funniest thanksgiving joke?

looking for the funniest, clean thanksgiving joke you have. shorter preferably, and able to fit in a text message. thanks!

13 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?

    Pilgrims!

    Why do turkeys always go, "gobble, gobble"?

    Because they never learned good table manners!

    What key has legs and can't open doors?

    A turkey!

    What happened when the turkey got into a fight?

    He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

  • 4 years ago

    Thanksgiving Jokes Clean

  • Erika
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Thanksgiving Jokes And Riddles

  • 5 years ago

    For the best answers, search on this site https://shorturl.im/awk4Z

    *BEST OF THANKSGIVING JOKES EVER* How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving? He was very thankful. What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy! How many cooks does it take to stuff a turkey? One, but you really have to squeeze him in! A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy answered, "No ma'am, they're dead." What does a Pilgrim call his best friend? A palgrim. Why can't you take a turkey to church? Because they use such FOWL language. Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk? To try to hatchet! Knock, knock! Who's there? Arthur. Arthur who? Arthur any leftovers? Teacher: "What did the Indians bring to the first Thanksgiving?" Student: "Baseballs." Teacher: "Baseballs?" Student: "Yeah, they were Cleveland Indians!" What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? Yes - a building can't jump at all. What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving? The letter G! If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims! A poultry farmer was experimenting to breed turkeys with more legs for greater profits. Finally, he succeeded. While narrating the results to his friends, he told them, "The turkey I bred had six legs!" His friends who had got quite excited, eagerly asked, "What about the taste?" The father said with a long-drawn face, "Do you think it is so easy to catch it?" Teacher: "Why do we have a Thanksgiving holiday?" Student: "So we know when to start Christmas shopping!" Two pilgrims go out hunting. One has two blunderbusses (guns). The second pilgrim asks, “Why do you have two blunderbusses?” The first pilgrim explains, “I usually miss the first time I shoot. By taking two I can shoot again”. The second pilgrim thinks for a while and then says, “Why not just take the second one, and only shoot once?” What do you get if you cross a pointy black hat and some leftover turkey? A Witch-bone What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit? A poultrygeist! Hope you laugh till you cry,lol.:)

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  • 1 decade ago

    These can be text'd a few at a time.Remember it's Thanks Giving so they aren't as bad as they sound.:-)

    Things You Can Only Say At Thanksgiving!!

    1) Talk about a huge breast!

    2) Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

    3) It's Cool Whip time.

    4) If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst.

    5) Whew, that's one terrific spread!

    6) I'm in the mood for dark meat.

    7) Are you ready for seconds yet?

    8) It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

    9) Just wait your turn, you'll get some.

    10) Don't play with your meat.

    11) Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.

    12) Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?

    13) I didn't expect everyone to come at once!

    14) You still have a little bit on your chin.

    15) How long will it take after you stick it in?

    16) You'll know it's ready when it pops up.

    17) Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!

    18) That's the biggest one I've ever seen!

    19) How long do I beat it before it's ready?

    HAPPY THANKSGIVING

  • Hagen
    Lv 4
    5 years ago

    funniest thanksgiving joke

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    This Site Might Help You.

    RE:

    funniest thanksgiving joke?

    looking for the funniest, clean thanksgiving joke you have. shorter preferably, and able to fit in a text message. thanks!

    Source(s): funniest thanksgiving joke: https://shortly.im/fOwOe
  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    Why did the turkey cross the road? To get to you house so that you could cook him for Thanksgiving. Knock, knock! Who's there? The turkey that will be cooked.

  • 1 decade ago

    It's kind of lame...but I'll give it a try.

    What do Hippies put on their Thanksgiving potatoes?

    Groovy

    =p

  • Cate
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    The good ones that I know are all too long for a text so the only short one I know is pretty lame but kinda cute:

    Why can't you take a turkey to church?

    Because they use such FOWL language

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