My ex wife continues to make medical decisions about my children. She only informs me regarding appointments?

The agreement states she is to consult me about health concerns. My daughter is taking a medicine that causes me concern. She also sends co pays beyond the 30 days she is required to send me. I try hard to get along but I also need to protect my rights. My last email I actually sent her the part of the divorce agreement regarding health issues. When I push the issue she portrays me as the bad guy to the kids which is not true. It is quite the opposite as I look into their issues and then form my own opinion. I have joint custody. Going to court makes it worse on all of us. What else can I do to avoid a court hearing?

7 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Is this about your rights or your daughters health?? Look my ex is a jerk - but if the kids are with him and he takes them to an appt and tells me after - good at least he is managing their health...

    I think medical decisions in divorce need to be consulted when they are major... that does not mean you should not be informed.. if you are truly concerned about your kid and not just using this as a power struggle with the ex - why not just call the doctor and get more info about the medicine - they will talk to you - my ex has done that and it works fine for him.. and he too has medical decision power - albeit, I am the one that usually takes them to appts and manages their medical care... its easier if one parent does that otherwise things can get lost in the mix... and to be honest, if my ex was the one always doing it - I would not have a problem with it..

    If she is telling you about appointments, why not go to the appointments - that is another option, that is usually when decisions are made... don;t blame your ex, a doc is not going to wait to take a course of action if she has to wait for your consultation - just let your ex know you will meet her for appt -- and then poof, there you are making choices with the ex for your daughter...

    if thats not feasible, then just trust your ex loves your kid and is going to keep you in the loop...

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    If you're the non-custodial parent, it may not always be easy to consult you before everything she does. I suspect this is more of a power play than actual concern, and if she thinks so too that would be the reason for her not consulting you.

    Oh, wait ... you said she informs you about appointments ... if you want to be in on the decision maybe you should show up for them ... ? That could be why she's telling you about them. She's not going to go to the appointment and then not let the doctor do anything until she consults you. You need to be there if you want to have a say.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I agree with invisible girl. Start going to the doctor appointments, Get more involved in asking the doctor questions.

    I know where you are coming from. My husbands ex wife would take the kids to the doctor for every little thing and just hand us bills constantly. Except she never informed us of when their appointments were. Definitely use it to your advantage.

  • 1 decade ago

    If your daughter is taking medicine that you don't think she needs or could be harmful THEN FIGHT FOR YOUR DAUGHTER. Even if this inconveniences you and you have to show up to court for a half an hour.

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  • Veni
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    The only thing you can do is file contempt charges against your ex since she won't listen to your request and the custody order. If you are not prepared to do that then suck it up and she is going to do whatever she wants.

  • 1 decade ago

    well i kind of didnt understand what u said but yes, ur ex wife should deffinitley inform you on medical information regarding your daughter, after all, u made her.

  • 1 decade ago

    no simple solution but the kids need to be first remeber that

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