What do you think of the beginning of my song ?

It's a song I wrote yesterday. Actually, it's only the beginning. Please, tell me what do you think about it.

PS : It's not about me =) .

Everything is in front of me

But I guess I won't catch the opportunity

What I want is way different

I'll always have to be defiant

Of course it's hard to become a singer

Without passion and courage it can be harder

But what if I always take the easy roads ?

I'll just never win at the Golden Globes


There's always gonna be chances

I'm always gonna improve myself

There will be many other obstacles

I'll have to drop everything that's on the shelf

Another world is waiting for me

I'll just cross this line and have the ability

Other experiences are on the other side

I will only stand up with my pride

Hope is the only thing I have

Gift is what I'm hoping to find

I just wish I'll stay alive

And pray for what I"m leaving behind

Honesty won't be really necessary

Cause in this world there's only money

And I haven't finished yet. I didn't find a good title for this song, so if you have an idea, tell me.

Thanks for reading !


3 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Excellent put music with it your target market likes

    & it could be the next number one...!

    Cheers BlueRobbinFlying

    Good Luck (You wont need it though )

    Just a touch of magic will do..

    Source(s): Music Studies.
  • 1 decade ago

    well the number of syllables in each line is way different, which might not sound good, but really I can't judge it from looking at the words, so if it sounds right it is right. For the lyrics, use some more 'subtle' words, like for the line "of course its hard to become a singer," it doesn't really sound like a song, more like just someone stating a fact, so go through and find phrases like that and sort of replace some words with synonyms of the same length (so that it doesnt affect the melody), sometimes people use an adjective instead of a noun, so grammatically it doesn't make sense but it fits perfectly in the song.

    And are you sure its not about you?? It's easier to wriite songs if you really know what you're writing about. I reckon its about you ;)


    Star (just fits)

    Pride (last line of the chorus)

    Wealth or money or something like that from the last verse. Cash Lies?

    'I couldn't come up with a name so I asked on yahoo answers' ie coming up with it yourself is the best way.

    good luck in being way different and winning Golden Globes and all that :)

  • 1 decade ago

    Well, I don't really know, I guess one needs to hear the tune that goes with it, but fair play to you for trying, keep it up, you may well have a best seller.

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