Help with controlling my girls behavior.?

Okay I am a father of triplet 10 year old girls. I do not have a problem with them minding me. I have never laid a hand on them nor do I plan on it. My question is they do not mind my wife at all. The only difference between our method of punishment is she believes in spanking with wooden spoon or hand. This... show more Okay I am a father of triplet 10 year old girls. I do not have a problem with them minding me. I have never laid a hand on them nor do I plan on it.

My question is they do not mind my wife at all. The only difference between our method of punishment is she believes in spanking with wooden spoon or hand.

This is a major battle between us. I was raised in an abusive childhood and do not believe hitting your child in any type of way accomplishes anything.

What can my wife do to change their attitude towards her, they do not act like they respect her or mind her unless I am around.

I am at my wits end with it and feel so sorry for my wife on one end but then mad on another because she spanks and yells, to me basically does almost what was done to me as a child.

Please help me with this situation, they are all ready 10 and scared to death what they will act like towards her when they are teenagers.

Yes my wife is what you would call a push over, she does not have a lot of self confidence and I know the girls see this.

I do everything I can to give my wife the support she needs.
Update: I love my wife and girls with everything I have got and just want to make this better for her and them.
Update 2: My wife spends a lot of time with them, but no not alone by themselves. With three of them it is hard to do that, she is in girls scouts with them. Now they only act this way around her, not when out in public.
Update 3: Thanks SugerBYT, I believe you are right. Hitting does no good all it does is make an angry adult. I think the only good thing that came out of it is I am breaking that chain and not doing like my parents and many, many, and I do mean many step parents had done.
4 answers 4