Would you be able to forgive them?
Okay, the scenario I'm going to provide is kind of convoluted and something straight out of a soap opera, but hey, weirder crap has happened in real life, right?
Hypothetically: You're still living with family or they otherwise have a certain degree of control over your life. You've fallen in love with someone that they don't approve of. There's nothing actually wrong with the person per se, but for whatever reason your family just does not like him/her. This is assuming you at least somewhat care what they think, though you continue on with the relationship anyway.
So, everything is going all right when you get into an accident (of your choosing) that causes you to lose, say, a year of your life (before you met your SO). Your family decides to relocate to Denmark (or, if you already live in Denmark, somewhere else) and basically wipe out one year of your life. You're pretty much forced to start off anew.
The plot thickens. The person that you have no memory of being in a relationship with resurfaces somehow. Maybe you bumped into each other at Starbucks or he/she found your Facebook. Whatever. This person is able to prove without a doubt that you were happily together. Naturally, this is startling news. Then you put two and two together and realize what your family has done.
Question: Would you ever be able to forgive them?
- Melanie BLv 61 decade agoFavorite Answer
Yes. Likely not straight away because I'd probably be hurt and confused (which would obviously cloud my judgment), but time does, indeed, heal all wounds.
When enough water had passed under the proverbial bridge, I would eventually realize that my family was acting in (what they perceived to be) my best interests. Family tends to do that, regardless of any plans we may make to the contrary and/or preconceived notions we may formulate regarding our happiness as an individual.
True, it seems that they were monumentally deceptive, but it also seems as if things still worked out for me. If, by chance, I hadn't bumped into the person I'd been in a relationship with so soon after the accident, things likely would've turned out differently. But, and oddly enough, if something is truly meant to be, fate has a way of stepping in and righting that which has gone terribly awry.
And, because of fate's rather fortuitous cameo in my life, I would realize the cosmic forces that be must have, on some level, wanted me to be happy. The universe, for whatever reason, decided to give me a second chance, to make up for that lost year, to begin again. And, knowing what I know now, I would also realize that holding on to negative emotions is a surefire way to create misery for yourself, misery that needn't exist if you simply forgave and forgot, and where there is misery, true happiness cannot exist.
In other words, I would focus on my happiness. On that which was positive. On beginning my life again. And, if my family couldn't accept my happiness, I would view it as their problem rather than mine. After all, happiness is both rare and valuable, and when/if you're lucky enough to find it, you don't want to taint it by toting around something as unbelievably burdensome as a grudge.