What should i do about my life?

This I my life story... The girl I like,alisha, told me her best friend,katie, liked me. I pretended to believe. Alisha is already dating my best friend, ronuk. Katies friends pressured me into dating her. I was about to say no but alisha heard yes and went and asked her out for me. I went to tell her I did not... show more This I my life story...
The girl I like,alisha, told me her best friend,katie, liked me. I pretended to believe. Alisha is already dating my best friend, ronuk. Katies friends pressured me into dating her. I was about to say no but alisha heard yes and went and asked her out for me. I went to tell her I did not like her but we started talking and I sort I started to like her. I still like alisha more than katie though. An hour later I dumped katie cuz I thought it was too much to handle. Then two days later we get back together and I tell katie that the break up was a dare, which was a lie. The only reason we got back together is for katie being happy and me being closer to alisha. Now alisha and I are like best friends. One day alisha calls me jlk but katie and her friends are listening in on the call. I start talking deeply and I say I am going to break up with katie, but I didn't really mean it. So the next day katie breaks up with me and I get really mad, because I always dump not get dumped. She tells me that she was listening to the conversation I had with alisha. Then I tell her I didn't mean it and we get back together. Right after we get back together I break up with her cuz I feel guilty for like alisha. Katie and I re now "just friends" but she is really mad at me inside. I now hate my life help!!! I make a big fit about being mad at alisha so that she has to apologize to me. I only did that to get closer to alisha. After a week of calling her a ***** I forgive her and stop liking her... Help???!????????!!!!?!?!?!!?!!??!!!!?
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