Poem.. please review for school project.. edited version?

Its a very depressing poem yes, but that was the assignment so tell me what you think please: White linoleum floor, teenage girl, broken-hearted, slumped against a wall, alone. Gleaming razor blade, cold against her skin, shaking, flesh opening in its wake, blood. Devirginizing the tile, draining... show more Its a very depressing poem yes, but that was the assignment so tell me what you think please:

White linoleum floor,
teenage girl, broken-hearted,
slumped against a wall,
alone.

Gleaming razor blade,
cold against her skin, shaking,
flesh opening in its wake,
blood.

Devirginizing the tile,
draining her of life, slowly,
taking away her pain,
calm.

Deep brown eyes,
thickly rimmed in black, glossed-over,
consciousness barely within reach,
heavy.

Heart shaped locket,
gently dangling around her neck, a gift,
from the girl she once loved,
regret.

Door creaks open,
allowing her to enter, the source,
the reason for the blood,
pain.

Hesitantly stepping forward,
Embracing the girl, knowing,
saying nothing except,
I'm sorry.

Cold and limp,
nothing she can do, too late,
it was all her fault,
dead.
2 answers 2