Anonymous
Anonymous asked in 藝術與人文詩詞與文學 · 1 decade ago

我的英文自傳...幫我看一下

My name is Chiao Shi, Yan. I was born in Kaohsiung city. My major is accounting and I am graduated from I-SHOU University at June 2008.My family members are mother who is a cook, and a younger brother who is a student. When I was a child, my mother run a dressing store. My mother makes a policy for education with the liberal way in order to bringing up my interest. And it can let me get more chances to broaden my views. She teaches me an important notion about doing my best. For example, being is an was effective experiences that I learned predominant ability. However, in my school life, I was often elected as a leader of the association.

Beside,the most important thing is I ever been related working experience for half-year in the travel agency.

I work in mature way and in positive attitude. I am willing to work with high passion and pleased to do the task. If I am lucky to be one of the members in your company it would be my honor. I will do my best because one of my duties is to work hard.

我覺得好像有點不順ㄟ....怪怪的

麻煩幫我看一下~~~~

2 Answers

Rating
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    The cover letter's purpose is show your education and experience that related to the job you want to apply not simply describe your family. Employer is not interested in your family but yourself.

    First of all, you need to define what kind of job you are looking for such as accounting clerk.

    First paragraph: show your enthusiam why you are interested in applying the job, do research about the compnay show that you are interested and ready to work for the company.

    Second paragraph: show your experience and education related to this job, not necessary to describe your family members or where you were born...key issue, strenths and skills related to the job, look in detail what kind of person the company is looking for. You may also want to describe any soft skills gained from part time job or social club such as leadership, communication or any outstanding record from your record.

    Third paragraph: reinforce your interest and skills that can benefit for the company and provide the contact information for the company to contact you.

    Source(s): myslef cover letter
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    我英文也不是說太好,

    但你 I am graduated from 應該改成 " I graduated from" 才對,

    至於其他...可能要找英文不錯的啦!

    你可以詢問看看以下網站,

    因我常去看求職與英文文章:

    http://tw.myblog.yahoo.com/jw!w6gPRaOCFQVCeNg8iHiY...

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