Guardianship, Power of Attorney, vs. Adoption?

I am divorced and my ex lives out of state. He sends support, but never contacts her. When he left a few years ago my brother's best friend was helping us (mow lawn, fix house, etc.). Long story short - we fell in love and he will be her step father. He loves her and has been the acting father figure in her life longer than my ex was in her life. So to give him parential rights (now and if something were to happen to me), would my ex sign guardianship papers or power of attorney papers? And how are those different than adoption papers? Is there any way to keep my ex paying support, but allow the acting father to have decision making powers?

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    If you have him sign off his rights and the new man adopt your daughter then he wouldnt be obligated to have any contact and wouldnt have to pay child support, but if you want your new hubby to be able to take care of her if something happens to you, the only thing you can do is have your new hubby adopt her, even if your ex signed guardianship papers, as soon as something happened to you he still has his parental rights in tact and can take custody of her since he is the biological parent, So you can either have the new hubby adopt and have no child support this would entail asking the courts to take the biological parents rights away, or if you want to keep child support theres no way you can take his rights away

    Source(s): experience
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  • Teresa
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    I think this is an interesting question. Currently, adoption is portrayed to children in care other than adoption as the only way to make you part of a family; to give a child that sense of belonging. If children were able to understand they could still have their 'forever family' without needing to lose their identity, contact with first family etc, I believe most would opt for that option once all the emotion had been talked through. I am not sure Guardianship is the only way either though. I know in some places a Guardianship order would not be favoured by PAP's as this sort of order means the mother/parents of the child gets to make fairly important decisions in the child's life such as input as to what school they go to etc. I can see this being a problem point and it opens the floor for many days in court trying to resolve things. I do see the strong need for a Permanent Care order being brought in; one that gives stability to a child's life whilst giving the child unlimited access to his/her first family (if it is the wishes of the child otherwise a plan needs to be put in place with infants etc) and access to all their original paperwork and ONE birth certificate. I do not think adoption is good enough for any child as it has way too many flaws but as someone once mentioned in another answer, the powers that be need to use their imagination to come up with something that offers children who NEED to be in care the best of both worlds.

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  • Billy
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    No. You can have one or the other, but not both. If you want your new husband to adopt your daughter, then her biological father would have to agree to allow that. If he won't agree, then you might as well forget about it because it's not going to happen, period. But if he does agree to give up his parental rights, then he's also free of any obligation to pay child support, now or ever, and that's only fair. So take your pick.

    Source(s): former social worker
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  • 1 decade ago

    No he wouldn't sign those kind of papers-----if your ex signed away his legal rights your husband could, with courts approval, take legal guardianship or power of attorney. At present time your ex already has the same rights as you.

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  • 1 decade ago

    You need to talk to a Lawyer and discuss your situation.

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