What do I do about these lesbian feelings?

It's been a long time since I suspected I was attracted to women. I can't shake my suspicions. It's very depressing and I have a boyfriend! What do I do? I just want to be normal. I used to be such a good Catholic and now I've become someone I despise.


It's not that I am disgusted so much. My mom always raised me do unto others and everything but that deep down she feels that homosexuality is wrong.

13 Answers

  • Misty
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Pray, go to confession, seek God. Turning from sin is not easy, our nature and the world continue to call us away from God.

    Jesus said the path is narrow and will not be easy. "Take up your cross daily and follow me." This is a road of self-denial and sacrifice, yet full of grace and mercy.

  • We do fight with ourselves. Our flesh wants the opposite of what our soul wants.

    Being attracted to the same sex is not a sin in itself, but it is a cross you must bear. It is when you begin acting upon that attraction that you sin against God.

    If you find yourself attracted to women, then you are called to the same calling as any unmarried person: To remain celibate and chaste.

    I remember reading an article once about a homosexual asking a priest what his calling was because he wanted to have a boyfriend. The answer he got wasn't the one he wanted, but the priest told him that he had a special calling: To be an advocate and an example to all unmarried people and all people struggling with a same sex attraction by remaining celibate and chaste and keeping his life dedicated to God. By taking the narrow path and remaining apart from the world and that he would be rewarded when he entered into Heaven.

    Take a look at this site:


    It is a site for Catholics and other Christians who struggle with homosexuality and remaining faithful to God. It is a support group and it might help you.

    Pray. Every time you get a thought or an urge that is unchaste (this would be about another woman or even about your boyfriend), pray. It won't take the temptation away completely, but it will give you the power to resist.

    Please e-mail me if you want someone to talk to. Or join that site and talk with them.

    God Bless.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Don't despise yourself. If you want to be lesbian, it is totally okay but if you feel happy with your boyfriend then I'm sure your not completely and utterly gay. Try clothing your eyes in a public area and opening them and then asking if you are more attracted to a hot guy or a bubbly blonde in the room. Be honest about you choice and come to accept whatever may be the answer. I'm sure you are still a wonderful Catholic and that despite your worries you will make the right choice.

  • 1 decade ago

    There's nothing wrong with being gay or lesbian. If your faith lets you believe that there is then I won't tell you to change what you think or anything like that. I'm simply saying that I personally feel there is nothing wrong with gay or lesbian people. I am Catholic and straight but I don't agree with the views the church has on gays and lesbians. But if you really want to try and be straight then just focus on your boyfriend and how he makes you feel special and why you were attracted to him in the first place. I don't think you should suppress your feelings but if you really don't agree with that kind of life style then I respect your views and say to follow that simple advice of focusing on your boyfriend. Maybe even consider talking to him about it and see what he says. Whatever your choice though, just follow your heart and you won't go wrong.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I was born catholic too, but I chose to forget that **** eventually. You don't need any religion, honestly. Don't let that hold you back. I know your mom is a different story. Don't tell her yet. She doesn't need to know.

    I'm sure your boyfriend honestly won't care if he finds out you're confused about your sexuality. honestly, he'll probably think it's hot.

    Don't get super depressed yet. You may not be a lesbian. You may be bisexual. You have to consider these things. Bisexuality is very real, and honestly..if you're feeling less attracted to men, it may be because you need to give in to your attraction to women. That's what a lot of Bisexuals go through. Maybe when you start accepting your attraction to women, you'll realize that you're bi. But I would say...**** religion. Really. Throw that **** away.

  • 1 decade ago

    It is clear that you do NOT like these feelings you having let me say a few words.

    I am happy you ask this question and happy you realize in yourself it is not right to feel this way. However, we all attimes get a attaction to the same sex but surely wemust have something in our mind that is of stronge emotion, such as is this feeling the same strength or more so than off a sexy man to you?

    Go to your Church and ask them for help and councilling. Say a prayer and ask God for help and guidance he surely will. The bible does say in the book of Leviticus that homosexuality is an abomination a grave sin. Ask yourself this what is more important to you, entering Heaven or being a slave to a temporary emoion?

    I see you say you have a boyfriend this is great speak about your problems and get guidance from those who care not just about your happiness on Earth but your spiritual life. Emotions come and go, the strong among men are the ones who ignore the bad emotions in them such as wen you get angry do you become weak and lash out or doyou go take a walk and breathe and calm down? What is best here.. The anwer surely is to calm down and not to act out. If we believe that emotions control us and not us them then we are slaves and have fallen and became weak.

    You ae strong girl for even asking this question. Dont be like others in society today and believe its ok to be gay, imagine the pain your mother would feel deep inside knowing she dislikes homosexuality. Imagine the pain your feel when God meets you at the purley gates and says why have you become weak to an emotion given to you by the devil. When he punishes you for it.

    Be strong, you can speak to me at any time if you want I will help you and guide you away from homosexual acts. The act is the sin not feeling the emotion and ignoring it remember this.

    You say it you despize what you are becomming to dont let it go any further, when we have lost faith, we tend to become what we once hated. God told us in the Qu'ran: If you are willing to sell your life on Earth to him then he is willing to sell you a spot in paradise.

    God told us in the bible: If you accept me into your heart then I will grab your hand and never let go.

    I am going to add you as a contact and hopefully you accept and I will be there for you whenever you need it or feel like you may fail.

    remember keep strong girl you have done good by accepting you dont want to become homosexual and you love your boyfriend and dont want to hurt him by being a slave to a temporary emotion.

    Even gay people admitt it, that it is a state of confusion your in so let me unconfuse you or atleast try too.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago


    Im gay, and just coz you like girls does not mean your not normal, im a lesbian and im still normal, i look normal to!

    Homosexuality is not wrong, it dosn't make you, you.

    Im in love with a girl, i couldn't help it, and i accept that, i would rather be with a girl anyday other a gay, because thats what my brain is saying to me. I don't like guys, but that dosn't mean im not normal!

    And about your Mom, she is wrong everyone has a right to fall in love with who they like, be that boy or girl, and you are still a good Catholic, Homsexuality is not wrong, and you can't help it.

    See if your feelings progress and if they do then you may get with a girl and like it, but as for now stay with your boyfriend, see how it goes.

    Youu could be Bisexual there is nothing wrong with that.

    Hope it all turns out well

    Source(s): Im gay x
  • 1 decade ago

    accept yourself for who you, you cant control your feelings, if your attracted to your boyfriend then stay with him unless your feelings for someone else are stronger then you would need toend it with him coz your hearts not completly in it.

    yiou could be a bi sexual and should talk to a close firned or someone about these feelings maybe a sister or a cousin if you dont feel you can talk to your freinds

    but most importantly you cant change who you are and shouldnt try to so accept yourself and dont make a big deal out of it im sure there are loads of people out there just like you

    hope this helped!

  • 1 decade ago

    be who you are dont try to be someone your not if you feel such feelings you should explore. if you feel these things you shouldnt feel ashamed or anything like that or despise. if you feel you might like women then you shouldnt try to change you need to be yourself you may be fnding out who you really are.

  • 1 decade ago

    well if you like girls there is no way to stop it but try to shake off the feelings,

    really your just gunna have to live with it.

    ummm alot of girls think that there gay but are not

    its easy to mistake that you think women are pretty to wanted to do more with them.

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