decisions and not letting other people tell her what to do....

So I need some really good 5 REASON WHY WE NEED SEX to stay now and throughout our future marriage. I feel like I'm going crazy. I couldn't cheat if I tried cause I'm madly in love with this woman and I can't even think about anybody else. I'm my Girlfriends biggest fan, but I think she's got way too much on her mind these days.

What 5 Reasons can you all help me with to get her to let me make love to her again?

7 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    dude make her hot

    answer mine please??;_ylt=AsCyG...

  • 1 decade ago

    1. You don't need a societal institution (aka marriage) to tell when you are ready to express love to each other (my opinion, at least). That's what I consider a controlling institution.

    2. Just because you like to have sex doesn't mean your relationship is built on sex. Sex is not only about "getting it"; it's also about two people (or more, for that matter) expressing their love for each other. Especially if it's with the same person. It's not all material, contrary to the typical religious belief. It's also emotional. Jeez... it's not like you two haven't gotten to know each other and just said on your first night "Let's have sex!!!"

    3. Holding back feelings for whatever or whomever doesn't make sense. There are multiple ways to express love and sex helps excite one's love life up.

    4. It's natural and I find nothing wrong with it. If you two love each other, and have a real relationship, then why not do it if you want to?

    5. You said something about her wanting herself to make her own decisions. Tell her that this relationship is not an individualistic relationship, but a partnership. You are not to tell her or guilt her into it, but tell her your thoughts and that it would be nice occasionally. Also, tell her to not be surprised if she sees you masturbating sometimes.

  • 1 decade ago

    ok um....

    1. Sex boosts your immune system

    2. It burns calories...30 minutes of sex can burn around 90 calories so if having sex at an average of about three times a week you can loose up to 5 pounds a year.

    3. Sex relieves pain...such as cramps, swelling, and headaches

    4. Sex decreases Aging...

    5. Sex makes you happy...its a good way to up your mood when feeling depressed

    Hope i helped you out in some way...good luck!!!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Making love brings you closer together and gives you a feeling of closeness that you love

    I can't think of four other reasons. =/ Sorry.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Time for you to find another woman. She is playing you for a fool.

  • 1 decade ago

    if you love her so much then get engaged it will show her tht u will not want to leave her for anyone else maybe she is scared u may leave her

  • 1 decade ago

    Find another girlfriend.

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