Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingNewborn & Baby · 1 decade ago

Do you think this would be inappropriate to ask my family regarding Christmas?

My husband has a very large family that gets together for Christmas (including aunts, uncles, and cousins, it's over 25 people) Well, we've all been buying presents for everyone for the last couple years.

However, this year we just can't do it. There's just not enough money with the way the economy is and I know money is tight for everyone else.

Do you think it would be inappropriate of me to ask if we could all just buy for the kids this year?

That way the adults don't have to spend money buying gifts for each other. After all, Christmas gifts are more for the children anyway. I enjoy getting together, reminiscing, and enjoying a meal with my family far more than any gift they could buy.

42 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    That's what I'm doing.

    I'm only buying for my son and my best friends two kids.

    I can't afford anything else. When I told that to everyone, they were more than understanding. I'm still depressed about it though.........

  • 1 decade ago

    I think it would be fine if you were to ask that of your family. You are definitely right when you say that Christmas gifts are more for the children anyway. Your family should be understanding since money is rather tight for most people these days.

    Last year was the first year that someone brought up the fact that they just couldn't afford to buy so many people gifts, so my entire family agreed on a new tradition: just buying for the kids. And not only that, but to make things even easier, all of the younger kids (ages 2-10 in my family) draw names to buy presents for each other. Kind of like a secret santa thing. So now I only have to buy for the kids that my kids draw their names.

    What we did for the adults was a yankee swap. We set a limit of $25 and every adult bought a gift of some sort that did not exceed that limit. We put all of the gifts, wrapped and everything, under the tree. Then all of the adults picked a number out of a hat. #1 got to pick any present they wanted and open it in front of everyone. Then #2 went and picked any present and opened it in front of everyone. After that, they got to either keep their present or swap with #1. Then #3 went and did the same thing and got to swap with either #1 or # 2 or keep the same gift. This went on through 20 or so adults until the last one opened the last gift and got to either keep it or swap with any person.

    So that is what we do in my family now. It saves people a lot of money and frustration. Especially those who have their own kids to buy for, like me.

  • 1 decade ago

    My hubby has a big family too, and most can't afford to buy for everyone. We all buy for the kids, and here's what we came up with for the adults, which is rather fun.

    Every adult buys a non gender related gift, i.e., lottery tickets, picture frame, you get the idea. Then, how ever many adults show up, you get scraps of paper, and write numbers on it. Each gift has a number on it, to match the scrap papers. Everyone picks a number from the hat. Starting with #1, that person opens their gift. Then number 2 opens their gift. If number 2 wants number 1's gift, they steal it, and give them their gift. All the way through the numbers. If number 25 wants #5's gift, then they steal it, and give them gift 25. You never know what you will end up with, cause someone might steal it, everyone gets a gift, and it's a hilarious game that could take hours. Our limit is 10 dollars. But each adult has to bring their own gift. Just an idea you might try, instead of saying you don't want to buy gifts at all. Good Luck, christmas is a rough financial time for most of us. LoL

  • P
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    I don't think it is inappropriate at all. I agree, Christmas gifts are more for the children. I know I will get more joy out of seeing my son happy with a gift then myself. I felt the same way about Christamas this year, times are tight and to buy for everyone becomes a major financial burden. Especially since my hubby's parents and divorced, and this split his family to two huge family's. For my family, we ended up setteling on just drawing names and doing a gift exchanges, so you only have to buy one gift for one adult. Then in the other family's we are doing a white elephant. It pretty much just for fun, and doesn't cost anything. You just find some odd useless item in your house, wrap it up, and then pass them around. People get to choose which one they want by the outside of it..... it usually makes for some good laughs, especially if people find some really unusual things to use. Maybe you could do that for the adults and start a new tradition.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    That is a PERFECT solution...I know what you mean by the Money Issues...Here in our Town (Like most any other town) we have a few Big Churches and the Salvation Army that Provide Meals for Low-Income Families and My Kids and I usually go Serve for a couple of Hours on Thanksgiving and Christmas...BUT this year they won't Need us because the Food Banks are so Low on Food (due to this Recession) that they will only be serving from the GOOD SAMARITAN Meals-on-Wheels Truck and only the 1st 500 people will get a Meal...I want To Cry!

  • 1 decade ago

    We always just do what we can. We've been anti credit card at Christmas time long before it became popular this year.

    You can suggest just buying for the children - or you can suggest drawing names - so that you're just buying one adult gift. If they don't like the ideas as an overall thing to do for everyone, then just say you'll just be buying for the children because that's how your budget is this year - or whatever. There's no reason to get into debt at Christmas time. Gifts are nice - but not if they're going to compromise paying your bills.

  • 1 decade ago

    We've got a baby due in December, a 4 yr old and the obvious economy fun!

    As a result we mutually decided along with my partners family that we will each just buy for our own kids.

    It's not inappropriate. It's your money and there is no law saying who you must buy for. If they get stroppy about it then they haven't worked out that Christmas isn't about who gets the most presents!

    Chances are, they are thinking the same thing and are also worried about bringing it up. The economy affects everyone!

  • 1 decade ago

    With a new baby we can;t afford anything. I asked my family if we could all buy $5.00 gifts. wrap them, put them in the middle and pick gifts... each gift can be stolen twice.... It's a LOT cheaper and it's a game instead of a buying extravaganza.

    I want to spend the most money on my OWN kids. The rest of the Holiday's should be about family not the present.

    I hope your family agrees with your suggestion. I think money is tight for everyone this year!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You could also suggest doing a "secret Santa" gift exchange. Or a white elephant gift exchange. Then you only will buy a gift for ther perosn whose name you draw. Or just do a random exchange of gifts. I don't blame you though. We are trying to figure out how to get everyone in our family gifts too. It's a little annoying because my family always get each person multiple gifts and my husband and I just don't have that kind of money this year. It's tough. I'll have to read your answers to see what everyone comes up with. I'm curious too.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think that would be fine... another idea is to do a secret santa and each person buy a gift for one other person. You can include the kids and adults. OR we do secret santa for the kids and play white elephant for the adults in my family ... there is also over 25 people in both my family and my husbands family.

  • There is absolutely nothing wrong with asking that. That is what my family did when I was growing up. Especially with the economy the way it is right now, a lot of people are going to be cutting back, including my husband and me. Christmas is about being with family, anyway and enjoying time together.

    My husband says it's all about the food! lol!

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