I think my fiance is a closet alcoholic?
we live w/ his parents at the moment b/c he will put an application in & not check on it, then say he cant get a job(the last job he had was before i knew him, & i have known him for about 6 years). living here was supposed to be a VERY temporary thing, but it has now dragged into 4 going on 5 years. we were supposed to move when i was pregnant, then it turned into after the baby was born, then it was before we got married. the baby is now almost a year, and the wedding is 13 weeks away. his mother from what i can tell wants me to leave & leave my son & my fh there so she can have them & not have me around. i dont work any more b/c i cant afford day care & i take care of my son all day. i have no family of my own really other than my son. before i had my son, i worked 2 part time jobs, one of which would give me close to full-time hours. i was working close to 60 hours a week between the 2, 12-14 hour days 5-6 times a week(i would work an 8 or 9 hr shift @ 1 job then work 4-6 hours at another job). fh used this as an excuse as to why he couldnt get a job(he would have to drive me like 2 miles down the road to my other job- if i really had to, i could have probably walked). the 1 day i had off every week he was off w/ his friends. i did this until i physically couldnt anymore(i had complications w/ my son when i was about 5 or 6 mos. pregnant that continued through until his birth- i was so big @ 5 mos. people thought i was having twins, & i am very small in stature, so it was very hard for me to stand for 3-5 hrs @ a time. i had to quit both my jobs when i was 7 1/2 mos. as they thought i might go into labor on the job & there was a likelihood of a delivery complication). i had money saved of my own & bought most of my sons things(all but a few of his clothes, toys, diapers, wipes, etc.; i breastfed b/c it was better for him & so i didnt really have to buy formula), paid off my delivery(money that i later got back & used to pay off my son's circumsion & for other things for me & my son, including food; i had to go on medicaid b/c my insurace terminated when i had to quit), etc.
he gets money from his mom all the time. she enables him w/ his smoking too(when our son was 2 months old, he told everyone he was trying to quit smoking- his mother came back from up north with a box of cigarette filter tubes, tobacco, and a rolling machine for him b/c she saw fh's cousins's wife doing it & "thought it was neat").
i just dont know what i should do, if i should do anything. it really bothers me, but no one else seems to care or see a problem. i just dont want my son to see his behavior & think it is ok. what should i do?