How do i get rid of having a silly crush on someone?

I have a crush on this guy but i know he will never feel the same way for me. I am just get annoyed that why does he have to be so cute. I never showed any interest in him other than ask when i needed. But then i'll no longer need his help anymore when i am finished what i am doing. I am just annoyed that i am... show more I have a crush on this guy but i know he will never feel the same way for me. I am just get annoyed that why does he have to be so cute. I never showed any interest in him other than ask when i needed. But then i'll no longer need his help anymore when i am finished what i am doing. I am just annoyed that i am sure he's laughing at me and thinking how imbalanced i seem that i sometimes i ask stuff i should already know or be able to look up myself. I think part of it has to do with my depression in that i am lazy to figure out things i on my own and I just wish i had his attention.

He's never going to be attracted to me and that hurts. He's always been nice to me but i just feel mad at myself because i like him and want to forget him and stop with this silly crush. I am just making a fool of myself that it seems like a lot of pressure just to see him. Then realize, i don't really need his help at all.

I don't have anyone in my life. Besides trying not to think of him, i am suffering major depression and i have no doctor to go to because they all bailed out on me and they didn't have time with so many patients to deal with that i am not on their priority.

I just wish i didn't feel such crap everyday. I wish i could be in a serious relationship instead of just fantasizing about it.

I wonder if he knows i have silly crush on him. I feel like deep down he's laughing at me. I see him smirking when i ask him stuff. I just want to shrink and disappear when he makes me realize that the answer is so obvious. Then i feel so embarassed and uncomfortable having asked him. My depression is just makes me lazy. I have no motivation to get things done. My mind is all scattered. I wish i wasn't so emotional. Life doesn't seem fair. I wish i had a soulmate. In fact, i wish he was mine but of course he won't ever. I really got to stop thinking about the impossible and stop embarassing myself. I just need to concentrate on my work and get it done because i am not ever going to see him again.
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