Is this first bit of my story ok ?

Chapter 1: “Yeah, well I want a refund!” the man yelled at me at 9:07am on a Sunday morning. I was knackered and couldn’t really be bothered to argue with this fool standing in front of me waving a receipt. I had a massive hang over from Saturday partying and didn’t no I would be covering for someone today at... show more Chapter 1:
“Yeah, well I want a refund!” the man yelled at me at 9:07am on a Sunday morning. I was knackered and couldn’t really be bothered to argue with this fool standing in front of me waving a receipt. I had a massive hang over from Saturday partying and didn’t no I would be covering for someone today at ‘Petals’ which is a retail shop.
“I’m sorry I will happily return it” I said so not happy rubbing my forehead. He was like an annoying song that I couldn’t shift out of my throbbing head.
“Not good enough I want to see the manager, I have a complaint” a complaint didn’t cover the anger he was throwing on my so early in the morning – Sunday morning.
“Yes, right away, but what was wrong with the item you purchased?” I closed my eyes and went to my ‘happy place’ HA!
“It tore as soon as my daughter put it on her and it was the right size for her, it also had a huge stain on the inside which I could not see when buying it!”
“Well why didn’t your daughter try it on before you bought it?”
“Because it was a present and it still doesn’t take away the fact that it had a stain inside it!” he bellowed making my head hurt twice as hard. Grrr...I wanted to punch him and send him flying into space. He was pretty urgent and annoyed to come here just after the shop opened at 9:00am.
“How much was it sir?”
“Twenty quid” he laughed. “I wouldn’t pay twenty pee for it now!”
“Ok, I’ll get the manager out here.” I sauntered into the backroom and wandered around until I found my manager: Mrs Smith.
“Yes...problem?” she asked.
“Yes, customer, angry” I said it like I was a robot: something out of the terminator.
She put her legs down and her coffee and her ‘Heat’ magazine, looking totally pissed off, she stomped out of the room and went to the very very angry and annoyed customer.
I couldn’t deal with this first thing on and early Sunday morning with a hangover. I didn’t usually get drunk and haven’t been drinking alcohol that long as I am only nineteen. Yes...I live in the UK were you can drink at eighteen...whoop, whoop!
I had only recently turned nineteen a month ago and have been living the night life and partying like a crazy teen since I turned eighteen.
I sauntered back past the confrontation between my manager and the hairy fat freak complaining. I went to hang around to see if any un-normal people would be in petals at this time in the morning. Nah, maybe grannies but they wouldn’t be in a fashion young girls shop!
“Ellie, over here!” Millie (my work mate) called me over to where she was standing.
“Hey, my head ******* kills!” I fluttered my eyes in pain.
“Hangover?”
“Yup.”
“Hmm, not good” Millie shook her lovely dyed chocolate brown long hair. She wore heaps of make-up and she was like a size 4 sometimes 6 depends what store and clothing she bought. But me on the other hand, I was size 8 to 10 mostly size 8. I have Auburn hair that was straight and long. I always wore my hoop earrings which I hardly ever took out. I didn’t wear heaps of make-up like Millie, but I do love a make-over what girl doesn’t? Oh yeah a tomboy.
“Why do you keep fluttering those blue eyes at me?” Millie said with a grin and a sparkle in her chocolate brown eyes that matched her hair colour.
“I am knackered, obviously” I rolled my eyes this time.
“Yep I have had that feeling many more times than you...even when I was underage.”
“Yeah only because your two years older than me, Gran bag!” I called her ‘oldie’ sometimes as well.
“Ooh, that the best ya can do biatch!”
“Not even close Mcflurry” yes, her name is Millie and she loves her Mcflurrys’ you get from McDonalds and it starts with the same letter as her first name.
“So, ya doing anything Friday night?”
“Whoa, you expect me to plan that far ahead?”
“Uh, sorry I forgot you were still young and learning the alphabet” she chuckled. We were just both horsing around as per usual.
“Yeah, yeah” I folded my arms wanting to fall to the floor, suck my thumb, and sleep like a baby. Not learning the alphabet, that can come later.
“Well when you do no what your doing or not doing text me kay?”
“Sure will” I winked.
“So, got lucky last night with any lads at the ‘Phantom’ club?”
I sighed. “Yeah I wish.”
“Argh, to bad.”
“Yeah well I hope you and Fredrick last more than a week this time.”
“It was more than a week and at least I have one miss loner” Millie had been going out with this guy for a year now, on and off. Okay, it did last longer than a week but no shorter than three weeks.
“Yeah, anyway what...” before I could get us on to another subject (about friends) Mrs Smith called me.
“Ellie, on the till” she pointed behind her to where the till was with her thumb.
“Kay” I held my thumb up to her walked to the till.


SOZ IF TO LONG xxxx
Update: yh but when ppl are angry they dnt bother using the correct terms and language
Update 2: yh its not in paragraphs becasue the way yahoo sets it out sorry x
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