Help me find out what condition I have?
I'm not sure what to think anymore. I have this... condition, that "enhances" sexual attraction and excitement. The problem is that the thing I use is death. It's very hard to explain.
Many of you will immediately be like "Necrophilia", but that's not the case, I think. It's not about corpses, more about death and dying itself. Like, the cycle of life and death.
I guess I'll just have to say this the way it is: I imagine the woman I'm attracted to dying ("corpses" disgust me as much as anyone else) or very recently having died (preferably not by "natural" causes). This gives me a boost of sexual attraction. But: I don't WANT women to suffer or die, remember that please. I'm not a monster. Actually, the contrary is true: When get this boost, I immediately get intense feelings of protectivity, the exact opposite of what I "did" to her earlier. It's the feeling that I want to cherish and protect her from this harm another part of me had caused before, which gives another boost to my desire. It works very well, and I know that I'd never want to harm anyone, yet still it feels awfully freaky.
Has anyone with any experience in the field ever heard of something that might be connected to this condition? I'm in the process of analyzing myself, and I think this is an important part of it.
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
It could be something called Exophilia: Or neophilia; Its a fetish for the unusual or bizarre.
i would say that although others may find it frightening or upsetting that you feel this way as long as you do not feel the desire to see a woman suffer or die or feel the need to hurt your partner or lover then although unusual its perfectly fine to feel that way, and to fantasize about it.
And obviously make sure that any experimentation is done in a sensitive and consensual way.
EDIT: Have re read the question I have looked again for you and it may also be more closely linked to Paraphillia which is describe as "recurrent, intense sexually arousing fantasies, sexual urges, or behaviors generally involving:
1) nonhuman objects, or
2) the suffering or humiliation of oneself or one's partner, or
3) children or other nonconsenting persons.
I thought that maybe the suffering aspect might be closer to the fantasy you have of seeing them die then protecting them?
- 1 decade ago
Rescuing someone or bringing them back to life is a very powerful and emotional thing. I don't think it's a problem if you want to fantasize that way.
- kt_sub2000Lv 41 decade ago
i would get help, sounds like you have had an interuption in your development, which means you need therapy to make you whole again.
if you are excited by death or women being murdered then you need to talk to someone about that before you hurt yourself or seriously hurt anyone else.