What do you think of my short DESCRIPTIVE PARAGRAPH?

I have to write a short descriptive paragraph for english. I'm trying not to use the verb to be and powerful verbs in active voice. Also trying to show not tell how the reader should feel. Please correct and add any improvements you can. Thanks. I step into the door and inside the house. Immediately black,... show more I have to write a short descriptive paragraph for english. I'm trying not to use the verb to be and powerful verbs in active voice. Also trying to show not tell how the reader should feel. Please correct and add any improvements you can. Thanks.

I step into the door and inside the house. Immediately black, brick walls surround me. Rust and paint slowly creeps into my nostrils. A rush of coldness flows across me filling my arms with goose bumps. In the corner of my eye, I catch strands of silver mist swirl around. They speed up to me and whisper hisses in my ears. I have no choice but walk deeper into the darkness as the crowd of bodies pushes me forward. Webs slither like snakes against my bare legs. The crunching of glass beneath creates a steady rhythm. A grotesque creature pops out of a coffin in front of me. It has blood all over its head and skinny pale fingers reaching out to me. Its eyes so sunken into their white bare skulls, yet I can still see the red gleam of evil shining on their black beady eyes. Terrifying screams bursts piercing my ear. Only for me to realize they were screams of my own. This is all too real.
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