Why have i am always such a victim?

i have had problems in my life but i have never dealt with them until they turned into big problems(even then) I can never speak about anything personal and keep my feeling hidden. I am very unnassertive and sometimes let people walk all over me. Why am i like

10 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Would it be presumptuous of me, if I said that you have an extremely overbearing mother.

    Low self esteem is formed in your younger years.

    there is good news though, you can turn all this around. Rome wasn't built in a day, so baby steps are required, if you are ready to make a change that is.

    You can begin to take back your power by not giving in to demands on your time and energy.Just say no. People will respect you for speaking your truth. Tell yourself every day, "YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE" and I am worth it.

    with many high hopes for your new found strength.

    Always... with Grace

  • 1 decade ago

    I understand that it is difficult to take care of "small" problems until they become big ones, I was there. What I realized and what I live by is what I call damage control... take care of the small things to help ensure the big things don't appear. This isn't always effective but a small confrontation is better than a big one. Basically bein fed up will allow you the confidence to face your fears... that is what it boils down to... fear of confrontation or being alone or you pick what suites the situation. One way I found to talk about waht was bothering me was to confide in a casual friend that is trustworthy... it is a lot easier to talk to someone who will not be so quick to critiscize you but possibly offer guidence.... intelligent people are the best because they will offer more insightful assistance.....but it is only assistance you will have to find the power to control your world on your own.... hope that helps and good luck

    Source(s): Personal experience
  • 1 decade ago

    How old are you? You sound young. I still keep my feelings hidden and nobody knows me well at all, but I am now extremely assertive and nobody walks on me anymore. I'm not bossy or mean, am polite and smile, but I make sure that I am always in control of my own life.

    It took years and years and years and not one, but two near death experiences for me to say enough is enough, I'm going to be in control of my own life. Basically, I got lucky.

    Talk with a counselor if you are able, you really need someone to help you. E-mail me if you like jana042 at yahoo.

  • 1 decade ago

    Dear, just try to be yourself and dont let anyone walk over you or exploit you for any reason because that shows only that we feel weak inside. Be strong and confident. Every single person in this world has his own freedom and right to live life to the fullest and to be happy. When you feel upset or anything, talk it off with friends, parents, family, anyone. Noone is alone. We have only one life and it is so short, so enjoy it. Dont bother about what people talk about you, just be yourself. Do things that you feel happiness in..... good luck..

    Source(s): went through such a situation..
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  • 1 decade ago

    maybe you like seeking approval from people. you just want people to like you. i don't know how old you are but i was like this once, too. it basically just took a lot of heartbreak and a lot of growing up to realize this isn't a way to live. i got sick of being walked over, got sick of having my heart broken and pretty soon resorted to trusting nobody but myself. now i don't care what people think about me. i still take care of myself and pride myself on my image, but in no way am i stuck up or conceited. i take care of myself first, and worry about others second.

  • 1 decade ago

    stop playing the victim game how many more times are u going to let them hurt you before you snap and you put them in there place

    Source(s): i used to be the same way
  • 1 decade ago

    Learn to stand up on your own. Independence. Survival. You need courage. Gotta be strong.

  • 1 decade ago

    cos that is maybe your personality... i also keep all my fellings to myself it takes me very long to trust somebody

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    you will grow stronger after you feel you have had enough, must be soon sounds like your growing frustrated

  • 1 decade ago


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