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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

How do you tell a guy that he blew it?

i met him last week and we have been out twice...

Seems nice, is accomplished and very very motivated.

Older (he is 35 and I am 25) and does all the right things. I do enjoy his company.

However he has done two things which i severely question.

On Saturday around 9:30 he sent me a strange text.."lets make love" after our second date. I let it slide and assumed he had gone out and had more drinks.

On another occasion, i was discussion some problems I was having at work..he took a deep breath and with all serious, suggested that a great way to take my mind of things was to "get naked"....hmm....

I told him that i wanst interested in rushing the relationship...he apologized and we ended the call amicably.

These calls/correspondence all happened within a weeks time.

He has been a complete gentleman at ALL TIMES when i am with him, and we have not had our first kiss yet.

So while i was VERY into him....this kind of ruined it for me...

But i dont want to just DISAPPEAR...how do i tell him?

33 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    tell him your actions have turned you off him, you were growing to like him, because you felt he was mature, but after these two incidents, he may need a bit more time to grow up. thanks but maybe we'll be right for each other in a few more years time.

    he does sound like a loser dressed up as a gentleman. you dont need that, nor do you want that. truthfully, if you have to, just stop answering him - ignore him and let him find some other girl to get into bed with. you're better than that and im glad you can see it. Well done. You are streets ahead of alot of girls your age.

  • 1 decade ago

    Honestly hon, this is what is on most men's minds from the very first date. Only he jokingly said it, but at the same time was hoping for a "welcome" response. The fact that hes 35 also means that he has been on the dating scene a lot longer than you have, and has probably had many dates where sex was on the menu for him almost from the start. You must also remember this. But you're right, I wouldn't be comfortable with that kind of talk so soon either. If he says it again, tell him politely but firmly that hes not helping matters and ask him to back off. But bear in mind, this may be all it takes for him to walk away, as he seems to be focusing on sex a lot and if he knows he won't get it soon, he may go looking elsewhere and leave you behind.

  • 1 decade ago

    By your own admission, this guy is motivated and accomplished. You call him a gentleman and haven't so much as kissed after two dates, yet you obsess over two little faults to the point of griping about it on the Internet.

    If you're this picky and anal-retentive about men, you deserve to live alone with a bunch of cats. Let him go so he can find a woman who accepts him as a human being instead of wishing he was a walking ATM with the sex drive of a totaled Trabant.

  • goggin
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    wellbeing a guy, i will help you already know that he sounds slightly actual to me. If ur saying that he asked u out, that does propose that he's attracted to u. Had it been which you had asked him out and then he could have blown u off, then there could've been a solid hazard that he didnt like u. yet i think of a few people do have mothers and fathers that are no longer understanding adequate. besides the reality that it rather is been like a 365 days, be slightly extra affected person. He would become a solid one. desire I helped?

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Well I just think he's trying to be funny and let you know that he would eventually like to. If you feel uncomfortable with how he says things then don't let it go tell him how you feel. If you let things go then its much harder to bring it up. Being intimate with him is going to come up eventually you may want to have that first kiss and see where it goes but take things at a pace that you are comfortable with. Talk about it calmly and also listen to what he has to say.

  • 1 decade ago

    He wants to make this a bedroom deal -although judging by your avatar, I have NO IDEA why. That thing is hideous!

    I would personally just stand your ground because once you cross that line, you're now the office slut and that's not a good label.

    BTW you posted this exact SAME question and I already put a better answer on the first one, so I hope you choose me.

  • 1 decade ago

    Dudes a perv. Tell the horn-ball to just get lost and that your on to his casual sexual quests with women he's just met. Tell him you're not looking for someone like that and don't want a relationship based on sex as you're not in high school anymore. He's probably married and just wants to get some extracurricular action as quickly and effortlessly as possible behind the wife's back.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    He might be trying to make a joke but is very bad at it. Confront him about it and say that 'your not comfortable with comments like that'. It is then upto him to stop them.

    Also, incase he wasn't joking, make him wait longer for sex than you normally would, this way you'll know if he's gonna stick around even if he doesn't get any.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Yeah...um you shouldn't stay...you're in a danger zone right now, you need to call him and say "listen I'm sorry but things have gotten a little too weird for me lately with all the sexual remarks so I just don't think we should see eachother anymore"

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Didn't we just cover this the other day? Not happy with the first round of answers?

    He's a guy, get over it.

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