If Bipolar Borderline Personality Disorder people fear abandonment why do they use "splitting" & ignore friend?

Why do people with Bipolar Schizoaffective Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder Ignore? Why do they use their illness as an excuse to manipulate and control others by using the Silent Treatment to Dump and Ignore the people who are closest to them (loved ones, significant others, boyfriends, girlfriends,... show more Why do people with Bipolar Schizoaffective Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder Ignore?

Why do they use their illness as an excuse to manipulate and control others by using the Silent Treatment to Dump and Ignore the people who are closest to them (loved ones, significant others, boyfriends, girlfriends, dating partners)?

What I mean by this question is, why do people with borderline personality disorder ignore the person whom they have decided to "hate" and/or "paint black"?

Why do they ignore their loved one with whom they have had a one-time falling out with, when the loved one try's so hard to talk to the BPD person to get things solved?

It's always one-sided, where the "loved one" seems to be the only one constantly trying to repair the relationship.

I've done my research on the disorders, so no need to describe what BPD is like, and no need to use political psycho-babble regarding "codependency."

I just want to see if anyone, with or without this disorder, can answer my question on why they ignore the person.

Is the ignoring permanent? How many days must go by before it's considered "being dumped?"

Finally, please define "splitting"...
Update: There are 14 pages listed at the bottom of this link I'm enclosing which shares similar situations where BPD people just vanish out of relationsips/friendships with no explanation or discussion. I wish there were a way to deal and react to the situation besides knowing "why" they do it. Here... show more There are 14 pages listed at the bottom of this link I'm enclosing which shares similar situations where BPD people just vanish out of relationsips/friendships with no explanation or discussion.

I wish there were a way to deal and react to the situation besides knowing "why" they do it.

Here is the link: http://www.suite101.com/discussion.cfm/depression/108673/1-2
Update 2: And another link which I could totally relate to:

http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=273189
Update 3: My bipolar loved-one also came from a broken family. The mother became a drug addict after he was born, custody battles during his childhood, placed in foster care at 16, rehab twice for substance abuse with marijuana, cocaine, meth, alcohol. He's taking 4 pills a day of the most powerful anti-psychotic... show more My bipolar loved-one also came from a broken family. The mother became a drug addict after he was born, custody battles during his childhood, placed in foster care at 16, rehab twice for substance abuse with marijuana, cocaine, meth, alcohol.

He's taking 4 pills a day of the most powerful anti-psychotic available called SEROQUEL. The medication makes him numb and tired. He goes to therapy once a week, and a psychiatrist every 3 weeks for medicine monitoring.

I just feel he's making a conscious decision to disappear and dump the people closest to him. He's super promiscuous, a High school drop out who works at mcdonalds part time, and no drivers license.

The irony is they say they don't want to "hurt " us, but that's EXACTLY what the end up doing....HURTING us 10 TIMES MORE!!
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