Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingPregnancy · 1 decade ago

My 2 year old is afraid of the dark and i'm 9 months pregnant?

My daughter Lainey is afraid of the dark. I can't deal with her after I have the baby. She always wants to sleep with us. But i'm going to have to make her go in her bed. She has a night light. What do I do?

23 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I found some info which I've put here:

    Two-year-olds and fear

    It's normal for your child to be fearful. After all, anxiety is a natural condition that helps us cope with new experiences and protects us from danger. Some 2-year-olds are frightened of very specific things: bugs, dogs, the dark, even the vacuum cleaner. Other kids are afraid of new situations or meeting new people. Most of your 2-year-old's fears will fade as she becomes more secure in herself and her environment.

    What you can do to ease your child's fears

    Acknowledge her fears. They may seem silly and irrational, but they're very real and serious to her. Try not to smile when she tells you she's scared of, say, a flushing toilet or a siren. Let her know you understand how it feels to be afraid of something. If you're reassuring and comforting, she'll learn that it's okay to feel afraid and that it's best to deal with her fears. "Try to depersonalize the fear by getting your child to talk about it or label what's making her scared," says William Coleman, a behavioral pediatrician at the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill. "Fears won't go away if you ignore them."

    Trying to convince your 2-year-old that there isn't any reason to be afraid will only backfire. You'll probably just make her more upset if you say, "It's okay, the dog won't hurt you. There's nothing to be afraid of." Instead, try, "I understand that the dog frightens you. Let's walk past him together. If you don't want to do that, I'll hold you while he walks past us."

    Use love objects. Some 2-year-olds get a great deal of comfort out of dragging around a raggedy baby blanket or clutching a well-worn teddy bear. These objects can offer an anxious child lasting reassurance, especially at transition times, such as when you drop her off at daycare or tuck her in for the night.

    "Lovies" can also make it easier for a child to do potentially scary things like meet new people, attend a play group, or visit the doctor. So allow your child to hold on to that special toy or blanket. She's likely to stop carrying around that mangy-looking monkey by the time she turns 4. By then, she'll have learned other ways to soothe herself when she's frightened.

    Explain, expose, and explore. A scared child can sometimes get over a fright if you provide a simple, rational explanation for what's worrying her. You may put an end to her fear of being sucked down the drain along with the bathwater by saying, "Water and bubbles can go down the drain, but rubber duckies and children can't." Or explain that an ambulance has to make a really loud noise so that other cars know to get out of the way.

    For some 2-year-olds, a demonstration can be reassuring. A 2-year-old may be relieved to see that while a vacuum cleaner can suck up crumbs, sand, and dirt, it can't inhale her toy train or Daddy's toes. A walk at dusk can help make nighttime seem more magical than scary. If your child is trembling at the thought of having her haircut, let the hairdresser snip a strand or two of your own hair to show her that it doesn't hurt.

    If past experiences are fueling her fears — vaccinations, for instance — don't sugarcoat things. But don't dwell on the bad stuff, either. Gently tell her that while the shot may sting at first, it'll be over quickly, and then suggest that the two of you do something fun afterward. It's important to stay with your child during a painful procedure to show that you support the treatment and haven't abandoned her, says pediatrician Barbara Howard, a member of the American Academy of Pediatrics' committee on psychosocial child and family health.

    You can help your child learn about frightening things from a safe distance, too. She may get over her fear of Halloween characters if she sees a picture book or video about good witches, kind ghosts, and friendly black cats. If she's scared of animals, a trip to a petting zoo, where the creatures can be stroked and fed, may help.

    Problem-solve together. If your child's afraid of the dark, get a nightlight for her room. Other tactics you can use to banish bedtime fears include a designated guard (a beloved stuffed animal), "monster spray" (water in a spray-bottle), or a magic phrase that wards off unwelcome visitors. Through trial and error, you and your child will figure out what helps to increase her sense of power and control over things that go bump in the night, or in the day. Just don't expect her to overcome her fears right away. It can take months — even up to a year — before a child gets over a fear, says Coleman.

    Practice through pretend play. If your child is terrified of the doctor, she may benefit from role-playing what happens at the doctor's office (a toy doctor's kit can help). If your 2-year-old shrinks at the sight of strangers, she may feel less frightened if she acts out such encounters using dolls or stuffed animals. If people in costumes scare her, dress up together — don't forget the face paint

  • First... there really should be no reason she is afraid of the dark,, i would take the night light away it seems mean bt this really is not going to go away.. do it slowly if you can but you should have tried a few months ago bc this is really going to be alot harder on you then her.. she will be fine but ou have to quit her cold turkey where sleeping with you is concerned.. i would put her in the room make sure she knows its going to be ok give her or get her a special "keep me safe toy" and reward her big time when she makes it through the night.. when she has andshe will maybe not right off but soon enough.. make her feel like a big girl and explain that she can't sleep with you because of the new baby

    i don'tknow how much she will understand if youtell her mommy is having a baby you can't do this because i know my 2 yr old doesn't fully get it either all you can do is try..i hope it all works out for you but she needs to feel like she is safe as well so make sure you still keep on that.. good luck ;0

    Source(s): mommy of one 2 yr old and 34 weeks with # 2
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Let her fall asleep with the light is on,

    and when she goes to sleep go and turn the light off,

    but keep the night light on.

    And if that doesn't work,

    hopefully the phase will end soon,

    Good Luck.

    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Get your 2- year old a " Glow Worm " toy, it works !

    Every child in my family gets one, and they squeeze it when something looks funny to them and they are not afraid of the dark.

    Also use a wind-up alarm clock in the bed and the ticking noise sounds like a heartbeat, and lulls the child to sleep. There is a sense of security in the sound of a heartbeat.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Tell her she is the BIG girl now so she gets to sleep in her own room because she is the BIGGEST and tell her you want to spend the night with her the 1st night, then you'll go to sleep with her and leave her when she's asleep after that maybe the 1st week until she's ready to do it ALL BY HERSELF :). If she comes in your room late in the night it's ok. You are breaking a habit and it runs into her comfort zone so you have to do it right by her.

  • 1 decade ago

    this is very tricky.a good idea that would benefit you and lainey,would if you maybe put her to bed early and put on a dvd.keep the light on.hopefully when she would more then likely become sleepy and fall asleep.or maybe just get her a night light.good luck =]

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    hey... don't be to harsh on her i used to be the same and i was made to sleep with out the light and im now almost 20 and have panic attacks in the dark. there must of been something to trigger this off. id make sure she has a little dimmed lamp rather than the plug in lights because they don't give off much light. and make sure she has Teddy's etc to comfort her....=)

  • 1 decade ago

    I had this same problem when I was little. My dad left the closet light on instead of a night light for starters because it gives off more light. And then you should lock your daughter's door behind you, just keep putting her to bed and tell her she cant sleep with you until she gives up and falls asleep.

  • 1 decade ago

    She's 2. She's trying to control the situation. Leave the light on. Get a dimmer switch and let her pick her illumination level.

  • 1 decade ago

    Deny her sleeping with you. Explain why. Hall light might be a good idea too, indeed.

    Don't let her control the situation. YOU are the boss.

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