i caught my husband chatting with other girls online is that considered adultery?

could i file for divorce under adultery because of this, he's active duty military

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  • 1 decade ago
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    No, "chatting online" with the opposite gender is not legally considered adultery. (I don't even think that it's morally objectionable at all to talk to someone of the opposite gender - it would really depend on the nature of the conversation, I guess.) However, particularly if the conversations are of a sexual nature, it is possible that it could lead to adultery, if he were so inclined, but actual adultery is when the spouse has sex with someone outside of marriage (talking about sexual topics doesn't count).... If he's already committed adultery (i.e., actually having sex with another woman in real life), then the online chat may provide proof of that if they talk about what they did... Even then, it's kind of iffy proof, because chat logs can be easily altered... E-mail is much better proof in court than a chat log.

  • You "caught" him chatting??? You are his wife, not his mother, don't make him feel that you are a demanding authoritarian figure - you really shouldn't put yourself in that position - it's very unappealing.

    Chatting to other people (male or female) is certainly not considered adultery. But it's very evident that it is behaviour you are not okay with ... these boundaries really needed to be negotiated between the two of you, ideally your respective expectations on this matter would have been discussed before you were married. Now, however, you will need to communicate to him in a mature manner what exactly it is that concerns you about him having conversations with other women. If it is the nature of the conversations that is bothering you for some legitimate reason, then you need to make it very clear to him what you find unacceptable. I do think rather than just rushing to file for divorce, you should see if it can be resolved ... it may well be that he is willing to observe some reasonable boundaries you would like to outline.

  • 5 years ago

    Should have ditched him when you found out the first time. He won't change, you can forget about that. You have to make a decision: stay or leave. Is he, otherwise, a good and caring father, financially responsible, and you guys have pretty much the same future goals? Do you want to take the father away from the children? Can you live with his unfaithfulness for the sake of the little ones? It is your choice but you need to be aware that this is not only about you and him; it is about what is best for you children.

  • 1 decade ago

    I would definitely not be ok with that, and I would have a problem if my husband ever did that.

    I would put my foot down, and if he wants to talk to other women and other people on the internet, and not me and my daughter, then out the door with him, or I would leave.

    I need a husband and my daughter needs a father and if my husband ever did that, then time for me to start a new life and find someone who will be a man and a husband, and not someone who gets his ya-ya's from the internet.

    JMO and only JMO.

    Source(s): My source, 17 years of marriage, and I have been there and done that. Misty.
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  • Tia
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Um, no. People can talk to whomever they want. It sounds like you want to find a reason for divorce without you being the bad guy, or for monetary reasons and for those reason get a divorce and let him find a real woman.

    If that isn't it you are either very insecure or he was talking naughty in which case I would suggest couples counseling or file for irreconcilable differences ( or something like that.)

  • 5 years ago

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  • 1 decade ago

    Do you know what he is talking to them about?

    In my opinion, if your uncomfortable about it, then its a problem. If it was me, Id be thinking; why cant you chat to me??

    Maybe a chat to him before filing for divorce would be better. To me it sounds as if you have other suspicions than him chatting to other women online.?

  • 1 decade ago

    I wish people like you and countless others on here that ask "is this cheating"? or "is this adultery"? would look up the definition in a dictionary!

    Here is the definition of cheating/adultery.....did he stick it in her anywhere? If he stuck it in, then that's cheating/adultery.

    If he didn't stick it in, then its something else

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    It is not adultery he must have sex with them.

    If your husband is talking to other women instead of being with you its time for marriage counseling.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    well it does give you evidence he not being loyal i think you need to collect alot more proof for to get ground for adultery get a private eye

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